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 hfygs! 
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Post hfygs!
Rules and shit: Ok, this game is easy. all you have to do is choose an option from the previous poster then continue the story.

example:
1st poster: a man named jack walked into the thread. SUDDENLY!
> he saw a fish
> he saw your boner
> he sawed off his boner
> he is now a fish.
2nd poster: >he is now a fish.

In order to find the water, he traveled to the big mountain...
>blabla
etc..etc...
============================

You were sitting in your apartment in the shithole, minding your own business when SUDDENLY...

>Slutty McSlut demands you sex her up RIGHT NOW OR ELSE.
>Penelope McSlut attacks you, demands pooper.
>You are kicked into a wall by McSlut and discover a shimmering portal.
>You decide to fap.

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Fri Oct 12, 2012 3:27 pm
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Post Re: hfygs!
>Slutty Mcslut demands you sex her up RIGHT NOW OR ELSE

So you start having hawt kitty sex and THEN...

>your ass gets invaded by surprise anal beads
>you are interrupted by a dancing banana
>slutty mcslut hid a surprise in her kitty, and it turns out to be..
>everything goes fine, you have a few scratches on your back and you have no idea why your piss is red the next day, but then the universe implodes(FUCK FUCK FUCK BADENDING)


(out of context, i demand this game be in font family courier or some other cool monospaced pixel font, it FEELS right, also, this game is pronounced hifEgus if pronounced at all)

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who149 wrote:
I'm trying i'm trying~ i'm making I'll try too slowly up my posting. At least once a day for a bit. Then I'll up that too twice, then four, then 8 and so on.
Until eventually I wake up one morning and find out that I am actually an Idiot hero.
On some quest too cheat on his gf or raise affection of 5 women who conveniently live in my the same dorm as me.
In which I only have 100 days to seduce them all.

Remon wrote:
Now we can dominate the porn industry, camera industry, AND the world!
YomToxic wrote:
YOU BETTER STAY ALIVE OR ELSE I WILL HUNT YOU DOWN AND RAPE YOU DEAD.

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Sun Oct 14, 2012 8:22 am
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Post Re: hfygs!
>slutty mcslut hid a surprise in her kitty, and it turns out to be...

a shimmering portal, that sucks you into it's powerful gravity well. After a long fall through a powerful worm-hole, you end up on a field of grass with a blue sky above you. The fresh breeze carries a hint of flowers, and smoke from a bonfire, roasting marshmallows.

You get up and dust yourself off, then proceed to
>masturbate furiously
>masturbate gently
>take a nap
>investigate the marshmallow roasting

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Sun Oct 14, 2012 10:33 am
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Post Re: hfygs!
>take a nap

while napping, you dream that you are shinji, sitting in a bed, with asuka and rei and misato next to you, you decide to

>fuck misato, causing the rest of the people to poof away
>rape? rei, causing the rest to poof away
>get raped? by asuka, causing the rest to poof away
>masturbate furiously, causing everyone to stare at you awkwardly

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who149 wrote:
I'm trying i'm trying~ i'm making I'll try too slowly up my posting. At least once a day for a bit. Then I'll up that too twice, then four, then 8 and so on.
Until eventually I wake up one morning and find out that I am actually an Idiot hero.
On some quest too cheat on his gf or raise affection of 5 women who conveniently live in my the same dorm as me.
In which I only have 100 days to seduce them all.

Remon wrote:
Now we can dominate the porn industry, camera industry, AND the world!
YomToxic wrote:
YOU BETTER STAY ALIVE OR ELSE I WILL HUNT YOU DOWN AND RAPE YOU DEAD.

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Sun Oct 14, 2012 1:12 pm
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Post Re: hfygs!
>You rape Rei.

As you grab Rei and roughly pin her to the bed, Asuka and Misato vanish. Rei seems to be frightened and at first resists your advances, but then, realizing your intent, smiles weakly and embraces you. Her lips close in on your ear and she whispers.

"Shinji, I'm a clone of your mom."

Shinji's world collapses. The realization alters his perception and the gateways of new universes open before you.

>Go through the starry gateway.
>Go through the black gateway.
>Go through the wooden gateway.
>Curl up into a ball and start crying.

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Sun Oct 14, 2012 1:30 pm
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Post Re: hfygs!
Nostalgia everywhere.

>Go through the wooden gate.

You wake up, suffering from a major case of morning wood. Desperate to hide the evidence, you

> Take the day off.
> Become a cute little girl.
> Wear an extra layer of pants.
> Walk outside naked.

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Mon Oct 22, 2012 5:19 pm
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Post Re: hfygs!
> Walk Outside Naked.

When walking outside, sporting your giant boner, someone running franticly(probaly late for work) bumps into you, you both fall, the girl is in a schoolgirl outfit, and looks to be excell, you notice that she didnt have any panties on, and in falling, has impaled herself on your penis

you...

>stare at her blankly
>roll over and commence a difficult rape(excell is soo energetic)
>listen to her rattle on as she bounces up and down
>do a backflip in the air and land a perfect ten, with her still impaled



(not my best but..)

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who149 wrote:
I'm trying i'm trying~ i'm making I'll try too slowly up my posting. At least once a day for a bit. Then I'll up that too twice, then four, then 8 and so on.
Until eventually I wake up one morning and find out that I am actually an Idiot hero.
On some quest too cheat on his gf or raise affection of 5 women who conveniently live in my the same dorm as me.
In which I only have 100 days to seduce them all.

Remon wrote:
Now we can dominate the porn industry, camera industry, AND the world!
YomToxic wrote:
YOU BETTER STAY ALIVE OR ELSE I WILL HUNT YOU DOWN AND RAPE YOU DEAD.

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Tue Oct 23, 2012 8:44 am
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Post Re: hfygs!
>stare at her blankly.

Excel has a job? You didnt know that! (Episode 2)

Being impaled on morning wood seems to be a regular occurence to her, as she walks it off and then invites you to visit her place. Maybe she may have the cure for your bad case of morning wood?

You
>Decline politely.
>Agree politely.
>Laugh.
> :jont

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Tue Oct 23, 2012 4:20 pm
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Post Re: hfygs!
> :jont

I have no idea what this means, but let's not stop at that! On with the show!.

You and Excel do the 420 and go to her house, and strike up a few blunts. However, Excel, being Excel, has doped the weed with acid/DMT and Pineapple Juice and your shit is fucked. You start breathing flames and Excel does her 'hail illpalazzo' dance. A firetruck approaches because someone reported the smoke from your bonging session - and rams through the door.

You

>Punch the fireman.
>Throw books at him.
>Love Excel up like a hippie.
>Eat the firetruck.

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Mon Oct 29, 2012 2:40 pm
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Post Re: hfygs!
> Decide to dick-slap people.

You smile mischievously and go on a rampage, dick-slapping people with your enormous PINGAS. Needless to say, this rampage earns you a spot on the special reports of several national TV stations, and pretty soon, you notice 3 stars flashing at the limit of your vision. You grin maniacally and dickslap a van, propelling it into a police chopper and causing them to explode. You take note that the three stars in your peripheral vision are now four.

You
>Go hide in a garage
>Continue your rampage
>Masturbate furiously
>Look for Excel

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Mon Oct 29, 2012 4:09 pm
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Post Re: hfygs!
>A and B
You hide in a garage, and masturbate furiously
Once you've came on your garage floor, four zombie pirates try to take over your garage.
you:

>Stand ground and fight!
>Run away like a little school girl
>Stand there like a retard and let things happen
>Find excel

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Tue Nov 06, 2012 1:25 pm
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Post Re: hfygs!
> Find Excel!

You'll probably need backup to handle the zombie pirates, and you jump out of the garage, and begin looking for Excel. Walloping a zombie pirate with your penis, you start running towards Excel's house.

Suddenly, up ahead, you see a gang of plush teddy bears. The one that looks like the leader notices you, and grunts out "Hey, you're not getting to Excel's house!"

You stop, and...

>Run! Those guys look dangerous!
>Attack! You MUST find Excel!
>Surrender to the police.
>Eat pringles.

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Tue Nov 06, 2012 3:22 pm
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Post Re: hfygs!
>Eat pringles

You stop, and eat some pringles.

I love pringles. :)

The teddy bear guys get mad and attack you!

>You duck and stab the attacker!
>You jump back, and punch the attacker!
>You disregard his action, and keep eating the pringles!
>Run away!

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Wed Nov 07, 2012 4:50 pm
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Post Re: hfygs!
>You jump and punch the attacker!

Your fist makes a heavy impact on the side of the bear's cheeks, and its eyebrows puff up and blacken as its skin pales.

Image

The leader collapses, a thin, purple fluid dripping from its obviously broken nose. You have scared the rest of the bears, but they regroup and prepare to attack!

You...
>SPLIT YOUR LUNGS WITH BLOOD AND THUNDER, WHEN YOU SEE THOSE DAMNED PUCHUUS.
>LOOK HIM STRAIGHT IN THE EYE, AND MAN THE HARPOONS
>Kick their nuts in.
>Run past them and look for Excel.

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Wed Nov 07, 2012 11:35 pm
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Post Re: hfygs!
>?

The zombie pirate runs up to a house, and knocks desperately.

His mom opened the door, got scared And said, "You're movin' with your aunty and uncle in Bel Air"

You
>Laugh!
>Go look for Excel, dammnit!
>Visit Pizza Hut
>Visit Dunkin' Donuts

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Thu Nov 29, 2012 2:49 pm
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