How to make your own gasoline/petrol
This is not an April fools joke!
As one of your resident mad scientists I am coming here to teach you and eventually the whole world how to put the gas companies out of business and bankrupt the middle east which will stop all this money driven terrorist crap. terrorists no have money; terrorists no have guns!
OK so this is gonna be some costly and hard to perform thing right? No, in fact I'm sure even your lazy ass can do it once a week with barely any effort
Things you will need, a vegetable oil maker, (all it is is a food processor hooked to a high heated metal tube with a crank that pumps the tubes contents through the hot tube into a metal colander where it's hot juices are mashed out) you can do this yourself without the tech, heres how;
Take grass clippings, yard waste, left over fat or food waste: chop frantically
take remains and put in blender, blend.
heat skillet or pot over high heat, sear (cook) the yard and food waste till it looks carmelized (golden brown) and wet.
pour into a piece of strong cloth over a large and deep pan, close the edges of the cloth into a grab-able handle and begin twisting the cloth till all the juices run out into the deep pan, do this with each batch. remember, cooked vegtable or meat juice turns into Oil!
once no more drips; Empty the contents of the cloth into a fire pit, burn them completely into ashes. - this will release the carbon!
mix the ashes into the oil!
heat over medium heat!
Use a metal funnel and hose to collect the steam! run the steam into another pot with ice below it!
In pot 1 where your oil was take the remains and strain it through cloth to remove the ashes! = You now have crude motor oil! carbonized fossil oil!
In pot 2 where the steam has dripped, you now have refined liquid gasoline!, careful it's explosive!
so, every time you cut the grass, clear the kudzu, pine needles and wisteria you can make gasoline with it!, it's better if you combine vegetable oils with animal fat oils for better consistency.
There you go, free gas, make it and sell it to your nieghbors.
You get rich
Oil companies go bankrupt
Terrorists have no dirty oil money
government has no gas tax
You drive for free!