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 HOLY SHIT NEWS! #72 
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Post HOLY SHIT NEWS! #72
Hell-O & Whalecum to the 72nd edition of HSN!

- It's that time of year again, a year to where you should be thankful of your Mother... Unless she's a whore, or didn't want you, or if you were born in a Lab, then no.

- SUPER COMPUTER TERRORIST AIDS!!!: The Ransomware/Worm known as "WannaCry" is spreading faster than the fuckin' Plague, infecting thousands of PC's. It utilizes leaked NSA tools that exploit holes in the Windows OS that even Microsoft didn't know about. HOLY FUCK!!! It's spreadin' faster than Paris Hilton's legs so update ya bitch ass OS's and get some heavy duty virtual Condoms up in this bitch!!!

- North Korea has launched a "Ballistic Missile" in it's series of Missile tests and okay, ENOUGH! Them cunt eyed little shit's ain't gonna do shit! If they bomb something that isn't the goddamn water, then I'll report it! In the mean time, they can suck my sweaty nuts!!!

- Finally, Emmanuel Macron is now the President of France. I don't know who the fuck is his, but he's married to his School Teacher so... yay?

This is the madassgamer and let the shit games begin!

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Sun May 14, 2017 7:14 pm
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Post Re: HOLY SHIT NEWS! #72
madassgamer wrote:
It's that time of year again, a year to where you should be thankful of your Mother...
:P
madassgamer wrote:
Unless she's a whore…
:l
madassgamer wrote:
…or didn't want you…
:=(:

I know somebody that was told he was an accident; his parents told him I was a bad influence and he couldn't hang out with me. :confused There were right. :awesome His mom was a MILF, too. :face

Also, “cunt eyes” is my fetish.
cooki:

Back to you, brother. :arnie

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Sun May 14, 2017 7:29 pm
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Post Re: HOLY SHIT NEWS! #72
In technology news, Netfucks now blocks any factory-rooted or clean mobile devices as part of a new DRM strategy to 'stop pirates' - more like doxxing you, amirite?. We interviewed a customer who had been locked out by this fiasco. Hello, Boing Boingo - what can you tell us about this unpleasant discovery?

"Doingboingboingboingboingdinkboingyboingbungbangboingboingbongboingboing."

(Translation: I bet they were obligated to do this via contract with various sources of media (TV shows, movies) or lose access to them. Still bullshit though. These creeping DRM practices eventually will require your ID, as in your name, address, etc to be permanently tied to your phone and online services won't work unless the info you gave them matches the info of your device.)

Old media needs to die, I concur. Buncha lazy parasites.

We have here with us, Professor Blah Blahson - an expert in cybersecurity and technology trends. Professor, how do you feel about these new DRM features? Are these constant, intrusive software designs tailored to get your identification making it easier for malware to be 'legalized' as DRM?

"Blah" *EXPLODES*

I couldn't have put it any better myself. Back to you in the studio.

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Mon May 15, 2017 12:15 am
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Post Re: HOLY SHIT NEWS! #72
Happy Mother's Day to all.

Super computer virus, hmmm, I think there was supposed to be a solution workaround? Maybe slow and steady wins the race? Oh well.

Ah, the North Korea and Cold War stuff. I believe they did/tried that already. This is one of those chess game things. Huh.

fluffy wrote:
Also, “cunt eyes” is my fetish.
cooki:
Ah, I think he meant stint/slant/closed/blind eyes. Like those Yellow Peril yellow journalism stuff. As much I would like to point fingers, I have to say the other side doesn't seem to attend the cooling. God, I hope they aren't the fucking foreign imperial military recruitment. They think they can just throw away our lives and ascend to heaven. God, I hate those guys.

Emmanuel Macron is way better than the right conservative Le Pen because she happens to cut dual citizenship against French Israelis in order to curb ethnic/racial tensions. However, she is willing to sell them up for a Russian citizenship. With the over the edgy stuff that the red Mother Land can pull, that makes things in the world much worse. Glad things happened the way it is now, lest prepare for the Dark Ages, for Armageddon.

Looks like the entertainment industry is ramping up the step towards dystopia. Next thing, billboards with a all out heavy industrial and ominous office city coming near you. Hopefully, ads don't invade all of privacy. Get cyberpunkie!

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Mon May 15, 2017 12:36 am
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Post Re: HOLY SHIT NEWS! #72
WannaCry info

1: it only targets businesses.
2: it isn't one of those viruses that uploads itself through some back door port.
3: it is obtained through email
4: you have to actually load a suspicious email to get it.
5: it's not necessarily a virus because after it infects something it does not attempt to infect other machines linked to it or search your records for emails and send itself to them.

why does it work on businesses? it exploits a business policy that all emails received by the PR/support department need to be opened, read and answered if there's a question. So even a suspicious email needs to be opened, in fact most of the employees reading the emails default to the stupid system where they open an email and delete it while it's open which loads the next email.

point of fact every email provider should have that function permanently disabled, while an email is open if it's deleted it should return you to the inbox to prevent accidents.

point of fact, email providers should force people to manually input the email addresses they wish to receive mail from everything else should be blocked, but then they couldn't send you add spam so this is entirely a anti-business malware..

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His name is not Robert Paulsen, His name is Gregory Matthew Bruni, he won so hard.

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Post Re: HOLY SHIT NEWS! #72
fluffy wrote:
Also, “cunt eyes” is my fetish.
cooki:
Speaking of cunt eyes...

Spoiler: show
Brothel - Ol' Fuckeyes
Link

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Mon May 15, 2017 9:12 pm
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Post Re: HOLY SHIT NEWS! #72
BREAKING NEWS: I'm getting radio chatter on local channels about a terrorist attack that took place in Washington DC today. 9 civilians hospitalized, one in critical condition. The perpetrators have been identified as of Turkish origin. More as this story develops.

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Post Re: HOLY SHIT NEWS! #72
YomToxic wrote:
BREAKING NEWS: I'm getting radio chatter on local channels about a terrorist attack that took place in Washington DC today. 9 civilians hospitalized, one in critical condition. The perpetrators have been identified as of Turkish origin. More as this story develops.


do keep us updated.

I sure wish there was a way NCSoft's game servers could be targetted by the ransomware.

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His name is not Robert Paulsen, His name is Gregory Matthew Bruni, he won so hard.

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