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 BlindMute Loli (B) 
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Post BlindMute Loli (B)
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Thread 1

Well /b/ I've decided to take tomorrow off which is why I'm up writing this, and it's not copypasta (or not yet). Anyways, I work at a fast food place (it's a local thing so I won't bother mentioning the name). I was just about ready to close up shop, everyone else had already left, when I noticed a little girl walking around outside. She was just sort of loitering, walking around in circles. I didn't really get a good look at her, but I continued with closing procedures. After I had locked the safes and checked and double checked this and that, I noticed she was still out there. She was just sitting in the rain. I figured she must be lost, so I decided to do my good civilian duty and help her out. Upon going out there I got a good look at her. She looked to be around 7 years old, with short black hair (pageboy style like Rei). I didn't really know her ethnicity, she looked pale white but had some asian features. Her clothes, a pair of jeans and a t-shirt (hardly fitting attire for the weather) were tattered, dirty, soaked, and it looked like she had been wearing them for quite some time (and she didn't smell like roses and candy either). She had her face in her knees just sort of lightly sobbing, and she didn't seem to notice me even though I was fairly close to her. Until I finally said "hi". Then she looked up, and I could clearly see she was blind. This startled me a bit, and now I felt bad. I just let some blind defenseless girl cry outside of my store while I went about my business. Unlike most /b/tards, I have some conscience (and I wasn't actually thinking about sticking it in the pooper). I asked if her if she'd like to come out of the rain. She got up, and I lead her into the store. I asked her if she wanted something to eat, and she nodded her head yes. She didn't answer me
06/21/07(Thu)05:16:03 No.30517692

about what she wanted though, and that's when it hit me again. "Can you talk?" I asked her, to which she shook her head no and started to sob a bit more. I put my hand on her shoulder (not pervertedly) and said, "It's okay, I'll make you something good." She dried her tears a bit, and I fixed her a sub. I gave it to her, and she devoured it. Since her clothes were in terrible shape, and she acts like she hasn't eaten in forever, I asked her my third question. "Do you have a home?" to which she again gave a meek no. I didn't want to see her cry again, so I told her I'd take her back to my apartment (and no, once again, I wasn't trying to stick it in the pooper). So, in that very short amount of time, I now had this little girl accompanying me home. And I was thinking that she probably should've been snatched up by pedophiles by now being out on the street. She's tattered and dirty, but still pretty underneath. I took her out to my car, and buckled her into the front seat next to me. I think I could tell at that point she wanted more to eat.
06/21/07(Thu)05:16:35 No.30517735

On the car ride to my place I didn't really know what to say, so I was generally quiet. I asked her if she had any parents, to which she responded no, so I suppose they're dead. I asked her old she was and she stuck up 8 fingers (I was close). Every once in a while I would put my arm on her back and rub it a bit, trying to be comforting. I don't really think she noticed or cared. Obviously some bad shit has happened to her, and for all she knows she could end up in my glovebox. Of course maybe 8 year olds don't think thoughts like that, only /b/tards like me. We arrived at my apartment, and I walked in with her. My roomate Luke was up in the living room playing 360 online, and he just gave me a raised eyebrow. Luke wouldn't suspect me of being a pedophile or serial killer, but one of us bringing an 8 year old home isn't normal. So I told her to go into the kitchen and eat what she wants, and I'll talk to Luke. I gave her a gentle nudge in the direction of the kitchen and she went in (they're connected except for a little counter thing between them). He turned off the 360 (oh noes his rankings). "So what's going on?" "I found her outside of [place where I work]" "So you brought her home?" "She's blind, mute, and she doesn't have any parents or a place to stay." "Okay, but she's sleeping in your room."
06/21/07(Thu)05:17:08 No.30517777

And with that, he turned on his 360 again. We were friends, but we made it a priority not to pry in each other's business. I went back into the kitchen to find my loli friend sitting down with a bag of chips she found. I realized that I forgot she's blind and has no idea what my kitchen's layout is. I asked her if she wanted something else, and she nodded her head yes. I thought of the only thing I could, and grabbed a paper and pencil. I put the pencil in her hand and pressed it down on the paper. I had no idea if she could write or not, but she wrote down a rough sort of scribbly word which I made out to be "sandwich". So I put together and sandwich with anything I could find, salami, cheese, etc. I didn't think she would be a picky eater. She inhaled it pretty much, and it was at this point I remembered she smelled like somebody had used her hair to clean their colon. She needed a bath, and since she was blind I would have to be the one to give it to her. I said "How about we get you clean?" and she nodded yes. I wondered how long it's been since she's bathed. Luke looked back at me and just shook his head, so I put my hands up in the sort of "What else am I going to do?" motion, and followed her into the bathroom.
06/21/07(Thu)05:17:19 No.30517793

I peeled her clothes off of her, and put them on the ground for later burning. I grabbed the soap and washed her, she didn't seem to object to me doing this. I got her as thoroughly clean as I could, and I could tell she was getting very tired. I dried her off, and her eyes were shutting so I carried her to my room. Walking out of the bathroom carrying a naked loli in my arms, Luke gave me another look. A look like, "Man I've been minding my business all night but what the hell are you doing?" I payed him no mind and carried her to my room. I put a pair of my boxers on her and a t-shirt of mine and laid her on my bed. I put the quilt over her and she settled immediately into the bed. She looked like she was the most comfortable she's been in a long time. I didn't know where she had been sleeping for the past bit, but it was probably wasn't ideal. I sat down on the edge of the bed and popped my shoes off and just gave a sigh. Not really of frustration, I was just disillusioned with what was going on. I went out of the room and turned the light off (she was already fast asleep by now) and went out to Luke. We played some Perfect Dark and discussed some chick, ignoring the obvious topic.
06/21/07(Thu)05:17:33 No.30517813

After I got finished with him, I realized this was probably /b/'s specialty and decided to write it up. I don't really know what I should do with her. I was considering taking her to the police station, but I began wondering. Why would she run away from home? Maybe she has some physically or sexually abusive father at home who's just going to go and claim and her and beat her or molest her again. She said her parents were dead, but that might not be entirely true. And I began wondering if I technically kidnapped her. She could just be some kid that ran away and if her parents raise a ruckus could I get in trouble for doing a good deed? I hope not. I do need to get some sleep though, so I'll be going to bed soon. I've decided to take the day off tomorrow, to figure out who she is and I think she might have a little cold (I sound like a mother already!). So yeah, no pooper sticking, sorry for wasting your time /b/.
Thread 2

The next day, he continued the story with this: (Note: These posts were copied to wikichan much after the post had died, so timestamps are unavailable)
Post 1

Hey /b/, it's the guy who took in the blind mute loli from last night's thread. If you didn't read it, you can at http://4chanarchive.org/brchive/3051767 ... irl+story/. Anyways, for those of you not in the chat last night, Erika (her name) slept soundly in my bed and drooled all over my pillow. I was up till 6:30 talking to /b/tards so that's when I went to bed. And no I didn't crawl in bed with her, I slept on the floor beside her. Suddenly I wake up feeling a little foot on my stomach. I realize that it's Erika who's awake and out of bed, and stepped on me sleeping on the floor. "Uh, you're stepping on me." She realizes this, and sits back down on the bed. I sit down beside her and look at the clock. It's 8 am, as in way too fucking early since I skipped work today. "Did you sleep well?" She gave me a thumbs up in response. I wiped some of the drool off of her chin and put my arm around her and lead her to the bathroom since I had to go and I thought she might too. We both went, and headed out to the kitchen. I could hear Luke bellowing in the shower, or as he calls it, singing.
Post 2

Luke comes out in a towel, which is odd for him since he usually comes out naked. And for the record, Luke and I are NOT gay. We're just old buddies, like brothers, he feels comfortable around me. And without him, I wouldn't have a place to stay and neither would Erika. In the kitchen, Erika was sneezing a bit. She probably had a cold from being out in the rain last night in her tattered clothes. I grabbed some tissues and let her blow into them. Luke emerged from his room with some boxers on (again I think he's forgetting Erika is blind and can't see him). "Good morning San Francisco" (We don't live in San Francisco, Luke just says odd things) "Hey Luke, how about making us some breakfast?" "Sure, I've got a bit before I have to head out, don't you have to get going though?" "Nah I'm taking the day off." "Since when do you skip work?" "I want to spend some time with our guest today." At that moment, Erika's face sort of "lit up" a bit. Like she was surprised somebody wants to spend time with her. Of course the real reason is that I had to figure out what to do with her, which made me sad. Luke made some eggs and bacon, and I made some toast and served it to her. She kept eating it, and we kept dishing it out. As she was eating, she looked really happy to have it. Made me happy, and I could tell Luke liked it too. After breakfast, Luke rushed to put deodorant on (he smells like his dog's asshole without it), feed his dog (who finally got his fat ass off of the couch for food, I make fun of Luke's dog's weight problems, but I do like him), put his work clothes on and leave.
Post 3

This left me alone with Erika. I didn't really want to jump in asking her questions yet, so I decided to watch some tv with her. We both sat down on the couch and she must have still been pretty tired since she rested her head on my shoulder. I flipped to various things, Lazytown, gameshows, Terminator. She didn't really care what we watched, she could only hear the dialogue anyways. So I imagine she just made her own stories to go with it. I'm pretty sure that she's watched (and yes I know she can't really "watch" anything, I'm just using that for lack of a better verb) tv before. After a bit, I decided that I should know what's going on. I turned the tv off, and asked Erika if we could talk a bit (talking for her being writing on paper). She gave me a thumbs up, and I grabbed a notebook and a pen for her. I asked her about her parents, what happened, why she's out on the street, and I'll spare you the whole back and forth but here's what I've learned. Her parents and little sister died from some accident (she didn't tell me what). She was put in a children's home, but the conditions there were bad enough to make her want to run away from it. So she did. She was out on the street (I don't really know how long, but probably not too long, she'd starve) before I found her. So I wondered what was going on at the children's home to make her want to run away. Maybe the other kids bullied her for being blind and mute, maybe nobody wanted to adopt her and she felt neglected, maybe the staff was abusive. So she's basically a runaway, but she has a strong strong aversion to going back to any home. At this point though, my heart was going "aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaawwwwwww" and my brain was like "NO DON'T DO IT YOU'LL GET RAPED IN JAIL BY A BIG GUY NAMED BUBBA LUMP JACKSON" but my heart was winning. So at the current moment I have yet to call Child Services, and I really don't know if I should. I'm considering maybe calling them to see about adoption, but in the mean time she'd probably have to go back to another children's home and she'd dislike me for it.
Post 4

After a few questions, she started crying so I gave her a nice big hug. "Shhh it's okay, you don't have to tell me more if you don't want to, let's go watch more TV" I dried her tears and I turned on the tv again. We continued watching for a bit, and then I decided on doing something. I left her on the couch for a bit and went out and got my laptop. I opened up notepad. I was going to teach her how to type so our communication would be easier. And maybe some day she could buy one of those portable voice synthesizers or something. Since she can't see the keys, I decided on teaching her this way. She hits a key, I tell her what she hit. Eventually, she'll memorize the layout of the keyboard in her mind. First I went through all of the keys, and pressed her finger down on them and told her what it was. She had never used a computer before, and found it weird. Then I had her press random keys, and told her what it was so she could get a feel for where keys were in relation to each other. Then I told her to press a certain key, and had her press it. She got a few right, but most of them she forgot. Then I tried to have her type "cat" which she needed help with. I could tell she was getting bored with it though, so I let her watch TV and signed on AIM to talk to a /b/tard or two. It was about 1:30 then, so I decided it was time for some lunch. She still had a bit of a cold, so the perfect cold food is soup right? Except we didn't have any soup. So I made her a microwavable pizza (I'm not a brilliant chef). We both chowed down on it though, and she seemed satisfied, getting pizza sauce all over her. I cleaned it off, and had another idea.
Post 5

The famous Mortal Kombat player fatal1ty was blind right, so why couldn't Erika play some? I powered up our Sega Genesis, and gave her a controller. She held it oddly, having really no idea what to do with it. I made my best effort to teach her a bit, but I didn't really think she understood it. She just pressed buttons. So yeah, my attempts to transform her into an ass-kicking loli MK player didn't work out so well, which I probably should've known. She was perfectly content to listen to me play though. She seemed to be having a bit of fun really. After that, my next idea hit me. Music. I grabbed the notebook again and asked her if there's any music she liked. She wrote down some usual kid stuff, pop and such, but I gladly downloaded it and played it for her. Then I played her a bit of my music, which she didn't really like. "That's okay, not many people share my tastes in music."
Post 6

I could tell she was still a bit sleepy, not having gotten good sleep for a while. "How about a nap?" She nodded her head, and I picked her up and carried her to my room. I let her down on my bed. "Goodnight." I went out and did some things, enjoying my day off and such. Around 5 Luke came home, which means I had to talk to him about the situation. He sat down, and could seemingly tell what I wanted to discuss. "So, what did you find out about her?" I told him the story, as much as I knew, and I could tell his heart was going "aaawww" too. "But dude, we don't have the money!" "Yeah we do Luke, if you cut down on the video games and Gundam models and shit, maybe we can sell Kaji" (Kaji is his dog, yes he named it after an anime character). Kaji, who was lazing in the corner, looked up at me, as if he knew I was talking about him. Luke sighed, I could tell I had him right where I wanted him. FINISH HIM! I walked Luke to my room where she was sleeping. "So Luke, can you honestly say you can tell this little girl to leave? She obviously hated it at the children's home, if she goes back she might just run away again. Anything could happen to her, she could get sick, she could get picked up by a pedophile--" "She's not already picked up by a pedophile?" "Shut your mouth, Luke" I knew I had just given Luke the fatality though, he couldn't look at her sleeping and think about giving her away. "Okay, we'll see how it works out."
Post 7

Luke and I went out and played some Xbox for a bit, discussing his girl life again. He told me he had a date tomorrow, with a chick named Melinda. I hoped she wasn't a crazy. I kid Luke about dating crazy chicks, but really the only thing is he once dated a fursuiter and brought her home. I didn't want him exposing Erika to any perversions. "Don't bring her home if she's dressed like a fox, k?" "Hey at least I get some ass" That was true, I was lacking in the ass department. Not that Luke is the assmaster. He continued, "How about that one chick at work who's on your dick, get with her yet?" "Yeah, she's coming over tomorrow" The chick in question was Megan, a girl who works at the same place I do. She's the girlfriend of the boss's son, and only 15. She wasn't working tomorrow, so I wanted to have her babysit, because I had to go to work. "Wait a second I was kidding you can't date a 15 year old" "I'm kidding too Luke, I just want her to babysit." I think she has a small crush on me, so she'll do it for free I thought. Erika woke up around 7, when Luke and I were making dinner. Nothing fancy, Luke and I usually live on mac and cheese. Erika still delighted in it though. Luke did the usual dinner discussion, animu, video games, work, stuff Erika would have no idea about. I tried to include her in the conversation, getting the notebook and asking her some questions. Nothing heavy, just general stuff. She wants to be a vet when she grows up, usual kid stuff. Since she liked dogs, I told her she should play with Kaji. She hadn't known the whole time that Kaji was even in our apartment, since he's a quiet dog (which is why we're allowed to keep him). She played fetch with Kaji using a rope like toy, but he got pretty tired after about the second or third throw. He's a chunky lazy fellow (like master like dog?). He just sat on the couch with her as she pet him, enjoying the attention.
Post 8

Eventually we found out she liked checkers, and had memorized the layout to the board to play. She wrote that her dad taught her, and this made her a bit sad to think about it. I cheered her up by pulling out a board, and we played. She totally beat me. When I had one piece left, she feeled the board for where it was. She smiled when she found it, and jumped it. We turn one color all the king side, so she can differentiate between the two colors. Luke was a bit more of a challenge for her, all of those strategy RPGs he plays must enhance his board game skills. He ended up beating her twice, but she seemed to enjoy the challenge. She wrote that she'd beat him next time and gave him the finger across the throat death motion. In the meantime, I went to call Megan, who offered her services pro bono. We watched a bit more tv, Luke was in his room working on his "novel" (that boy aint right). I went to shower, and then I bathed her again. She didn't need my help as much as last time, I can imagine she was getting used to the layout of my place. Kaji came in while she was bathing to drink some water out of the toilet. He also took the time to sniff my butt, which amused Erika when I told her what he was doing. I let her dry herself off, and fetched another pair of boxers and a t-shirt for her to put on. Tomorrow I get payed, and I'm going to go buy her some clothes and some sort of gift. I carried her to my bedroom, and laid her down. I stroked her forehead a bit, then said goodnight to her. I'm now at my desk, She's now sleeping again on my bed, drooling again. She's been tossing and turning every so often, possibly having nightmares. So /b/, now you can tell me I'm a moron and I'm going to jail and I'm going to get raped. Or say stick it in the pooper. Also, give me gift and clothing ideas.
Thread 3

Posts made on the third day
06/22/07(Fri)23:25:01 No.30692587

Hullo /b/, it's the faggot with the blind mute girl nobody cares about back with thread numero tres. Threads 1 and 2 are at http://shii.org/knows/Blindmute_Loli . I had to go to work today, so I set my alarm clock. It went off, and I woke up. Erika's (who was laying next to me on the bed, no there was no pooper sticking or any other sticking that occurred) hand was on my face like some sort of death grip. I pulled it off, and she woke up. I told her to go back to sleep, and that I had to head off to work. She rolled back over, and I went into the shower. Luke was already gone for work, going in early or something, so I just got ready and went. I called Megan who said she was on her way and I told her the key to the apartment was under the doormat. Then I went to my job, and well, worked. Nothing special. I got off work, and headed to my next destination. I was going to buy Erika some sort of gift, I had pretty much already decided on a stuffed animal, and then clothes since wearing mine forever wasn't good. I bought her a nice teddy bear, usual brown cute little guy you get. Then I bought her some clothes, which was sort of an odd experience. Because buying her clothes included underwear, and a guy my age buying little girl's underwear seemed a bit pervy. I bought her some jeans and some skirts, not really knowing what she liked (no schoolgirl outfits). Then I bought her a few shirts. I don't really think she'll be too picky about her dress though, since she can't even see it. Not that blind people like to dress like morons.
06/22/07(Fri)23:25:16 No.30692599

I come home, and Luke is already out on his date. Megan is with Erika, and apparently they've been doing the usual "girl" stuff. Erika has makeup on, and Megan did her hair or something. At least Megan managed to keep the girl alive. I made sure Erika was fed, and then asked to talk to her privately in the kitchen. Now obviously I can't keep this girl forever illegally, or for very much longer at all. So I discuss with her the situation. It's hard to explain to a kid legal things, but I tried my best. I told her that I have to call child services tomorrow, and that she'll have to go back to a children's home. I asked her if she wanted to perhaps be adopted by me, making me her "daddy", and she agreed. She started crying when I told her that to officially do that I would have to send her back for a bit. I told her I could to jail, that I wanted to keep her but I couldn't just yet, and that I'd try to complete all of the stuff to adopt her as soon as possible. Then I made her promise she wouldn't try to run away from anywhere she goes again, and that I'd visit her whenever I could. It actually went better than I thought, and she really wasn't mad at me. And if all goes well I could be adopting her as soon as that's possible. To cheer her up, I showed her all of the clothes and the gift I bought her. She tried them all on, showing Megan and I what they looked like. That made her a bit happier, I think even she still likes looking good even if she can't really know what it means to "look" good. She also liked the bear, she's been clutching it since I gave it to her. I hoped that where she goes next she'll be able to keep me on her mind with it.
06/22/07(Fri)23:25:23 No.30692605

At this point I ask Megan when her ride is coming to pick her up. And then she informs that nobody's coming. "...What?" I could instantly tell something malicious was going on here. Megan apparently called her mother and told her that she was sleeping at a friend's house. I would drive her home myself, but Luke took our only car for his date, and he won't be home until late. So that puts me in a precarious position. If I call her parents, that leaves them wondering why I would agree to let a 15 year old girl stay the night in the first place. Of course it may not be malicious, she just told me she wanted to have a little "slumber party" with Erika. I'm in my room with sleeping Erika, trying to avoid Megan who's watching tv. I'm planning on calling Child Services tomorrow. And I don't plan on doing any pooper sticking to Megan, getting convicted of statutory rape isn't the best way to up your prospects for adopting an 8 year old.
Thread 4
06/24/07(Sun)00:48:36 No.30802451

Hay it's blindemute loli guy back with more. First three threads can be found at http://shii.org/knows/Blindmute_Loli . Anyways, a recap of the events that took place last night after the events mentioned in the third thread. I played a little hide and seek with Megan, trying to avoid her, eventually taking my last refuge in Luke's room. At this point she stopped beating around the seductive bush and asked me specifically why I wouldn't fuck her. So I told her that I was trying to adopt Erika and that statuatory rape isn't a good idea. And while I'm doing this I'm backed into a corner like a cowering dog. She starts approaching me, and I'm thinking she doesn't care what I have to say. And that if she gets any closer I might just push her down on Luke's bed and take her right there (I'm weak-willed, but I try). Instead, she just gives me a small kiss on the cheek, and says "maybe some other time". Once she leaves to go back to bed, with one stroke I cum all over Luke's floor.
06/24/07(Sun)00:48:54 No.30802474

A little while later, Luke comes home. His date with Melinda went well, they had a great time, they got along, and he got her in bed. And once he was there... he couldn't get an erection. Poor Luke. Anyways, that's all that happened last night, all of which Erika slept peacefully through holding her bear. I went to sleep late again last night, having no work. And it seemed like instantly after I fell asleep on the couch I was getting woken up by somebody. And once again, it was way too fukken early. Somebody was on top of me, none other than Megan. I opened my eyes and looked up at her. She wasn't really making me horny, I was more groggy and annoyed. "Didn't we discuss this already Megan?" "I'm just making sure you wake up to drive me home before my parents do." Greeat. So I got up and she got dressed and I drove her home. In the car I asked her what her birthday was. August 1st. For you see, Megan is now 15. In Ohio, the AOC (Age of Consent) is 16. You see where I'm going with this.
06/24/07(Sun)00:49:23 No.30802530

I had more important matters to handle today though. I didn't bother going back to sleep, and Erika woke up. She wasn't very happy, as she knew today I was going to call Child Services. I made her some breakfast and tried to cheer her up, but it wasn't really working up. I woke Luke up, at which point I had to explain the large semen stain on his floor. His only comment was, "Nice." He said he had to go to see Melinda about something though, so he couldn't help me clean the house. I wanted to make sure it was presentable if somebody from Child Services came to pick Erika up. So while she listened to the TV, I went around and cleaned the house. Took down some of Luke's more embarrassing and/or obscene collectibles, and did some general cleaning. About mid-morning I finally called. They said they would come down to identify her and pick her up. I called Luke and told him it would be nice if he could interrupt his date with Melinda to come back to the apt. so he could be here when child services came, being that he would be the adoptive father of Erika for now (I'm not old enough to apply for adoption, I'm only 19).
06/24/07(Sun)00:49:37 No.30802549

A nice looking (and I don't mean pretty, I mean she looked like she would be a generally kind person) lady showed up and identified that it was indeed the same Erika that they were looking for. They discussed with us what transpired, and surprisingly I didn't really get much reprimanding for keeping her as long as I did. She actually thanked me for taking care of Erika. Erika was uncomfortable, she sat as close to me as she could on the couch like nobody would take her away if she sat close enough. I told her I (or rather Luke) wanted to possibly adopt Erika. And then at this point Luke chimed in we're in the process of moving. So I'm thinking Luke's a fucking moron and that lying isn't going to help our cause. He tells the lady that we're in the process of moving into a large house with another occupant, that occupant being Melinda. I have no idea what he's talking about. The lady (Sharon was her name) told us our situation. She said that for the moment Erika would have to go back into state custody. However, being that Erika has expressed a strong interest in remaining with us, the lack of interest in her from other potential adopters, and the fact that Luke is old enough would make us potential candidates for adoption. She said that we could also possibly gain temporary custody over Erika while they made the decision, however the following conditions would have to be met.
06/24/07(Sun)00:49:55 No.30802568

They would have to preform background checks on Luke, myself, and Melinda to make sure neither of us were felons or had a history (and I know Luke and I are clean, I hope Melinda is). Then an agent would have to come by and evaluate the living conditions to make sure they were appropriate. She said the process could take anywhere from 72 hours to 1 or 2 weeks (my skepticism made me think this estimate might be overly gracious though). And then, she could be released to us if everything was okay until they made a more official decision, at which point she would legally become Luke's daughter. So yeah, I didn't get fucked over. I think sometime we forget that "the system" is composed of people just like you who in actuality do care about kids. So Erika had to go back to a children's home, which didn't please her at all. I could tell she was on the brink of some sort of tantrum, so I calmed her down. She had tears in her eyes. I gave her a nice big hug, and told her that I would come see where she was staying and that soon she would probably end up back with us. Then I told her to promise me she wouldn't try to run away or anything again, which she agreed to. It really made me sad to see her go, I had tears forming in my eyes which was a rare occasion. But, she had to leave, however at least she would possibly be back soon. She was allowed to keep the stuff we bought her, the clothes and the bear. As she left Sharon said she'd put in a good word for us. Go Sharon!
06/24/07(Sun)00:50:17 No.30802609

Anyways, after she left I had to have a little talk with Luke about what he had told Sharon. Luke informed me that last night on his date with Melinda he had told her about Erika, and Melinda offered to let us move into her house. Apparently she has a big house she inherited, not a mansion but nothing to scoff at. I asked Luke why she would offer to let a guy she's gone on like maybe 10 dates with and his adoptive daughter move in with her. And he replied, "Out of the goodness of her heart, just like you did" That made sense. And the benefits he outlined to me were pretty clear. We'd save tons of money on rent, we'd have an actual bedroom for Erika, more space, it seemed almost too perfect. But Luke says there's no catch to it. That's what he left to discuss with her. I resisted the urge to mention his little bedroom failure. I asked him when we should move, and he said ASAP. He wanted us to just pack up our shit and go, tonight. Obviously there was stuff we had to do before though, like telling our landlord and stuff like that.
06/24/07(Sun)00:50:40 No.30802644

We did however drive over to the place. It's a really nice house, most of the bedrooms are vacant since she's the only one that lives there currently. I'm highly considering the proposition, there's not really any downsides except it's a bit farther out of the way from my work and stuff.
Thread 5

(After many fake threads)
06/25/07(Mon)00:46:00 No.30904188

Hay guys, it's blindmute loli guy (now with 80% less loli joey bishop) back for the real fifth thread (nice try wikichan impersonator guy). And as you're probably expecting from this next sentence, I'm going to say go read http://shii.org/knows/Blindmute_Loli since the last 4 threads are on there. Last time on Dragon Ball Z, Goku was tested positive for syphilis. The DNA tests came back, and Krillin is Android 18's baby daddy. Except she's an android, what's up with that? Okay now let's get down to serious business. I woke up today, yadda yadda, I did stuff, let's get to the important stuff.
06/25/07(Mon)00:46:59 No.30904267

I visited Erika in the children's home where she's at, and talked to her a bit. I could see she still had her bear. I asked her questions, seeing if anybody was giving her a hard time, how she's doing (sadly even if she is doing bad there's not much I can do as of now). I gave her a little hint that if any boys are bullying her, she should kick them in a "special place". Okay, that's probably not responsible advice to give a child who might take it seriously, but if they give Erika any crap they deserve to get an ass whooping (or in this case testicle punt). I also gave her some candy I bought, I don't know what they get to eat in the home.
06/25/07(Mon)00:47:19 No.30904296

I also ran into Sharon again. Thinking of the person in the chat last night who (supposedly) works at CPS, I decided to talk with Sharon. "So honestly Sharon, truthfully, do I have any chance of winning custody of Erika?" And she replied, "Well to be perfectly honest, two young guys living in a small apartment adopting a young girl is very irregular. However, you said you were moving in with your friend's fiancรฉe soon who has a rather large house, right?" "Yeah, we should be moving in some time this week" "Then that completely changes the situation. I'd say that if your background check goes well you'd be okay" "What exactly do they check in those?" "Well criminal record, background, credit, they might interview neighbors and employers" (this is generally what the person last night who said they worked at CPS told me). And Sharon had this to say personally about the whole deal. "I really see no reason why you shouldn't get custody. Really, these homes aren't the best environments for children, but there's too many for every one to be adopted. And kids like Erika are usually the last picks, people don't want to take the time to communicate with a kid with her disabilities. I think you're doing a good thing."
06/25/07(Mon)00:47:56 No.30904355

My talk with her made me feel much better. Getting home, Luke and I began to pack to move. We were going to pack up all of the non-essentials we wouldn't need in the near future so we'll be ready to move sooner. It still feels odd, but it's such a good deal there's no way to turn it down. I drove some of it over, while Luke had something to do with Kaji that he needed to attend to. While there, I made conversation with Melinda. The subject invariably got on Luke, and she thinks highly of him. She kept on telling me how sweet and such he is. This is good, because if Luke and Melinda break it off the whole plan is ruined. I could almost feel though, like some sort of energy between us, that in the back of both of our mind's was Luke's little limpdick problem (Luke if you happen to read this I'm sorry lol). Then she asked me about my relationship life, which I told her was lacking. She said it's a shame, since I seem like a sweet guy, and cute too. Hey, can't disagree with her there (well I can but maybe she has some friends). Of course I'm going to be seeing Megan tomorrow at my job, which may be a bit odd for us. I hope we don't have sex on the stoves or something. Of course I wouldn't mind seeing grease all over Megan's ass... anyways, Melinda is all always friendly. I also asked her about her criminal record, which she found to be an odd question. But according to her there's nothing to be concerned about. Next time, Luke gives birth to a toy sailboat. Please look forward to it! ^_^
Thread 6
06/26/07(Tue)22:37:27 No.31098842

Hay all, it's blindmute loli guy here, back to fill the souls of /b/ with music. Anyways, as always you can go to the wikichan article (appropriately titled Blindmute Loli) to read up on the last 5 threads. It's been 2 days since I updated, having not made a thread on Monday. On Monday, nothing particularly exciting happened. I went to work, and Megan and I flirted the whole time trying not to let people notice. I really wanted to just bend her over the stove (turned on or not) and rape her sweet butt, but that has to wait until August. Of course if our boss noticed he'd be pissed that I'm going to hit his son's girlfriend. I also got her AIM, but she told me she didn't have a myspace (not that I have one). I thought she would be a myspace whore, hmm. We moved some more shit over to Melinda's to prepare for completing the move on Tuesday (which has been completed). I also visited Erika, and brought her sum moar candy. She expressed her usual sentiment of not wanting to be where she is, which is understandable. At least she's getting some schooling though, they have a program where a teacher comes for about an hour a day to teach (I think the reason his visits are so short is because he works for free or at a cheap rate, being charitable and such). She said she'd rather continue her "tiping" (I don't think she's had much computer use before meeting me) lessons, which surprised me since I thought they bored her. Sharon was there too again, but she said she had to run after giving me a quick hello. My boss also told me he was contacted by CPS, wanting to see what he thought about me (they dig pretty deep into your shit at CPS).
06/26/07(Tue)22:37:43 No.31098853

On Tuesday, we completed moving what was left of our stuff to Melinda's and have now began settling there. Some of us are more receptive to the change than others. Kaji, for instance, is a bit disturbed at the change of surroundings. One of the first things he did was take a green sickly looking shit on Melinda's carpet (which Luke had to clean). Speaking of Melinda though, I've been noticing some disturbing things. I have a feeling under her ncie exterior may be a neurotic crazy woman. Some observations:

1. When Kaji shit on the floor, she tried to be all nice and pass it off, but she looked like she was about to shit herself too. 2. She nicely informed me during dinner to please use a coaster, nicely as in she looked like she was going to end herself if she saw a ring on her table. 3. She carries hand sanitizer around, and uses it frequently.

Another thing, Melinda said tomorrow we were having a little get together with the neighbors, so Luke and I could meet with them. This isn't particularly bad, but I'm not a hugely social person. I'm just hoping I impress them, or at least appear "neighborly", because they'll be interviewed for the adoption process too. Melinda said, "My friends like cuties like you, maybe you'll meet somebody." On a side note, I still think Luke is having erectile dysfunction. Because I can tell when he's getting laid, he has a certain demeanor about him.
06/26/07(Tue)22:37:55 No.31098872

I also took time to go visit Erika again. I made Luke come with me, since he's going to be the legal father, he should be coming with. Erika didn't really particularly seem to care lol. Erika was in a bit of a grumpy mood, apparently she tried my "advice" I gave her and got in trouble. Some boy was bugging her, so she gave him a swift kick (I think she kicked his leg though, and missed the nuts). I then had to give her a speech on real bullying advice, and that she should just ignore them and they'll get bored. Is this good advice? Maybe, maybe not. But it seems like what Bill Cosby would've said. And then I gave Erika a present I bought for her to bring her, cheer her up. It's a necklace, she obviously couldn't see it but I think she liked it just because it was from me. And well it wouldn't hurt my situation if anybody saw me giving Erika these things, you know prove I'm not a broke bum. Sharon was there again (I'm wondering if she comes just at the time I usually visit...) and she talked to Luke and I. She mostly asked me questions, about my job and such. I wondered if the conversation was an official interview or off the record, CPS could be sneaky. So I'm now kicking it at my new residence. Even though it may be a bit too early, Luke and I want to begin painting a room for Erika. We have a bedroom which is already designated as hers, unoccupied. I'll ask her tomorrow what she would want. Of course that may be an odd question considering she's blind and doesn't really know what colors are. Surely painting would be better than a plain white room though. We also need to buy some furnishings for it. Some day a CPS agent should come by to examine the place, and we want it to look well lived in (right now Melinda has been living in it for a while, but a lot of the rooms look unexplored). Hopefully I'm on the fast track to adoption.
Thread 7
06/28/07(Thu)00:03:50 No.31216359

Okay /b/, it's blindmuteloli guy again who nobody cares about. And you can go to wikichan to read the last 5 entries and yadda yadda. Anyways, I'll get straight down to bidness. The adoption process is now getting fucked over big time. Okay, so as you may or may not know: Luke can't get it up. He's having problems wih his dick. So today he decided to see a doctor about it. He didn't tell me this specifically, but I knew. Every time we looked at each other, he knew I was thinking about his limp dick, like a soggy pancake flapping in the wind. This left me alone with Melinda, and we made small chat. But we both knew that Luke's soggy pancake was in the back of our minds. And eventually we could just almost feel it in the back of each other's heads. We both just burst out laughing, and we knew exactly what we were laughing about. And then we talked about it. She asked me about Luke's other gfs, if he had any problems. She said "Maybe I'm not pretty enough..." to which I just responded nicely to with "You're very pretty". I think she took it the wrong way though. "How about you, have you had any problems like that?" And then I felt it. The horror. Stiffening in my pants. Why was she asking me about my dick? Fuck fuck fuck fuck. "Uuuh...no"
06/28/07(Thu)00:05:41 No.31216524

And then she got up from her seat, and at that point it was all over. "Are you a virgin?" "Uuuh yeah" My voice was squeaking like a little schoolboy. She situationed herself in my lap, and my pants tent was already set up. I can't do this... I should do it... I can't do it... I want it..., my mind wasn't really thinking straight. And then my head exploded, I was no longer mild mannered OP. I was a MAN. And I was going to take this woman. I scooped her up and carried her straight up stairs. I slammed her down on the bed and just sort of pounced on her like a tiger. I fondled her tits, taking her shirt off and fondling them more through her bra while she just kept on stroking my dick. So wrong, so fucking wrong. But she needed somebody to pleasure her right? And then Emperor Boner spoke, "release the speeeeeerm!". My pants were already wet, and Melinda could feel it. "You really are a virgin." That statement enraged me, I was determined to fuck her brains out. Just as I had slipped my pants off though, I heard a noise. The door opening. Oh shit. It was Luke. We rushed like Sonic the Hedgehog to get our clothes on and looking normal. And then I darted back to my room. Melinda however, has been consistently dropping hints since. I know she wants to continue where she left off. So that's the problem. Melinda, who is the owner of the house I'm staying in for free wants me. If I don't offer myself to her, she could kick me out if she wanted to. And she's not that bad looking. When we got into bed, she turned into a different Melinda. She was like making growling noises at me, clawing at me. I could see now why she appealed to Luke, she is fukken crazy in bed.
06/28/07(Thu)00:05:54 No.31216545

But then there's the other side to the story. It's Luke's girlfriend. My best friend for a long time, the guy who let me stay with him in his apartment for a long ass time. Can I betray his trust? I mean, that's pretty bad of me. I know he can't get it up, I know Melinda has urges, but surely she can wait while Luke fixes his boner issues. And if Luke catches up, he's technically Erika's adoptive father. He could take her away and I'd never see her again. But if I don't follow Melinda's wishes, she could kick me out of the house and ruin my chances to see Erika too. So it's like either way, I'm fucked. My best bet is to fuck Melinda without getting caught, but that's morally wrong. I would never want to betray Luke like that. Anyways, in other news I visited Erika again today too, having Luke go with me. We talked to her for a bit, she was still wearing her necklace, usual stuff. I ran into Sharon again, who I've decided must come specifically when I do. She informed me that she was coming over to our house sometime this week to do an inspection. I didn't think that was her job, and she said it usually isn't but she specifically requested to do this one. I see she's really making an extra effort for my case, which is good. If that case isn't ruined by interpersonal conflicts. Also at work I think my boss is growing increasingly suspicious of Megan and me. He's giving us odd looks, which is mostly Megan's fault since she isn't very good at keeping secrets. It's really a shitty deal. I finally get chicks coming on to me, but at the worst possible time. Currently, I'm just in my room hiding from both Luke and Melinda who I think are (unsuccessfully) trying to have sex again. And I know who she's really thinking of. So /b/, what do I do?
Thread 8

Written speedily
06/28/07(Thu)18:42:20 No.31295408

Well /b/ it's me blindmute loli guy writing this as fast as possible. So let's just fucking jump right in. Started out as an average, day I went to work to go make my meager pay. But, no it wasn't average at all. I knew that the moment my boss called me privately into his office. And with his first sentence, I knew my job was over. "I know about your relationship with Megan." Great. Fucking great. He spared me the real reason though (the fact that Megan is his son's girlfriend). He gave me a big bullshit speech about how although my personal relationships are none of his business, employees having affairs with underaged employees reflects bad on the establishment and yadda yadda, and that's why he has to let me go. You know what I said? Absolutely fucking nothing. I couldn't say anything, like maybe if his son was more of a man his girl wouldn't be looking to put other men on the job. Couldn't muster up a middle finger, an "asshole" an anything. I just meekly said "okay" and walked out.
06/28/07(Thu)18:42:39 No.31295435

But you know what, I'm not an easily raged guy. It was cool. So I lost my job, so what? I'll find a new one. I'd like to think I'm better than working at a fast food place my whole life. On to bigger and better things right? And then I went to visit Erika, the brightness of my life. The one person I could always depend on to cheer me up. And that she did. So I went home in a better mood. And I was greeted by my friend Luke. "Hey buddy. You know I was on Wikichan the other day..." and at this point I knew shit was taking a turn for the worst. "...and I saw a story that looked surprisingly similar to ours. And apparently the guy also tried to fuck his best friend's girlfriend." At this point his tub of lard jiggly ass decided to punch me in the face. With that, I went crazy. I wasn't taking any more shit from anybody. It was Luke, it was my boss, it was anybody I've ever taken shit from without saying a word stretching back to being a kid. I pushed him down, grabbed a lamp off of the nearby table and began beating in the head with it. After a few hits, Luke's head was busted open and Melinda in tears pulled me off. She was taking Luke to the hospital, and told me to get the fuck out by the time she got back. So she's been gone, and I'm getting ready to go. You guys are the only friends I have anyways, so I thought I'd give you all a little closure.
06/28/07(Thu)18:42:59 No.31295462

So yeah, I'm fucked. What do I get? Nothing. I lose Erika, I lose my job, I lose my house, I lose my best friend, the first chance I've had to lose my virginity in well forever. And now I'm just a homeless bum with a laptop (which I'll probably have to sell for food) and a few clothes. What does Erika get? To stay in a children's home until she's 18, at which point she can be (literally) blindly thrusted into the adult world. Maybe she'll run away again, maybe she'll get kidnapped and raped by a pedophile. What can I do about it? I'm just the worthless piece of shit I've always been, except now I don't even have a job or a place to stay. By staying here and typing this I risk having Melinda call the cops on me so I can spend a nice night in jail, but you guys are the last people who give half of a shit about me so what the hell? I need to leave though, but let's just recap the final lesson learned here. Don't do anything nice for anybody. It'll just all blow up in your fucking face. I pick a girl off of the streets, give her food and a place to stay, try to be a nice guy. But no, I needed the system's approval. So I began jumping through hoops to appease the faggots at CPS and I ended up losing everything. Awesome world, huh?

07/01/07(Sun)22:12:22 No.31645058

Your fortune: You will meet a dark handsome stranger

Blindmute Loli: DEATH AND REBIRTH

Hay all, it's blindmute loli guy again, finally back (I know it hasn't been that long but whatever). Anyways, I'll just jump right in because I'm sure you all (as in the 8 or so people in the chat) want to know how I got back here. So yeah, as you know, Luke and I got into a fight (a fight still not ended), and I ended up homeless. I packed my shit up and left before Melinda and Luke got home, and nobody ended up calling the cops on me. Now I needed to solve the dilemna of having no place to stay. I had a bit of money, but not enough to afford a hotel or anything. The only thing I could think of doing is going back to my old boss, and begging for my job back. At least that way I could start making money so I wouldn't be homeless forever. I figured it would still be open if I hurried over there (I didn't realize how far it was on foot though). When I got there, my ex-boss was already gone. Well, there's always tomorrow. Just then I ran into Megan, who asked me what I was doing at work after being fired. And I spilled the whole story, Melinda and I, Luke, the lamp, the punching, and the fact that I was now homeless.
07/01/07(Sun)22:13:12 No.31645138

Your fortune: Outlook good

Megan was sympathetic towards my story, and had an idea. She said maybe she could convince her parents to let me stay at her place overnight. Well, hey, a homeless guy can't be picky, anything's worth a try, right? So her parents, who usually come to pick her up from work, arrived. Megan asked, I stood there trying to look as innocent and non-creepy as possible, and her father spoke thusly: "...No." And to seal the deal, it started raining. So now I'm just wandering around like some sort of crazy guy, soaked with a backpack full of essentially (at least in this situation) stuff, laptop and a few clothes. Maybe I'll catch pneumonia and die, I thought. What sort of weird fucked up karma is this? I take a homeless person in, and end up homeless because of it. Doesn't make much sense. After that, nothing really happened that night. I had absolutely no place to stay, and I didn't get one. I spent the whole night basically loitering around. I had no desire to sleep, and those of you in the chat know I stay up a bit late. Really I was just hoping I wouldn't get shot or stabbed or something. Before I knew it, the sun was coming up (it had stopped raining by then). My clothes were still fairly damp, but the sunrise seemed to make the mood a bit more cheery. It ws probably about 4 am then, when the sun usually rises.
07/01/07(Sun)22:13:26 No.31645154

Your fortune: Better not tell you now

I was determined to go visit Erika just like I always did, so I started off in the direction of the home. Now obviously it's not going to take me from 4 am til the mid afternoon (when I usually visit) to get there, but it never hurts to have an early start. I considered going to Luke and begging, but I decided against it. Even if he did let me back in, it'd still be incredibly awkward between Melinda and I. Time passed, with me walking, thinking. I didn't enjoy not having a home, but on the plus side this was probably the most I've been outside in a while. As more time passed, looking up at a clock I could see it was my time to visit Erika. I didn't know if I should tell her what happened or not. Maybe there are some things kids shouldn't know. I walked in, and there she was just as usual. I wanted to tell her the story, but throughout the visit I didn't have the heart to. I saw Sharon coming as usual though, and from the way she looked at me I had a feeling she knew what was up. "Luke cancelled the adoption process, what happened?" So, for the second time, I spilled the beans. I told her the whole sob story with the loss of job, the homelessness, the laptop. And that's when Sharon became my angel. She offered to let me stay at her place. So maybe karma wasn't so bad afterall. She lives in duplex, so her living space is larger than my old apartment but not as large as Melinda's.
07/01/07(Sun)22:13:43 No.31645183

Your fortune: Very Bad Luck

She drove me there, and the first thing I did was take a shower (I was pretty wet and dirty). Then she made me some food, as I was fairly hungry. I've been here since, and yes I could've returned sooner. I really just didn't feel like making an update, until today when I decided to write one. Sharon and I talked, and we both agreed that it's really unfair to Erika to have to stay in a home because of a fight between me and Luke. Sharon decided that she was going to try and adopt Erika. Now with her working at CPS, this presents an issue. I don't know if it works in her favor, or works against her, or whether it doesn't matter at all, but I'm hoping she wins it. She's got good prospects, she's a mature, responsible, woman. I don't really know where I'm going from here. Sharon seems to enjoy having me actually, and enjoy my company. We've become friends over the days I've been here (as opposed to the awkward friendliness of a potential adopter and a person who may have to tell you, "Sorry, you can't adopt her!"). I don't want to impose myself on her forever though. Of course if she adopts Erika I'm sure she'll let me visit, and I think she'll make a good mother. And that's what's happened while I've been gone. Things are slowly getting better, as they always do. Life has to beat you down a few times so it can bring you back up.
Thread 10
07/02/07(Mon)22:03:45 No.31731083

Hi /b/, it's blindmute loli guy, back again. Here's what happened today. I woke up, as I frequently like to. Except it was sometime in the afternoon, me being unemployed and all. It felt good not being on a schedule, but then I realized it was about an hour until I had to visit Erika. So I rushed to shower and be presentable to go visit her (not that she can see me, but I still gotta look good for her, or as good as I can look). While getting ready I also saw lots of Sharon's pantsu lying about. I had told the chat this last night, Sharon isn't really clean like Melinda. She's sort of messy, having clothes everywhere. I began to feel nostalgic, taking me back to my teen years when my sister's and cousin's drawers were my domain (keep in mind I'm only 19). And I sniffed, and I sniffed again, and it was good. I suppose it's sort of wrong to sniff the underwear of somebody kind enough to take you in, but I blame it on /b/ (and the chat which told me to). I arrived at the home, and Sharon was there. "When did you end up waking up?" "Like an hour ago" "Wow, talk about lazy. Get a job." Of course she didn't say this in a mean tone, just in a joking tone. Then she said "Luke came here today." Uh-oh. So from what I learned from her, Luke came here to tell her to tell me something. Apparently Luke had gotten a call from my parents (who probably still thought I was living with him, the last time I talked to them I gave them his cellphone number so he would have to deal with them). My little sister has been involved in a car accident. Now to describe the relationship between myself and my parents, it's strained. When I turned 18 I didn't immediately apply to any colleges (and I'll admit I was a slacker in high school, which is partly /b/'s fault when I was 17 and 18). So they decided to "help me out" and "teach me responsibility" by kicking me out. This is when I began living with Luke.
07/02/07(Mon)22:04:09 No.31731135

Of course I still like my sister, we have a pretty good relationship (we're the usual bickering siblings, but sometimes I end up being the (over)protective big brother). I really think I should visit her, and since I'm not working my schedule is less constricting. So I'm debating whether or not I'm going, if I did I'd probably drive there tomorrow and stay maybe for a day or two. She is my sister regardless of how I feel about my parents. And Sharon didn't actually specify what exactly happened. She got into a car accident, but I don't know if that means she's dead or in the hospital or what. I would assume she's not dead or they would've said so, I hope not anyways. Also she's not old enough to drive, which means she either stole my parents' car or got in a car with some rabble rouser (who I'll have to beat up later). I also have an older sister, I didn't know if she would be there. She's generally considered the "success" of the family, getting a scholarship to a good college, majoring in psychology. I don't dislike her for it though. On a more pleasant note though, Sharon told me that our current adoption process was going great. Since CPS has already done an extensive background check of me, and since Sharon works there, the whole process is going a lot faster. She told me that they would send an agent over as soon as next week and we could have Erika (on a trial basis that is) in that same week if all goes well.
07/02/07(Mon)22:07:52 No.31731532

I told that to Erika, who was overjoyed. I know that it's not always the best idea to get kids excited about things that may or may not happen, but since she's been in the home for a bit she's starting to really to dislike it again. So I had to give her something to be excited about. I also told her what happened between Luke and I (not the part about me and Melinda, just the part where we had a fight, omitting the graphic violence). She wrote that she likes Sharon (who's been keeping an eye on Erika for me), so it works out well. Then she asked me if Sharon and I are getting married. Sharon and I both laughed at that, and Sharon said "not at the moment". Sharon said she'll be back at the duplex later, and then with a hug from Erika, I was off. I had the whole day to myself after that. When I left Melinda's house, I grabbed everything I could fit in my backpack. So my DS was with me, but no Wii, 360, or any other console goodness. So I spent the day watching tv, took a nap (I'm excessively lazy when I have the time to be), and took a few more sniffs. It makes your heart beat when you clutch what you know you're not supposed to be touching. Took me back it did. Sharon eventually came home, and I greeted her with some dinner (dinner being easy shit I was capable of making with my limited culinary knowledge). I also cleaned up a bit in various places, trying not to seem totally useless. So we sat down to eat dinner, and I was reminded of something I wanted to ask her. "How did Luke look when you saw him?" "He had a head injury." I smirked at that. Luke probably didn't deserve to get his head bashed in, I didn't deserve to get kicked out, and it's a regrettable incident but it still feels good to win a fight.
07/02/07(Mon)22:08:13 No.31731578

And now I'm here, taking a left after I simply walked through Mordor and stopped in Bat Country for some coffee. I'll try to go into the chat tomorrow to let you guys know whether I'm going to visit my sister or not, but if you don't see me tomorrow you'll know I went and you can expect me to be back in a few days.
Thread 11

Note: Post 2 is something the OP made while he was bored when writing. It's not real, and was not posted on 4chan, only shown to those in the AIM chat. If you want only what happened, skip it.
07/05/07(Thu)05:38:23 No.31991506

Okay all, blindmute loli guy is here again. As you know, I went to visit my sister since she had an accident. I left the day after my last post, and arrived in town. I called my parents, who gave me the address to the hospital. Previous chapters on wikichan, front page.
Post 2 (joke)

When I arrived, I was stopped by a mysterious woman. She was rather well "endowed" if you catch my drift, and dressed in what looked like to be some sort of military outfit. Now I was getting a bit worried. Was I getting vanned? "Your sister isn't at the hospital." The fuck!? Was this some sort of nefarious plot against me? "Don't be alarmed though, I'm taking you to where your father works, that's where she is." We continued driving, until we came to a very large building. Looked like some military institution. I didn't know what to make of the whole situation. We went inside, and were greeted by large doors. The woman pulled out a card, and swiped it through a panel in front of one of the doors, opening it and leading us inside. "This is where my father works!?" I couldn't believe it, it was like the FBI or the CIA. "Do you know what your father does?" I had no idea. We went to a large escalator, the wind causing the woman's dress to blow up and revealing her panties. "I'd rather not wear a skirt in this place." We stopped off the escalator and landed in front of an elevator. When it opened, we ran into a friend of the woman's. She was another woman, in scuba attire. The woman and her began discussing, as we moved further to our destination. As they discussed me, they called me by a name that was confusing. It wasn't my name, it sounded like some designation of importance. But I hadn't even been to this place before! They discussed some sort of weapon too, I had no idea what sort of babble they were spitting. I just stood there. After that, we went in an aquatic vehicle, riding on the surface of this purplish liquid. When we arrived in a room, the lights were off and it was pitch black. They turned them on, and right before me, was the most "what the fuck" thing ever. A large like robotic humanoid thing, I don't even know how to describe it, looking right at me. It was purple, with green on it, a large horn atop its head. At this point I thought that I must be dreaming. I gasped, "A face... a gigantic robot..." "Did my father build this?" Suddenly, "that's right!" I looked up, and saw none other than my father in a nearby window. "Been a while, hasn't it?" "Father..." My father said, "Move out!" The woman protested, "Move out!? You mean you're activating this unit?" The other woman spoke, "We have no choice." "But... Emily can't pilot it!" Emily!? That was my sister? PILOT!? She's been piloting these things!? "We have no pilots!" "One has just arrived..." "...!" ME!? "Jake..." "...Yes?" "...you will pilot it." "But it took Emily 7 months to synchronize with her unit! He just got here, it's impossible!" The woman turned to me. "Just take a seat, that's all we expect of you." I spoke. "Father, why did you call me?" "For exactly the reason you think..." "Do you mean I have to pilot this!?" "Of course." "No way! Why are you saying this!? I thought you didn't need me!" "I only called you because I need you now." "I can't do it! I've neither seen it nor heard of it! How can I do it?" "Listen to her explanation." "No, I can't do it! It's impossible..." "If you're getting in, stop wasting time! If you're not, go home!" Right after his statement there was a large explosion outside. My father said, "Damnit, the bastard has found us..." "Jake, there's no time! Please get in!" "No way, it's ridiculous!" "Jake, don't run away from your father, don't run away from yourself." "I know... but I don't think I can do it!" My father spoke to another person. "Wake up Emily." "Is she available?" "Well, she isn't dead." My sister came out, looking terrible. She had injuries all over her, something over her eye, a cast. I couldn't stand to see her like this. "Emily, the back-up turned out to be useless. Try again." ...Okay I'm going to end this Evangelion parody before you all hate me forever.
07/05/07(Thu)05:38:36 No.31991531 (Where real story continues)

Anyways, here's what happened. I got the address, went to the hospital. When I arrived, a nurse led me to the room of my sister. She was in bed, awake, and my parents were on each side of their bed. This was going to be an awkward situation. I hadn't seen my parents in a while, since they kicked me out. They gave me a cold sounding "Hi son" and I gave them an equally cold "Hi mom and dad". And a much more enthusiastic, "Hi sis, how are you feeling?" She smiled, she sounded a bit weak but said "Hi brother." My parents excused themselves from the room, and left us alone. I asked her what had happened, and it's just what I thought. She was at a party, needed a ride home, and got into the car with some drunken guy who crashed into another vehicle. They were both injured, and that's how she got here. I began to give her the big old speech about how could she get in the car with some drunk guy and yadda yadda. Then I realized she's probably already been lectured to death by mom and dad, so I stopped and just said "I'm glad you're okay." I grabbed her hand, and began stroking her forehead a bit. We started talking about what we had been up to. She asked me about my life, and I told her about Erika and what was going on. She seemed really surprised that I was actually doing something (lol everyone in my family expects me to be a huge failure). "So how about that Sharon, are you two dating?" "Well it's sort of complicated..." "When we were kids, I used to have a little crush on you." Then she started talking about some of the times I've protected her (I'm not mr. muscles, but I can totally beat up kids that are like 5 years younger than me). Even though her and I didn't always get along, I still took on the role of the protective big brother.
07/05/07(Thu)05:38:46 No.31991552

And since I know you all have perverted brains, and you're thinking "incest incoming", I'll say this now that there is no forthcoming incest. Zip up your pants, anonymous. Anyways, we both laughed at all of the old stories. I asked her what happened to a few of them, most of them were still here. I asked her what she was up to. She said she's been working on getting her grades up (I don't know if I habeeb, considering she's sitting in a hospital for being at a party). And she's got no boyfriend (but no, you guys can't date her). "Did Amelia (older sister) come yet?" "Nope, not yet." Amelia is the older sister, the "success" I mentioned earlier. She's probably too busy with her shit to visit. Bitch (my sister and I have never really had a good relationship, me being the younger brother she liked to mess with). My parents came back in. "We're going to head back to the house Emily. Jake, you're welcome to stay with us." So I went with them. When we arrived at home, we all sat down to have a little dinner, for the first time in a long time (even when I was a kid, we usually all never sat down to eat together). They asked me how stuff was going, and I told them the same thing I told my sister. And they actually said they were proud of me. So yeah, my parents don't think I'm a failure any more, of course on the negative side they their little "lesson" of kicking me out worked. I gave them the number to Sharon's place if they ever needed to call me. They said I should marry her.
07/05/07(Thu)05:39:12 No.31991589

While I've been here, I've been visiting my sister every day, usually with my parents though I always stay a bit longer than they do. Usually just talk, play some cards, and to reiterate, no incest. But, my visit must come to an end. I'm leaving tomorrow, and I'll be back at Sharon's place. I know Erika's probably missing me.
Thread 12
07/06/07(Fri)06:14:26 No.32107516

Okay /b/, it's blindmute loli guy, prepare the sage beams. Today I had to bid my sister a fond farewell. I went to her hospital room with my parents, gave her a hug, kiss on the cheek, and told her to get well soon and that I might come to visit more often now (like for Christmas). They all wished me luck with the adoption, and my parents said that if I needed any help I could ask them. That really contradicts their whole idea of kicking me out, but okay. So I was off, and back to Sharon's duplex. When I arrived, all of the lights were off. It was sort of creepy, since I was expecting somebody to welcome me. Then I heard small footsteps. An intruder?! Just had to get to that light switch... but then I felt a hand on me. OH GOD I WAS GOING TO DIE PAINFULLY... wait, I know that hand. Small, delicate, little hand. Sharon flipped the lights on, and it was just who you think. Little Erika standing before me, still in one of the outfits I bought her, still wearing her necklace, even holding the bear. At seeing her, I couldn't help but giving her a big enough hug to almost pop her head off. "Isn't this a bit early Sharon?" "Well CPS works in strange ways, believe me." So we have at the moment temporary custody. The main rule of it is that we have to inform CPS if we want to take Erika out of state, and get their approval. Once we fully adopt her hopefully they'll leave us alone (well I'm sure they have little checkup visits every now and then).
07/06/07(Fri)06:14:38 No.32107523

Sharon had a large celebratory dinner prepared, and despite being a lousy housekeeper Sharon is an excellent cook. Erika was delighted to have it, it probably being the best thing she's had in a while. We had some dinnertime conversation, with Erika asking (asking, telling, and saying for Erika again being writing on her notebook incase anbody forgot) me how my sister visit went. I told her about it, that my parents made up and all was well. She said yes to me asking her if she'd like to visit some time. After we finished, Sharon presented a gift to Erika (try to one-up me will she!?). It was a checkers board. I remember mentioning to Sharon that Erika likes checkers. Erika and Sharon played, and Erika destroyed Sharon (I don't think checkers is her game). I fared a little bit better against her, but still lost. I thought that maybe some day I'd like to teach her to play chess. The only problem is, I'd have to learn how to play it myself. I'm certainly not betting on Sharon knowing. After the checkers were over, Sharon went to her room and Erika and I settled on the couch. She cuddled right up against me and we watched some tv. She lifted her head curiously at me when I started singing the fresh prince theme at the beginning of the show (something I do occasionally when thinking of /b/), but then she started tapping her foot to it.
07/06/07(Fri)06:14:47 No.32107534

Eventually, I could tell she was getting tired so I lifted her up to take her to the bathroom. Sharon didn't seem to have a problem with me bathing Erika, not that she should. So I made her all squeaky clean, and wrapped her up in a towel to dry off. While she was standing in front of me wrapped up she reached forward and gave me a little kiss on the nose. So I had to do it. It was the perfect Full House moment, had to pull out my secret weapon of cutseyness: the zrbtt, blowing a raspberry (not to be confused with popping a cherry), bronx cheer, whatever you want to call it. Gave her on the cheek, which she smiled at. She wiped it off of her cheek and I finished drying her off. It was at this point I realized I still didn't have any nightime clothing for her. D'oh. So I put her in one of my t-shirts again and she was off to bed. I kissed her on the forehead and said goodnight, but she tugged on my shirt. She patted the bed beside her like she wanted me to get in, so I did. She cuddled right up under my arm. I asked her what the bear's name was. She said it was Sherman. So she layed there with my arm around her should and eventually fell asleep (and I drifted off for a bit too). Now, there's still one more issue. Erika's birthday is next Saturday, July the 14th. Since she's home, I need to give her the best birthday party evar. I need to get some presents, some guests, uuuh cake and stuff. Any ideas? As for the guests, I was thinking of inviting the people that live in the other side of the duplex. Sharon says they're a nice little family, and I never really hear a peep out of them. I could also ask Erika if maybe she had any friends from her children's home (though I'm not betting on it) that she would want to invite.
Thread 13
07/08/07(Sun)07:49:00 No.32316404

Salutations /b/, it's blindmute loli guy, back with 3 new flavors of syphillis (be sure to try mango tango berry) for your computer screen. Well then, today (or yesterday as it more accurately is since it's late/early in the morning as I'm writing this) I had a few tasks in mind. Those tasks were as follows:

1. Invite the neighbors to Erika's birthday party 2. Ask Sharon on a date (yes, today was the day I was going to do it) 3. Fill out job application for nearby food place
07/08/07(Sun)07:49:19 No.32316423

And I intended to start, in that order. But later. So Erika woke up a bit after me, I made breakfast. We ate, and then she asked me to play some checkers against her. Which means she just wanted someone to beat horribly. But I would not lose! No way. The tension mounted as I got out the board and set the pieces in place. I was going to go first. Needed a good strategy, something I haven't done before. So I moved a piece forward. She moved hers. Then I moved a piece behind the first one forward. It occured to me! I had to keep my little checker soldier pieces together, like a unit. A pack of wolves ready to pounce on all unsuspecting sheep. I'll get her! She moved forward again. Again I moved. Back and forth the checkers flew. ACK! She got me. One of my pieces, rushing too quickly into enemy territory, drawn in by the promise of kinghood, struck down by her cruel black men. She stuck her tongue out as she jumped me. Oh, cruel mistress, she loves to strike my men down. I moved, she moved, I moved, she moved, one by one I saw my soldiers face death. Bravely those that survived marched on. One of them reached the end, the promise land, to ascend and become a king. But this brave and noble king wouldn't sit back where he was safe, he trudged back into the fray. Only to be shot down. The odds became overwhelming. My men were scarce, her vast black empire stretched over the board. They still continued to wage war valiantly, taking out a few of the black devils here and there, but all of them fell. The war was over, it was time for me to raise my white flag (is any of this making checkers more exciting?). She may have won, but I asked her if she could see me do "this". Erika of course couldn't see me do whatever it was I was about to do which would surely make me uneasy. She doesn't know though that they used to call me General Ticklefingers. And tickle I did.
07/08/07(Sun)07:49:54 No.32316463

After the tickling quotient had been fulfilled, I decided it was late enough to go over to the neighbor's and invite them. Ring the doorbell I did, and greeted by a man I was. He seemed like the average guy, the kind in the commercials, the one who watches "the game" with a beer in his hand and goes to a crappy job every day and is a raging alcoholic but denies it. "Uh hi I live in the other side of the duplex." "Hi there! My name's James Wall but you can call me Jim." So I tell Jim my name, and he invites me in, so we take a sit down on the couch, his beer belly jiggling a bit as he takes a seat. "So, how about a beer?" "I'm not old enough to drink Jim" (yes I know that makes me sound like a huge fag, but whatever). And for the record I'm not some sort of straight edge. Anyways, back to Jim, who said "Oh then how about a poparoosky?" (yes he actually said "aroosky", but I'm used to odd vocal mannerisms from living with Luke). On another side note, everybody here says pop and I hate it. It's SODA. Jim got me some *soda* and we sat down on the couch to chat a bit. He asked me about Sharon and I. At that point I thought that hopefully by the end of the day Sharon and I would be more than just friends. He asked me about my job, didn't have one. After the general chit chat was done, I invited Jim and his family to the party. "Sure, me and the famarooni (family - ily + rooni = famarooni) would be happy to come. Why don't you meet them before you go?"
07/08/07(Sun)07:50:04 No.32316472

So he called his kids down. There was Melanie, a 12 year old girl. Amelia, a 6 year old girl. And finally Eric, a 15 year old. Eric, or girlpants as I like to call him, was the stereotypical emo kid. Dyed black hair in that little flippy thing, girlpants, a band t-shirt for some crappy emo band. Overall, a pretty average american family. His wife, Cynthia, was missing so I would have to be meet her at another time. So the guest list for Erika's party is now:

Erika (of course) Me Sharon Jim(arooskyrooni) Melanie Amelia Eric Cynthia
07/08/07(Sun)07:50:19 No.32316490

As I returned home (I told Erika I was going shopping, but it was actually Sharon who went shopping), I knew Sharon would soon return. Erika asked me where the groceries were, looking for some chips to eat. "Uuuh they were closed." So I waited for Sharon to return home, and she did, with various food stuffs. Erika didn't question my super knowledge, just happily munched on her chips. I went to share the good news with Sharon, that I had invited the neighbors. She gave me a sarcastic "great". "What's wrong with them?" "Jim is the most annoying man in the world!" Oops, I guess I should've asked Sharon before I invited these people into her house. Jim seemed nice enough to me, but I see how he could press on your nerves if you're around him too long. I called Sharon into the other room, wanting to speak to her alone. Erika, being curious as any 8 year old would tried to sneak her way into the room but she was foiled as she didn't really know the layout of Sharon's place that much yet. "So Sharon, we've been friends for a bit now..." I was starting to get nervous. Can't get nervous. When you get nervous, you mess up. Had to stay cool, calm and cool. Deep breath, skip the beating around the bush. So I popped the question, asking her on a date. "Well you're really nice but..." and then I got it. The "you're really nice but" speech. Mission Failed. Snake!? Snake get up! Snaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaake! Well I was a bit disappointed, and could only hope that didn't make things totally awkward between us. Sharon also had a message for me. She said Luke asked me to come to Melinda's place tomorrow. What does he want? Well I'll find out later today.
07/08/07(Sun)07:50:32 No.32316501

As for my third task, not much going on there. I got the application, began filling it out. There is another problem though that relates to my old job: Megan. I haven't mentioned her much, but she's been sort of stalking me. We exchanged aim sns, so whenever I sign on she's been stalking me. I really don't think I want to pursue any relations with her, as she got me in so much trouble before, but she won't give up. She still thinks that in August I'm going to take her virginity. I'm doubting whether that's the best idea. I did get turned down by Sharon though, maybe I shouldn't look a gift horse in the mouth? It's not like the cosmic forces of the universe send you hot girls wanting your penis every day, and she's only about 3 years younger (since she's almost 16). As long as she's not involved with the son of my new boss... So that's what happened today. I completed 2/3 tasks, which is 66%. An F, but I'm used to those from high school. I'm pretty disappointed about Sharon, which is why I really need to get a job. If she has no romantic interest in me then she has no reason to keep me around for free. I should probably start paying her rent if I want to make an extended stay.
Thread 14
07/09/07(Mon)00:12:26 No.32386120

I'm blindmuteloli guy and insert a witty non-sequitur here. Today I arose from my slumber, and was greeted by Erika who had felt her way around into my room. I put her under arrest for trespassing and carried her to the kitchen. Putting her down, I prepared some foodz to be enjoyed and began the day. Once again, being the unemployed lump I am, I had nothing to do. I settled down with Erika on the couch, and was playing EBA. Erika inquired about the music I was listening to, so I told her it was a music game. She wanted to play, but obviously her blindness presents a problem in that regard. Of course I knew Erika wouldn't like that answer. So getting another one of my clever ideas, I went to the first stage on Breezin'. I took Erika's hand, it grasping a stylus, and completed the level by leading her hands to tap the beats. Possibly she could memorize the timing and the position on the screen. After one time through, I had her try it herself. She failed miserably. Luckily, she lost interest in it after that before I made an extended dedication to teaching her (Sorry no video game playing loli here, try damaged goods). That did get me interested in wondering if there were any games specifically made for blind people, which there are. Maybe I would have Erika play some sometime. She wanted to again pwn me at checkers. I decided to make up a new rule. If she wanted to jump one of my pieces, she had to type a word on my keyboard. Good way to tie in learning with fun, or cheap way to try and beat an 8 year old girl at checkers, you decide. But I still lost, it was at least closer this time though. Eventually I was going to teach her some other board games though.
07/09/07(Mon)00:13:28 No.32386210

In other business though, I was planning on going to see Luke today. Sharon was going to be home soon, so once she was I was going to head to Melinda's. When Sharon did return, I had a bit of business to discuss with her. "So Sharon, what's the situation with you and me?" I know she had already turned me down yesterday, but I want to know where I stand. From this convo, I learned she actually has a boyfriend. The reason I haven't heard anything of him until now is because they haven't spoken in a while after her boyfriend (Mark) cheated on her. But now he's "changed" and they're starting to make up. As for my situation, Sharon said that I was a good "stay-at-home mom" for Erika. She refused rent from me, but I still can't be a bum at her house forever. Well anyways, I made my way over to Luke's. To put it quite simply, apologies were made. Luke apologized for overreacting. I apologized for kicking Luke's ass (and boy did he have a mark, sorry Luke if you're reading this). Melinda apologized for trying to seduce me. ...And Luke still can't get it up (sorry again if you're reading Luke). This, of course, is good because well it's better to have friends than enemies. Luke also surrendered the Wii to me being as I like it more than he does, he refused to budge on the 360 though. I did stay to play some quick Smackdown vs. Raw matches, laced with animu discussion. Normal stuff for us. It'll take a lot more than a girl to undo our friendship.
07/09/07(Mon)00:14:03 No.32386262

Returning home, Erika was fiddling around with my DS (she was on the options screen of EBA, and I don't think she had any idea what she was doing). I informed her of my wikipedia-fueled findings about blind video games. Through the google I managed to find some freeware titles targeted to blind games, usually basic stuff like solitaire. Her keyboard knowledge and such however wasn't up to task to play any of them well yet. That's when the phone began ringing. Picking it up... a stranger. "Hello" HOLD IT! I know that stranger's voice. Megan, jinkies! Megan looked up my number. Now when I said she was stalking me in my last post I was semi-joking but now it's getting a bit odd. Of course I should probably just go with it, any logical person would do that. In the back of my mind it still feels like a bad idea though. I also went out again to buy some things for Erika's party. No gift yet, I'm still racking my brain for the perfect thing. I did buy some decorations and stuff though. A surprise party would work out nicely, no? We go out to somewhere, we return home, people yell "surprise", usual affair. I also bought her some new clothes, including some pajamas (with ducks).
07/09/07(Mon)00:14:12 No.32386279

So that's what happened today, however I would like to discuss in this last paragraph that my updates are going to be become more infrequent. The main reasons being is that, as a replier to my thread said last night, this is becoming like some sort of blog for me. And I'll be damned if I ever have a blog. Even though I have Erika, that doesn't necessarily mean every day of mine is noteworthy. This doesn't mean I'm going to become as infrequent as say Nurse-kun however don't expect an update every day. I'll still probably go in the chat when I have time, and give them small updates since they seem to be the real people that care. The next time I'll give an update is probably on the 14th, the day of Erika's birthday bashtravaganza (that's a 2 dollar word and I just made it up). Not like this is the end, just no daily updates any more.
Thread 15
07/13/07(Fri)00:56:36 No.32797126

It's blindmuteloliguy again, back (IN POG FORM). I know I said I wouldn't be back til Saturday, but I decided to make a thread tonight since stuff has been happening. First thing, I got a job. Once again, not glamorous, another restaurant job. My new boss isn't as cool as my old one (as in we have to actually work instead of just playing the arcade machines) but it's still a job, and a job is a job. Now this is where a problem comes in. I needed a babysitter. For the first day, I requested Luke to help me out. It seemed like a good arrangement, until I got home. Everything was fine, the apartment in perfect form, except one of Erika's pair of underwear was missing. No I'm not some sort of pedo, I just know what she has because I bought them and she doesn't have tons. And one of them has become MIA, right after Luke babysat... You see where I'm going with this. Now I know Luke's a bit of a lolicon, I've seen his mangas, but I never thought he would do something like this. As of yet though, I have no solid proof to call him on. I've been trying to infiltrate his room when I go over to his house, to retrieve the panties. If he finds they're gone, he'll know I know. Someone else also suggested I set up some cheapo cam to catch him on camera and use panty bait to catch him the act. I don't particularly want to humiliate him, just let him know I've found him and that he needs to stop. I can sympathize with Luke, I've had feelings sometimes that were taboo (not for Erika, but other things...), however he just can't go around stealing her panties. I know this may seem hypocritical of me with me sniffing Sharon's and all. Also there's a chance he may be reading this very paragraph. So if you are Luke, HAND OVER THE UNDERWEAR AND NOBODY GETS HURT. Needless to say, I haven't requested his babysitting help any more. I should probably give Erika the "naughty places people shouldn't touch inappropriately" speech.
07/13/07(Fri)00:56:54 No.32797157

The problem with not having Luke is I have to rely on my next source: Megan. Megan's infatuation becomes increasingly more creepy every day. Sometimes when I come home to drive her to her place she seems to forget there's a kid in the room. Sharon luckily hasn't seen any of this. I'm trying to avoid her, but it's hard when she's still super hot and provides babysitting service. Will I fuck her in August? Not even I know. She also seems to be having somewhat of an influence of Erika, not a good one either. She seems to think it's "cute" to put Erika in makeup and doll her up, I don't really much like it though. I guess it's relatively harmless though, compared to Luke. I'm pretty sure all he's done is panty thievery, nothing perverted to her actually. I think she would've said something, or have given some indication. Besides, I don't think Luke is that dangerous. I compare him to Mr. Kimura of Azumanga Daioh. He has his faults, his vices, but he's not rotten to the core. Hopefully anyways. In other Megan news, her ex-bf (since she broke it off with him and subsequently got fired) has been e-harassing me. He's never said who he is, but it's pretty obvious. I'm not too worried about it, although it does take me back to being a moody hormonal teen (as opposed to now when I'm a moody hormonal adult, legally anyways).
07/13/07(Fri)00:57:07 No.32797185

Erika's been up to her usual. We've also both been learning braille together, it's not particularly hard (just bumps replacing letters), the issue is remembering which bumps go to which letters. I've still been teaching her typing, and she's improving. Discussing it, Sharon and I thought that maybe we should enroll her in a public school so she can make more friends. It's not like they won't have a person to help her, I'm sure she could manage. I can teach her some things, but she does need a real education. As for Sharon, she's been much busier lately. Mark is back in effect, and Sharon and him are off together a lot. Mark is quickly becoming my enemy though, he seems to be opposed to me staying with Sharon. This is a natural reaction for any boyfriend, but if he's trying separate myself and Erika then he can't be forgiven and must be terminated. I don't really like being the only one without a bf/gf/wife/husband. We've had Jimaroo and his wife over for dinner, with Sharon with Mark, and me with my hand.
07/13/07(Fri)00:57:24 No.32797209

The main candidate for my gf is Megan right now, though I don't see myself bringing her on many adult expiditions. Erika has made friends of Melanie and Amelia though, they're getting along as most kids do. Melanie is sort of a mischevious 12 year old though, taking charge of the trio it would seem being the oldest. She's went over to Jim's to play sometimes, and I haven't gotten any complaints so she must not be tearing his house up. Erika's party is also well under way, I'm making preparations but I'll tell what happens on the day of it. I also was sorta forced into giving Megan an invite (or maybe strongly coerced would be the word), not that I have a problem inviting her. Erika seems to like Megan, looking up to her as the cool older girl who knows more than she does. She probably thinks that same way of Melanie, since she's a bit of a know-it-all. And I guess she gets to assume that position to Amelia, who is younger, so it works out, right? She can still beat them all at checkers though. All is really going good, Erika is socializing and it seems like I may be settled down somewhere for good (unless Mark wants to ruin it, not that I'll let him).
07/13/07(Fri)00:57:39 No.32797232

Goals I have now: 1. Police Luke's pernicious perverted panty plan 2. Enhance Erika's extravaganza 3. Murder malevolent Mark

(lol alliteration). Anyways, this time I definitely won't post a thread until Saturday and tell you how I've been coming on these 3.
Thread 16
07/15/07(Sun)01:41:58 No.33011184

Hello /b/, blindmute loli guy here. As you may or may not know, today was our little Erika's birthday, making her 9. However, before I get into that, I have to cover some events that took place yesterday. In the last entry, Luke was accused of stealing Erika's panties. I was determined to figure out what was up, so I went to Luke's for some undercover action. I claimed it was just a friendly visit, but my real mission was a stealthy invasion of Luke's house, retrieval of underwear, and the assassination of Liquid Snake. I walked into his place, and said I needed to go to the bathroom. That was my cover anyways. Up the stairs I crept, while Luke sat unknowingly. Past the bathroom I went, and down the hall to Luke's room. From being friends with Luke for so long, I know him. He's paranoid, but he's lazy. They would have to be in place people don't usually look, but also in a place he himself could get to easily. Wherever they were, they would have to fulfill those requirements. I checked all of the places I could think of. Under his matress, in his closet, but soon I was exhausted of ideas. Plan A failed. However, I was not without a Plan B, you can be sure. You see, I had a bag of clothes out in the car prepared. Filled with some of my clothes, Erika's, aaaaaand you guessed it: panties. The bait. I brought it in after coming down Luke's stairs. I asked him if I could do some laundry at his place, since Sharon's washer and dryer were broken (which was another lie). Then I said I left something up in the bathroom, and went on the stairs to wait, leaving him alone with the bait. I made a few fake stomping noises on the stairs to make it seem as if I had walked up, and waited.
07/15/07(Sun)01:43:07 No.33011265

From a person who is no stranger to panty stealing and sniffing (though never of an 8 year old), I know how the process works. You spy your target. You begin to get nervous, thinking "should I do it?". "What if somebody walks in..." You get more nervous, but you approach your target more and more. You keep on acting casual, getting closer and closer to the panties. When you're as close as possible, your heart beating, you're still contemplating. You may step back a bit, lose your nerve, but eventually you're just going to grab and sniff. I played this out in my mind, peeking past the corner a bit, but not enough for him to notice me. Before long, he took the bait. I emerged from my hiding position, and I swear he almost had a heart attack. I could sympathize, I was never caught but my heart practically jumped out of my chest when I used to do it anyways (from my sisters, I would loot). Luke looked a bit scared actually, I think he thought I was going to beat the shit out of him. I calmed he down a bit, and we talked about it. I was mad at him, but at the same time I know Luke. I know he's a bit of a lolicon, he has his flaws. "They're not for me, they're for Melinda!" At this point I thought Luke was making up an outrageous excuse about Melinda being some sort of lesbian pedo, but he explained it to me. Melinda has a very small figure, as I've mentioned before. I believe I've used the words "as close as a 25 year old can get to being 8." Luke, to cure his ED, wanted Melinda to dress up like a little girl.
07/15/07(Sun)01:43:27 No.33011291

To complete this, he stole Erika's panties to be worn by Melinda. Do I believe this? Weeeelll, it could be. "Couldn't you just go to the store and buy some?" "That's embarrassing for a dude my age to be buying panties made for young girls!" Well that's true, when I bought the ones for Erika it was a bit awkward at the register. Either way, Luke coughed up the original pair, and it was all okay. Yeah, it was a bad thing for him to do, but we've all made mistakes (like me and Melinda). I did, however, tell him that if he ever does it again or tries anything further I will beat the living shit out of him. "See you at the party tomorrow!" I also went home and gave Erika a little talk about perverts, but she didn't much understand. So I just told her to not let Luke touch her. Goal 1, "Police Luke's pernicious perverted panty plan" - Complete So, getting Friday's events out of the way, Saturday was here. I woke up in the morning, having time before I was planning on taking Erika out so Sharon could set up for the party. We had a special birthday breakfast, which had a pancake with a candle in it. Erika blew out the candle I directed her to, and made a wish. After the eating was finished, it was planning on being a usual morning.
07/15/07(Sun)01:43:38 No.33011303

The party for Erika was a surprise one, and I had made sure it stayed as such. In fact, the birthday breakfast was more of a decoy. Being where she's been, I can imagine she wouldn't expect much more. But more she would get. I used my time productively during this morning, scheduling a doctor's appointment for Erika. She doesn't have any visible problems, but I just thought she should get a general check-up as they say you should get. Of course even though CPS still technically has custody of her (we haven't completed all of the official tedious papers and processes and such) they won't pony up the money for her to go, so it's out of our pocket. I also downloaded a voice cd (as seen on the front page of Wikichan), the one with the little girls saying "oniichan" over and over. Erika didn't get why they kept on saying "big brother" (oniichan being japanese for just that), and I didn't even want to corrupt her innocent mind by explaining why people would pay to hear it. Time passed, and soon it was time for me to take Erika out. Now I lied to her and said that it was for a CPS thing we needed to do. Now I had to rack my brain hard to think of where to take her. The zoo? Well she can't see any of the animals, so no. I thought about maybe Build-a-Bear, but I realized I hate that place with a passion if I have to kiss any plush hearts I might just go crazy and smother everybody in the store with a stuffed bear (except Erika, her and I would escape to Mexico living under false names). Movie? Well she would be able to follow the story by listening, but most movies these days are big old action fests relying on fancy visuals. Then I had a good idea: a museum. Museums have audio tours, so it worked.
07/15/07(Sun)01:43:51 No.33011321

So we were off to the museum, and she was surprised when we got there. I don't know if she was happy about my choice of attraction, but she was certainly happy about not doing anything related to CPS. We had a good time too. History is pretty cool, people getting stabbed and assassinated everywhere. I think I gave Erika a new interest too, she enjoyed the tales of the past, as did I. It was turning out to be a good day, she enjoyed the excursion, and we enjoyed each others company. But I had a sense, something was wrong. She was having fun, but there was something amiss. Hopefully the surprise party would be a hit too. We returned, and the lights were off as it should be. And then, they all jumped out and yelled "BLACK POWER" and stole my wallet. Okay, they all yelled "surprise", but that was expected. Erika was well, surprised, and it seemed that everything was going just as planned. Her friends were there (amelia and melanie), Melinda, Jim and his wife, emo Eric, Megan, everyone who needed to be there. Luke was absent though, for a good reason. Of his own suggestion, he wanted to act at Erika's birthday party as a clown. Erika's probably too old for it, but I didn't want to ruin his good intentions. But Luke's routine was going to come later, right now it was time for the foodz. And on the menu was the perfect kid food, pizza (contrary to popular opinion, loli loev pizza). I asked Sharon where the cake was, and here was when something went wrong. "Well I asked Mark to pick it up but he called me and said he couldn't make it..." GODDAMNIT MARK. I know he doesn't take a personal interest in Erika, I know he's so self-absorbed he doesn't care about anybody but himself, but couldn't he take time out of his oh-so important life to do one thing? Apparently not. So I had to go on a last-minute cake run, but returned home with it soon enough.
07/15/07(Sun)01:44:22 No.33011357

Erika blew out another set of candles and made another wish. "The cake says "happy birthday Erika" on it." She seemed pleased with it, but still something was bothering her. Moving along, Luke the clown apparently became Luke the magician. He did the usual tricks. Erika wasn't able to see some of them to enjoy them, she did like the coin from behind the ear trick though, feeling the coin that Luke had produced. Amelia was probably the one who liked the show the most, and Melanie was a bit too old to enjoy it. And Eric was in the corner with his arms crossed, because he's bad like that. So Luke was a bit of a flop (pun not intended). However, I had more festivities prepared. No party would be complete without a game, no? So I had to think of an appropriate one for Erika. I picked a game I always used to like to play in my youth. We used to call it "killer". The rules of the game are as such. You take a hat or a basket or whatever, and put little pieces of paper in it. Everyone draws one, and if the paper has an "o", you're a victim. If it has an "x", you're the killer. There's only one killer. For our purposes, I changed the paper to dice. Square shaped ones for the victims, and a different shaped one for the killer. If you're the killer, you don't tell anybody.
07/15/07(Sun)01:44:46 No.33011399

During the game, the lights are turned off and everybody finds a good spot to hide. Since the lights are off, visibility isn't really a factor, which is why I picked the game. And Erika knows the layout of the place, so she has an advantage. The killer counts to 20, and then begins stalking the victims (without saying a word to indicate they're coming). The killer tries to find the victims, and when they do taps you to kill you. The object of the victims is to find out who the killer is. If you're killed by the killer, you're out of the game and cannot tell anybody who the killer is. If you're still alive, at any time you can call a meeting to say who you think the killer is. If you're right, you win. If all the victims are killed before anybody catches them, the killer wins. The adults felt a bit silly, and Eric was clearly way too cool to be playing such kid games, but they played anyways. We all picked a dice out, and nobody knew who the killer was. The lights went off, and the game started. I took a hiding spot behind the couch. Suddenly I felt someone grabbing my crotch. Caught already? Nope, it was Megan. Goddamnit Megan. "Quit!" She just giggled and continued following me around. I remembered why I liked this game. The tension, looking at the guy next to you. Are they the killer? Do you trust them? I saw Erika feeling around next to me, was she the killer? Megan, who was still with me, thought she was. She gave me a tickle, which caused me to laugh (I'm pretty ticklish). This alerted Erika to my location, who promptly killed me. Betrayed! Megan then called a meeting, revealing Erika to be the murderer. So we played a few more rounds, and when I was the killer I got my revenge on Megan for her betrayal, and on Erika for killing me. The gifts were exchanged after we played "killer". Well my present... wasn't there. I ordered something, but due to crappy shipping and such it had yet to arrive. I'll tell you what it is when we get it. Megan got Erika some clothes that make me think, "Wow, the kind of clothes they make for 9 year olds these days." Still generous of her. Luke and Melinda's present was a chess set, since I had mentioned possibly teaching Erika (after I learned myself). Sharon got Erika a bracelet. Jimaroo's gift sort of compliments mine (the poor guy didn't have any idea how to shop for Erika), so I won't reveal it yet. Eric also added in some sort of emoish wrist band thingy. O lawd, he's trying to make my kid an emo. In his own emo way though, it's a nice thought.
07/15/07(Sun)01:45:05 No.33011422

Eventually though, it was time for the party to be over. Everybody went home, and Erika was a little bit tired. So she decided to go to bed. Shortly after, we got a knock on the door. Guess who? None other than Lord Mark IV. He asked if the party was over, as if he was shocked it was, and he sounded a little bit drunk. I really wanted to punch him in his douche face, calling me "junior" again. "So Sharon, when ya gonna throw this bum out?" and then he laughed, trying to act like he was joking but I'm sure that's just what he wants. Why does Sharon like this guy? I still don't know. Sharon said she was driving Mark home, so I was left alone. I checked on Erika, to see if Mark had woken her up. She was awake, and crying. I asked her what was wrong, but I already knew. It was bringing her down all day. Her parents, another birthday without them. I talked about it with her, and tried to comfort her. "You know, we all care about you here too. Me, Luke, Sharon, everybody." I held her for a bit, and after she calmed down she seemed ready to go back to sleep. I walked out, but she stopped me. She gestured for her notebook, which I retrieved for her. She wrote down, "I had fun today. I'm glad I'm with you." Oh man my heart melted like chocolate. I gave her a kiss on the forehead, and she fell asleep again. I just stood there looking at her. I'm a pretty lucky guy. Well overall the birthday was a success, and I'm more determined to do everything I can to make Erika happy. She's always seemed like a pretty happy go lucky kid despite her misfortunes, but I was reminded today she still has some emotional wounds. I love that girl though, I'm going to do absolutely everything I can for her.
Thread 17
07/17/07(Tue)01:53:56 No.33202555

Hi ho /b/, it's blindmute loli guy. For tonight, Erika was invited to a sleepover at Jim's place. I wasn't initially thrilled on the idea of her being away, but then again Jim's place is right by (literally) Sharon's. And it would be rude to refuse as they were nice enough to come to Erika's birthday party. So I agreed. Since Erika was going to be gone, I decided I should make some plans for the evening. I had an idea to do a cheaters like sting on Mark, try to catch him being polyamorous. I suggested this to the aim chat, which informed me it was stupid. The more I considered this, the more I agreed. He could see me, and if he does he might be violent and probably drunk. Sharon was going to be late at work, which is why I thought the night would be perfect for catching Mark. I have no solid proof of his wrongdoings, other than a suspicion and his previous history. But I considered perhaps I don't need to get Mark. If Sharon's smart enough she'll dump the asshole on his own, until then I have no reason to interfere. It's not my business, it's not my problem. Sharon's not that weak-willed as to let Mark convince her to kick me out, so he's not a real threat to me. And next time I need something done like a cake for Erika's party, I'll just do it myself and save the extra time it takes to fix his mistakes.
07/17/07(Tue)01:54:11 No.33202568

So it would appear that I have a night of animu, video games, and other general assfuckery for myself, no? No. Well the problem is, I had already asked Megan on a "date" (wanting use of her camera to capture Mark), so that was what I was going to be doing. Megan came over early in the morning to babysit Erika until she went over to Jim's sometime in the afternoon. Megan didn't spare Erika knowledge of our date, which Erika teased me about. "Jake's in love", etc. But hey, I could pick a worse date. A busty 15 year old soon to be 16 isn't that bad. And she does babysit Erika, and she did try to help me out when Luke kicked me out. So maybe I should consider her more as my girlfriend? Eventually if I reject her she'll just get bored and I could possibly lose a good relationship. On the negative side, she's a bit stalkerish. Either way I had a date with her tonight, an obligation which I had to keep.
07/17/07(Tue)01:54:21 No.33202585

So I was off after teasings from Erika and a kiss from Megan (who highly insisted upon it, meaning I wouldn't get out the door unless I kissed her or mauled her down like a football player). Work work work.... and I returned home. Megan was waiting for me in my apt, and I half expected her to be in nothing but her panties with whipped cream all over her nipples or something like that. However, she was just idly watching tv waiting for me to return. Luke was waiting outside (he picked me up from work and was lending me his car for my date), so we hurried out. After dropping Luke back at Melinda's, we were on our way to our destination. We were going to the cinema to see Transformers (which sucked, expectedly). I won't elaborate on the cinematic disaster, but Megan was a bit grabby during the movie. Being sort of a shy person, it was highly embarrassing. Eventually, she grabbed my arm and put it around her (I know I must sound painfully awkward, and I probably am). Truth be told, this particular night was my first date (I was completely unpopular in high school). So yes, laugh if you wish.
07/17/07(Tue)01:54:35 No.33202604

Anyways, after the movie I didn't see anything else to do (well I did, but was committed to not doing that until she's legal, and it's not that long away) so I took her home. When we arrived though, she wanted me to come in to meet her mom. Surprisingly, she was much kinder than expected. I thought she wouldn't like me, but apparently Megan told her everything about me. Me adopting Erika, living in a duplex (which she probably said I owned), while leaving out everything bad about me. Her mother said she'd rather have Megan dating me than some irresponsible kid her own age. I didn't correct her, which Megan noticed. She's not my gf yet though. I'm hoping Erika is okay though, I told her to be good. Jim has had kids longer than me (not blind ones though), so I'm sure he can manage. She'll be growing up before I know it anyways, so I have to get used to her being away from me. Well, I still have a few (like 10 or 11) more years, so it's okay. As long as she doesn't tear down Jim's house...
Thread 18
07/19/07(Thu)21:47:53 No.33476469

Your fortune: Average Luck

Hi /b/, it's blindmute loli guy. As I've been saying in the chat for the last 2 days, Erika's been acting funny. She's been acting funny specifically to me, as if she's mad at me. I had no idea what I might've done to incur this anger (still don't). She's been ignoring me, acting rather coldly to me, so I decided to follow the chat's advice today. Talk to her, don't accept no for an answer, figure out what her problem is. So I got home from work, and found that the gift I had bought for her birthday had finally arrived. It was an iPod. I personally have never owned one, I don't really like the things, but I thought it would be a nice gift for Erika to have music she can take around. So I give it to Erika, who still gives me sort of the cold shoulder. All of you guys in chat said it was supposed to soften her up... Anyways, I sit her down on the couch and say I want to talk to her a bit. She half-listens to me, playing around with the new thing she got (though with not much to do since there's no music on it yet).
07/19/07(Thu)21:48:15 No.33476495

Your fortune: You will meet a dark handsome stranger

I tell her, "Erika, I know there's something wrong. Would you talk to me about it?" She says there's nothing wrong. "Why have you been acting strangely then?" She says he hasn't. We go a bit like this, until she says "stop talking about it". "Erika I just want to know what's wrong, I want to help..." to which she responds "quit annoying me." I'm getting a bit irked, and confused since she's never been bratty with me. "Erika, what is your problem?" I said this in a slightly more forceful voice, and she didn't seem to like it much. She said "leave me alone" in large letters and held it up so I could see it. And then, I don't know if she was aiming to hit where she did (considering she's blind) or to throw as hard as she did, she threw the iPod right at my face. So it hit me right in the face (enough to make a nice bump and hurt like a bitch) and by the time I looked up she had already ran off to her room. This all just happened not too long ago. I'm not really mad so much as hurt. I don't know what's gotten into her, but if she's going to be violent to me what can I do? Maybe it wasn't meant to be. I thought I could be her dad, she'd be my daughter, and everything would work out perfectly. I don't know about it anymore. If I leave, maybe Sharon will take care of her, or maybe she'll get sent back to the home. I don't want to leave her, but maybe I should if she really dislikes me this much. I still don't know what I did.
Thread 19
Anonymous 07/21/07(Sat)00:27:55 No.33593077

Hay /b/, it's blindmute loli guy. When we last parted, Erika had just hit me in the face with a flying iPod. Once I left the chat, I was feeling down. I read over the post I made though, and said "I'm not letting this happen." So I went into Erika's room, determined to do my best. Erika was crying on her bed. I went over to her and put my arm around her, and she didn't push me away. She just cried on me a bit before I asked her what was wrong. She didn't answer me at first. She ignored my question. I asked again, still nothing. I asked one more time, and she seemed to get a bit fussy so I thought there was going to be more trouble. But then... "I don't want you to die." "Erika, I'm not going to die." She then told me that I AM going to die if I stay around her. She told me that she's cursed to kill everyone she loves. Yeah, she actually believed this. What I learned is that her dad, sister, and mother all died at 3 separate times, her mother being the most recent. Bad luck, but certainly not a curse. She was trying to get me to take her back to the childrens' home so I could be "saved".
Anonymous 07/21/07(Sat)00:28:13 No.33593101

I told her that nobody's cursed and that if I did die, it wouldn't be because of any curse against her. She didn't believe me at first, but I convinced her. She apologized for acting like she did, and I accepted. She dried her tears on my shirt, and we just lied there together for a bit. Before I finally broke the silence. "You know Erika, I love you too." She looked up at me and gave me a big smile, then a kiss (a father-daughter sort of kiss). I gave a sigh of relief, since the problem seemed to be solved. So we fell asleep there together. Today, she's back to her usual chipper self times 4 (apparently making up for lost time). She's been hyper the whole day, but is sleeping fine now. Another crisis avoided it would seem. For now... bum bum buuuuuuuuuuum.
Thread 20
Anonymous 07/21/07(Sat)23:23:40 No.33681669

It's blindmute loli guy, now with three lolis. I believe I mentioned this in chat before, but I'll mention it again. Since Jim invited Erika to sleep over at his house, I invited his kids (minus emo eric) to stay at Sharon's, and that very night is tonight. I now have three lolis in my living room, Amelia, Erika, and Melanie, and no pooper sticking is going on. Does this make me a terrible /b/tard? Probably. The day started as usual. I wanted to sleep in since I stayed up late and it was the weekend, but always bouncy Erika made sure I was awake. So the morning proceeded as usual, and the afternoon came before I knew it. I was already stocked up on supplies though. Plenty of sweet food, junk food, pizza (contrary to popular opinion, loli do leik pizza), and other stuff.
Anonymous 07/21/07(Sat)23:24:15 No.33681711

Soon they arrived, with backpacks and sleeping bags. I would imagine that if I was Konata's dad from Lucky Star I would be saying right about now, "I win at life." They devoured the pizza (I personally haven't ever much cared for it) and the festivities were set to begin. I had recently rented Big Brain Academy for the Wii, so they decided they wanted to play. Erika couldn't, be she gladly cheered me on. My two opponents were Amelia and Melanie. Time to kick some butt right? 19 year old versus a 6 year old and a 12 year old. We started up a "brain quiz". We had to pick events, and my turn was first. I picked the balloon popping game. It's simple, balloons are one the screen, each one with a number, and you pop them from lowest to highest. The difficulty was hard though, never ran into that before. How hard could it be though? Suddenly the screen was filled with like 15 balloons. I looked around for the lowest one, popped -4. And I missed negative 5. Well oh shit. 0 points for me. Okay okay, it's all cool, I can come back. And look at that, I get a second chance. This one should be easy, all I have to do is guess the animal as they slowly reveal it. I failed that one too, and learned the hardest rule of Big Brain Academy: there are no third chances. I came in second place, sandwiched between the two girls (oh man I just realized how perverted that sounds). For the second game, Amelia pulled out something she brought. A board game, called "pretty pretty princess". O lawd. It's basically a game of chance, you go around the spaces by using a spinner, if you land on certain spaces you get to pick out "jewelry" (more like jewry) to put on. Those fake earrings really hurt your ears. In the end, Erika was able to come out on top as the prettiest princess of them all, wearing the crown (I for one think I would've looked the best in it). Everyone except Amelia was sort of bored with the game, playing it non-seriously.
Anonymous 07/21/07(Sat)23:24:36 No.33681732

The next game they wanted to play was truth or dare. Melanie wanted to go first, and asked me truth or dare. Not being very daring, I picked truth. "Have you ever did "it" with a girl?" Ooooooooooooooooooooooooooooh lawd, damn 12 year olds. "Uuuuuh ask me another question..." Erika and Amelia where (at least I hope) confused by the question. "No you picked truth, answer it!" (and the answer is no). "Fine, I pick dare." She dared me to rip one of my hairs out and eat it. Instead of doing this, I choose to be exiled from their reindeer games. I don't know what they're doing out there now, but as long as nobody needs to go the emergency room I guess it's a job well done on my part.
Thread 21

Timestamps unavailable
Thread Text

Salutations /b/, good evening and hello

This is a post of the blindmute loli fellow

Take Erika to the doctor did he today

Leaving work early, he was gay

Arriving at the office just in time

Looking so good it must be a crime

Called to the doctor were the two

Whose name cast him as a jew

Provide CPS records did he

Which to proved to be no help to me

The doctor said she was in good health

And despite having little wealth

I scheduled a scan of the brain

To find the cause of the titular pain

Answers will come, but not now

But don't go and have a cow

For I will keep you all au fait

And don't you think to be irate

If Nurse-kun can speak haiku

Can't I be a poet too?
Thread 22
Anonymous 07/26/07(Thu)01:22:37 No.34124045

Hay /b/, it's blindmute loli guy, with no more rhyming. I guess I'm not the next Homer. In the morning, I went into Erika's room to check on her and noticed an odd stain on her pajamas. It seems she wet the bed. Speaking of which, I used to wet the bed until I was 9 or so, had to wear pull-ups to bed. One time my older sister told all of my friends who told the whole school and everybody started calling me "piss stain" (by her suggestion). :( I changed her into clean pants without trying to wake her up, and I was off to get ready for work. The workday came and went, however I had something to do before I went home. You see, they often say anime isn't a productive activity. However, watching the anime "Midori No Hibi" I had a revelation about my own life. In the anime, a guy named Seiji wakes up and has a girl on his right hand in place of his actual hand. This girl is madly in love with him, but he constantly shoots her down. And I begin thinking "Damn that bastard Seiji!" But then it hit me, it sort of resembles the situation between me and Megan. She tries her hardest to win my affections, helps me out when I need it, and I shoot her down. In the end of the anime, Seiji and Midori (the chick on his hand) eventually become happy lovers. I decided that today I would ask Megan to officially be my gf. To seal the deal, I thought I should buy her some sort of gift right? Last night in the chat, one of the chat's girls (windmill) messaged me, offering a girl's opinion. We discussed for a bit. Eventually she brought up that maybe a dildo would be a good idea. Odd, yes, but it did actually seem like an okay choice. The best I could think of was a run-of-the-mill idea of "buy her some shiny jewelry". And I think Megan's a bit kinkier than that. Examples: One time she said that maybe she could win me over with something kinky, and then kicked me in my fleshspheres. During a random conversation between us, she yes to me asking "Would you ever pee on a guy?"
Anonymous 07/26/07(Thu)01:23:35 No.34124110

As the night went on, I decided upon it. Tomorrow, dildo it is. So where one buys dildos would be an "adult" shop, and that's where I went. As I arrived, I immediately began to become increasingly uncomfortable. As I walked in, all sorts of thoughts raced through my head. "What if CPS has spies set up to watch me!?" "Ah wtf I have a 9 year old daughter I shouldn't be in a sex toy shop!" "I'm buying a 15 year old a dildo, what the fuck kind of crazy ass pervert am I?" Heart pounding, sweating, arms stiff as a board to my sides I realized I need to get the fuck out of this place. As I'm leaving, something crosses my eyes: Fleshlight. I've heard of them before, seen pics, but never used one. I looked at it for a bit, as if in a trance thinking "Buy it, no don't buy it, no buy it, no fuck you don't buy it". But I bought it. I grabbed it, brought it up to the register and felt like I was going to faint on the counter because of how anxious I am. The lady there even asked me if I was okay. But the purchase was complete. I got into my car, and drove straight home, not even caring that I didn't get Megan anything. A mix of arousal and disgust. "If I can't get real vag maybe this will feel great..." "Oh god why did I buy this?" "I could've spent the money I spent on this buying Erika socks I'm a terrible person..." "Probably overrated..." "But maybe it'll be an awesome masturbatory tool..." "What if Sharon or Erika discovers it?"
Anonymous 07/26/07(Thu)01:24:07 No.34124141

Going home with the bag felt like smuggling some illegal immigrant. Damn you Senor Fleshlight! Pero mi pene necesita violarte! When I got home, as expected Megan asked what was in the bag. This got Erika interested, which was bad. She tried to peek inside, so I grabbed her hand and ran to my room. I stashed the Senor where nobody would find him (or her). Appearing back out, I drifted the conversation away from my bag by asking Megan the fo dolla question: Would you like to be my official gf? She said yes, mission complete. Accuracy: 100% Erika was snickering, making kissy faces and such. Then she asked if this would make Megan her mom. We both laughed, but to point out something here, if Megan dating me would make Erika think she would possibly end up her mom, what does that make me? Hell yeah, motherfucker. I drove Megan home, and in the car she was being particularly grabbing, trying to give me a handjob while I'm driving. "Do you want us to crash?" She just giggled and said, "You wonder why you're still a virgin..." "And you aren't?" This of course would contradict what she previously told me, catching her in a lie. She stopped giggling and responded, "Well no but I'm not as uptight as you are."
Anonymous 07/26/07(Thu)01:24:17 No.34124152

Upon coming home, I had a little talk with Erika about her wetting the bed. She was embarrassed about the subject, not knowing herself that she did since I changed her wet clothes. She told me she's had a problem with it for a while, but she thought she got over it. To make her feel better, I told her about my own nocturnal urine emissions, and she laughed at my former nickname. "You know though, it's nothing to be ashamed of, if you need something to help you with it it's not a big deal.." but she seemed vehemently opposed to the idea of anything like that. Well, I suppose it's fine for now. I also told her about a recurring nightmare I had. I would just be walking along in a seemingly normal situation, and then suddenly a trap door would open below me and I would fall in it. It's like that game show Russian Roulette. Not terribly frightening I suppose, but still scared me as a kid. Erika said she doesn't remember many of her dreams, a shame since kids are supposed to have better dream retention than us. As for the Senor, he's still in his hiding place. I'm sort of scared to take him out, to use him. Eventually I'll have to face him head on, and drop a load of zygote ingredient into his sweet hole. Maybe not tonight though.
Thread 23
07/31/07(Tue)01:56:21 No.34522699

Hello /b/, it's blindmute loli guy. Incase you didn't know, I went to my parents' house for the weekend and took Erika and Megan along to meet my parents. Before I get to that though, I'll mention a little talk I had with Megan. The night before I left, the chat was harassing me with questions and such. "What would you do if Erika wanted to buy a thong?" "What would you do if Erika got pregnant at 14?" and all sorts of their pedophile fantasies. Anyways, I said to the thong thing "She wouldn't." "How do you know?" asked the chatters. "Well I'm the primary influence on her and I buy her clothes so she'd have no reason to want one and she can't even see it." Then the chat told me there was in fact another influence on Erika: Megan. They asked me what would happen if one day Erika went to Megan and asked for advice on how to be "sexy" or appeal to men or whatnot. So I have to say, it bothered me. I talked to Megan about it the next day before we left. "So Megan let's say that one day Erika came up to you asking on advice on how to be sexy, what would you say?" Megan looked at me like I was a pedo. "I mean, uh... how do I put it..." I had to express what I wanted to express without offending Megan... "Would you ever recommend Erika wear a thong?" "She's only 9 Jake!" "No I mean like if she's around your age would you?" "Well every girl wears them, don't tell me you have a problem with thongs?" "Well kinda I'd prefer she never wore them..." "Do you not want me to wear one?" Oh curse her, appealing to my dick. "Well I think they're appropriate in a private bedroom atmosphere they're okay but in public..." "Okay, I won't wear them." Hmmm, that was oddly easy. Getting off of that subject, "So Megan, when did your parents give you 'the talk'?" "They didn't actually, I learned stuff from my friends and school." "When should I give Erika the talk then?" "Maybe 10 years old" suggested Megan. Oh lawd! She agreed with the chat. I thought I didn't have to worry about this stuff until she was like 13. "You've never talked to her about any of that stuff right Megan?" "I just taught her how to masturbate..." "WHAT!?" "I was kidding." So that's basically how the conversation went, I guess it didn't really help much. But hey I suppose I have to accept it, she won't be totally innocent forever. At least I've still got time. So we were packed and ready to go. Sharon wasn't there to say goodbye, I figured I'd call her when we got there so she knows we aren't dead (if she even cares as long as her Mark is alright). We got in the car, and we were off. Megan sat by me in the front seat, and Erika had the back all to herself. It was a pleasant trip, Erika had some music on the iPod that she got now so she listened to that. For a bit we played a guessing game of describing something and having other people guess what it is, and then she fell asleep. She woke up and we stopped at a gas station for a bathroom break, and she fell asleep and stayed asleep for the rest of the trip. Megan played my DS, she liked the "pink marshmallow" (Kirby).
07/31/07(Tue)01:56:35 No.34522723

It wasn't long before we arrived. "Erika, wake up, we're here." She woke up, and we walked into my parents' house. My mother, father, and a sister were waiting for us in the living room. Erika and I walked in, and once my mom saw her she melted into an entirely new form. She went into ultra grandmother mode. My mom and dad both went up to Erika and were enthralled by her cuteness. My mother said, "She is just too adorable!" and my dad even went "She's the cutest damn thing I've ever seen." Erika was enjoying the attention. "Yup your only son here..." "Oh please if you were as cute as her you would've had a girlfriend in high school" said my mother. Haha, well she was about to get hers. "Actually mom, I brought my girlfriend to see you both too." Megan was in the bathroom, and when she came in my parents had a different reaction. A look of "isn't she a bit young...?" They didn't say it of course though, and they were nice. My sister loved Erika too, she agreed equally that Erika was the cutest thing ever. She reacted a bit less nicely to Megan though. At least she gave me a hug though. So we all went out to dinner. We all had a nice time, and after we went home. My parents went to bed, so it was just us kids up. Erika, Emily, and Megan went to a room leaving me alone. So I watched a bit of tv, and decided to go in to see what they're doing. When I looked, they all had underwear on their head. Girls sure are strange. Eventually everbody went to bed. We woke up the next morning, and my parents wanted to do something all together. So we decided on going bowling. Erika said she's done it before, so I believe her.
07/31/07(Tue)01:57:03 No.34522770

We all arrived at the bowling alley and got our shoes. Now I know what you're thinking, "Erika can't bowl." Well that's partially true. We had to get a lane with bumpers because if we didn't I would imagine she wouldn't be able to bowl very well. However, if we showed her where the edges of our lane were she was able to bowl fine (or at least keep the ball in our lane). Of course it might've been more luck than skill, but she didn't do terrible. She even got a strike once. So we played and played, everyone enjoyed themselves and such. My parent's payed for it all (in fact since my parents were in giving grandparent mode Erika made off with a lot of loot before the weekend was over). After bowling, Megan, my mom, my sister, and Erika went shopping so my dad and I were left alone. We went home and hung out for a bit. "Want a beer jake?" "I don't really drink..." "What kind of 19 year old are you?" So I had one (yes I know I sound like some huge loser, I'm not straight egde or any shit like that I just don't get out much). We just watched tv and stuff. Eventually they returned, and Erika showed us all the new outfits she bought that my mother thought were just adorable. Well, she did look cute.
07/31/07(Tue)01:58:52 No.34522915

Anyways, after people had retired to bed Megan decided to come into my room. Erika was already asleep, but I had already an idea of what Megan wanted. So before I knew it, Megan was humping my crotch on my bed. My old bed, the same bed I had for 4 years of highschool without getting any action. My mind did a sort of "Maybe you shouldn't..." but my penis has always been a fast and smooth talker, he can convince me to do most anything. My sister was still up though, and she walked in. She gave me a real nasty look, but just closed the door and walked away. Megan didn't seemingly care, and began humping away again but I pushed her off (and precum was dripping from my dick). I went into my sister's room. "I'm sorry about what you saw there, I shouldn't have been doing that..." "I knew exactly what you were going to do, that's why I came in your room." "What?" She told me she doesn't like Megan. "You've just always been a nice guy Jake, I don't want to see you get hurt." Aaaaaww. So she is worried about me! I sat down on the bed next to her and put my arm around her (and don't get any ideas). "Megan isn't a bad chick, don't worry." So after a bit she said okay, I gave her a hug and left the room. When I got back, Megan was pissed that I had chosen to go comfort my sister rather than stay with her, so looks like the virginity fairy had yet evaded me again. I just put my head down and whimpered like a dog, and fapped away.
07/31/07(Tue)01:59:32 No.34522968

When we woke up on Sunday, we only had a bit before we had to go. My sister was visibly nicer to Megan though, who was back to her usual flirtacious self and not being mad at me (this flirtaciousness being when nobody is around). We ate breakfast and hung out a bit before we went. My mother and father once again gave Erika a big hug, happy about their new granddaughter. They even gave Megan a hug, being hug happy. So, I'd say things worked out. In the end, both Erika and Megan ended up getting the seal of approval from my family. Didn't get laid, but I had a good time and Erika did too. Became closer to my sister, who is worried about her loserish yet sweet oniichan (okay she never called me oniichan but wouldn't it be great if she did?). Megan's birthday (August 1st) is tomorrow too. I'm going to take her out for her birthday, but I still don't have a gift... So yeah, I'm going need to do some shopping quick tomorrow. Any ideas? I was also thinking of giving her a birthday party during the weekend at Sharon's place. And about the Senor (the fleshlight), nope, haven't used it yet. I've been away from it the whole weekend and I just forgot about it until somebody in chat mentioned it just now. Maybe I'll use it tonight.

Thread 24

Note: Due to Wikichan downtime, timestamps unavailable
Post 1

Ello /b/, it's blindmute loli guy here again. Now as you may or not know, tonight was Megan's birthday. Meaning that she turned 16. Legal, perfectly acceptable to fuck without the party van trying to get me. So tonight was the night I was going to have sex with her and lose my virginity after 19 long years. The operation was a three pronged effort. The first offensive front would be taking her out to dinner. Then I would present the gift I bought her, then fuck her. Erika was going to stay at Jim's until Sharon got home, and then I would go pick Megan up. Getting ready, I tried to make myself look and smell as good as possible. Hopefully good smelling cologne, hair not all messy, decent clothes. "Well I think you look about as good as is possible for you," I said to myself in the mirror. I told Erika to wish me luck, and she got a mischevious look on her face. "Are you getting lucky tonight?" WHAT!? "What has Melanie been telling you Erika?" Damn 12 year olds. "Don't listen to her." I dropped Erika off at Jim's, gave her a kiss for luck, and I was off.
Post 2

I arrived at Megan's house, who was looking beautiful. But uh oh, the enemy deployed a weapon I hadn't accounted for. Megan wanted me to officially meet her dad. Keep in mind I had met him before, when I was homeless for a day. By the look on his face, I could tell he wasn't happy that I was taking out his daughter, or that she was now officially legal. "So you got a home now or are you living in a box?" Yep, he definitely wasn't happy to see me. "I live in a duplex sir." Oh how I wanted to smack the glare off of his face... "Where do you work?" I told him the restuarant, to which he gave an assholish "hmmm...". "Where do you go to college?" Agh fuck him. "Nowhere currently..." He had run out of questions after that, meaning we could finally leave. Dinner went by without anything of note happening, she was having a good time which meant I was doing well. Then it was time to present my gift. I'm a pretty unoriginal fuck, so I went with something windmill from the chat told me (contrary to a previous claim I made, she actually wanted me to put a ring around my penis, not a dildo, more from Fox at 11). So I got a claddagh ring if that's spelled right, what she told me. And it means different things if you put it on different fingers or in different ways, usual stuff girls eat up. Of course I was going to try and be less boring. So I had two small ring boxes, except they both had condoms in them. I told her that if she picked the one with the ring in it (which there wasn't) she gets the ring, and if she picks the condom one she has sex with me. She picks one, and it has a condom in it, and I show her the other one has the same, and then I produce the ring from my pocket (aren't I such a smooth operator?). I explain to her the ring, and she says she likes it. Unspoken between us though, we both wanted to get to what's really been on our minds the whole night.
Post 3

So we were going to a motel to do our business. Arriving in the room, Megan wastes no time in getting down to business. She strips to her underwear, and begins humping my crotch. Suddenly I begin getting a bit anxious... waiting for this day forever... yet I can't do it... shit... it's not going up... I started slipping into a negative thought pattern. "You're going to fail so hard at this." Now, let me take you back. 1996. Being 19 now in 2007, 2007 minus 1996 would make me around 8. I'm sure many /b/tards were also little skippers around that time (and some probably much younger). Back in 1996, a show called "Hey Arnold" came on the air. About a good hearted kid with a weird shaped head, it was. Arnold made an effort to help many of the neighborhood denizens, but one of the most memorable would have to be Stoop Kid. Stoop kid was afraid to leave his stoop. He was tauned by everybody. But Stoop Kid eventually took that fateful step off of his stoop. And you know what he chanted? "I think I can." And there it was.
Post 4

"I think I can, I think I can, I think I can..." And then I was reminded of a little song from FLCL by The Pillows, by that same name. The opening guitar sequence of the song played in my head as I was now prepared to fuck this woman. Boner rising, t-link established, it was time. Megan continued, and my boner steadily rose. ?Nitemo nitsukanai hutago no kimi shitandai kutsuhimo sae...? I layed down on the bed, and she took my dick out and began sucking on it. Amazing it was, extremely amazing. As a sidenote, last night I did use the fleshlight. It was okay, but nothing compared to Megan on my cock. It did make me wonder if she hadn't done it before though... ?kutsuhimo sae modokeppa nashi no mama uwa no sora...? Before long, she flips around, putting her vag in my face. Alright, this is it. Giving oral, I can do this. I've read up on it plenty, no problem. ?Machi kamaeteru HYENA no KISS kanippatsu...? Wait, what the fuck is this!? This wasn't in the wikipedia article! ?dare no me ni mo oyoso hukan na BET tanoshi mitai na? It was piss. Megan had pissed on my face. "Megan, why the fuck did you do that!?" "I thought you liked that weird stuff." "Not by surprise, you got it in my eye!" "Well I'm sorry kinky" "Megan, do you have to make jokes? I'm trying to do this and you're not making it easy." "You could always do it by yourself." Well, can't argue with that. So yes, she really did piss on my face, and I wouldn't have minded if she would've told me. I would've found it erotic except that her piss burned my eye. So I went to the bathroom to wash it out, and then came back. It was time to skip the other shit, and just fuck her already. So I stripped fully naked, as did she, it was go time. I got on top of her about to stick my dick in, and she has to yet argue with me. "Missionary?" "Uuuh yeah what's the problem?" "Well it's sort of plain, isn't it?" AH WHAT IS HER PROBLEM. "What position does her highness want to do?" "Doggy style maybe?" Oh fuck this, I wasn't going to debate with her while my dick gets softer and softer. She should go fuck air bud if she likes dogs. So I stuck my dick in, AND SHE SIGHED AT ME. I meant it may have just been some other sigh-like noise, but still. Never have I felt like a lesser man. Oh wait, stay tuned. So I begin thrusting. ?I think I can, I think I can, I think I c--Wait... wait a second, IT'S OVER? NO IT CAN'T BE OVER, WE HAVE LIKE 5 MORE VERSES! Looking at the unsatisfied expression on Megan's face, I could tell it was definitely over. So I orgasmed, great and all, but once I came back seeing that face... that expression... it will give me nightmares. Her eyes saying "That was it?" I mean I didn't expect to last long my first time, but this was unexpected. I probably lasted no longer than it would take you to read any sentence in this paragraph. As I threw the condom away, the closing guitar sequence of the song played. I mean it's possible I didn't do that bad and we both had unreal expectations,but it felt like an extremely short time....
Post 5

We got cleaned up, and I drove her home. We didn't say much too each other on the way, my performance being more than underwhelming. So yeah, I'm sort of embarrassed. Actually, I'm more than "sort of" embarrassed. Immasculated. It's at these times I appreciate the senor, who may be my only sex partner if I keep this up. That's how it happened, hopefully the j-rock and hey arnold distracted you from my massive winure. On a side note, I got an IM from my sister. She enjoyed my visit and seeing Erika, so she wanted to come up to stay at Sharon's for a bit. Mom and dad agreed, so they're going to drive her up on Saturday. At least something good happened, Erika was excited at the idea.
Thread 25
08/06/07(Mon)06:18:40 No.35252533

Hello slashbee, blindmute loli guy here. Over the weekend, my sister came to visit (and she's still here to stay a week). She arrived on Saturday, but something happened before that on Friday. Megan was babysitting as usual, and when I come home she pulls me into the other room to talk privately. "Jake, I have something to tell you, and you may not like it..." Yadda yadda she's building tension to tell me some lame joke or something. "I used an EPT today..." EPT? Electric pet lizard? Oh shit, early pregnancy test. Okay so now I'm starting to shit bricklets. "Anyways it came up..." Shitting full bricks now. "Positive." Shitting a brick house. So thoughts run through my head of the pitter patter of a little baby, in addtion to Erika that I have to take care of. And then of course there's the cost that goes along with it. Megan could tell I was minorly freaking out so she says "Just kidding." Goddamn her. "Jake, you're so gullible, it's too early for an EPT anyways." So yeah, it was a joke. "But Jake, I think I should break up with you." Haha, another joke. Hahahahahaha... she's not laughing. Nope, the first joke was to soften me up for that. Megan broke up with me. I wasn't really that upset, just a bit disappointed. Did lose my virginity to the girl, and I was sort of convinced she wasn't a shallow bitch. I don't know why she would expect me to be good in the bed though, but whatever. I drove her home in silence with a Mr. Grumpy look on my face.
08/06/07(Mon)06:23:47 No.352529300

I went home and told Erika the news, and she said she could be my girlfriend if I needed one. Of course, I had to smile at that. So I gave Erika the ring that I just got back. And her and I sat home the whole evening together, and it was a lot better than having sex with Megan. On Saturday, about noon, my sister arrived. My parents couldn't resist coming up to my place though to see Erika and of course snoop around. My dad looked around at Sharon's clothes strung all over the place and said "Hasn't this lady ever heard of a hamper?". "Guess not," as my nose recalled that panty scent wafting on my nostrils. My dad gave Erika some money, so she was happy as a clam which made him give her even more (thanks for that college savings account dad). After they left, we all went out for some ice cream (well I didn't have any, I don't like it that much). I told Erika she could pay for it with her newfound wealth, and she gave me her sad puppy expression, which is too cute to argue with. Luke came too, since I had called him over today. I was missing the 360 (which was fixed now), so I wanted to trade him for the Wii (which he admitted he was missing). Technically both systems are more his than mine, since he payed the most money for both, but he does have 11 other systems at his place which belong to me (I never throw them away). Apparently my sister likes FF, and so does Luke (which sometimes annoys the shit out of me), so they both had Sephirothgasms all over each other. I didn't even know my sister had a PS2, there certainly wasn't one in her room. I never had one either, so she couldn't have played it with me. Maybe at a friend's house. Erika certainly made a mess of her ice cream, but most kids do.
08/06/07(Mon)06:32:48 No.35253600

We returned home, and hung out a bit for the rest of the evening. Sharon called and said she was sleeping over at Mark's (every day we see less and less of her). So my sister took Sharon's bed. When everybody was asleep, I pulled out the fleshlight. I began using it, but of course it had to be interrupted. Erika walked in to my room while I was fucking away at it. She couldn't see me obviously, so she didn't know what I was doing. I don't know if it made a loud noise, but I stopped when she came in and quickly pulled my pants up and threw the fleshlight on the floor. What she wanted to talk to me about was what she had in her pants. Urine, that is. She woke up and found she wet herself again. So I was playing dad while my throbbing dick was like "lol wut where da fleshlight at". "Do you have any nightmares that go along with you wetting yourself?" She said no, and that she dreams about dogs peeing on fire hydrants when she wets herself usually. "Well... bed-wetting is completely normal and some people just do it for longer than others. It will go away on its own though." I cleaned her up and sent her back to bed, and my sister was up, probably because I stumbled around in the dark and crashed into stuff (don't know how Erika does it). "What's wrong Jake?" "Nothing, Erika wet herself a bit." "Oh okay." She yawned and went back to bed. Then my penis dragged me back into my sleeping quarters, shot me in the face, and dumped my body in the river. Not really, but I did finish up with the fleshlight.

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Post Re: BlindMute Loli (B)
08/06/07(Mon)06:33:36 No.35253664

On Sunday, Luke made a little surprise visit. Him, my sister, and I played Gears of War a bit. My sister was a bit clueless, apparently real time is a bit of trouble for her. Erika sat on my lap and I had her man the button to activate the lancer's chainsaw, so I had her chainsawing aliens. And now, thanks to Luke, my sister wants to dress up as Yuna and go to an anime convention (Luke told her she'd made a good Yuna). I need to save my sister from weeabooism. Luke even tried to steal Erika for the FFanboys, saying she could be Rikku. Other than that, a pretty average day. I asked my sister to babysit tomorrow since I don't think I want to hire Megan again.
Thread 26
08/09/07(Thu)06:16:40 No.35592330

Sup /b/, blindmute loli guy here. As stated in a previous post, my sister is visiting me this week. I haven't actually seen much of her though, it seems that every time I get home from work she's going to the mall or something. I did just have an odd conversation with her though. She asked me how I felt about older guys dating younger women. I said that they should date guys more suited to their own age. And that's all she cared to hear on the matter. I know what you're thinking, sounds like some cliched incest setup, but there has been none of that. In other news, I've found a game that Erika can play. Typing of the Dead. She can't see the words needing to be typed so I have to tell her what needs to be typed (which can sometimes be a hazard in tense zombie situations) but she's actually become pretty good at using a keyboard. I just randomly found it on my computer. It's nice that she can enjoy two of my great loves though, typing and the slaying of the undead. Now if only they included an option to have a little zombie rape. Megan has been unsuccessfully trying to get me back (I think). Not for my amazing charms I would imagine, but some crazy other motive. She's being pretty outrageous about it too. She's complimented my dick size, then called me a pedophile, talked about herself sticking shampoo bottles up her ass, and all sorts of stupid things. I could get rid of her, but it's pretty funny. And as an added revenge, I told her old boyfriend she was single again so I imagine he's stalking her now.
08/09/07(Thu)06:17:17 No.35592377

For the most important thing today though, Erika told me something that I didn't exactly like. Erika said randomly today, "I almost got kissed today." LOL WUT. It seems Emo Eric, Jim's son, has a bit of anonymous in him. He was playing truth or dare with Erika, Melanie, and Amelia and dared Erika to kiss him. She refused, and luckily she had the good sense to tell me. I told her not to play those kinds of games with Eric, but there's still the matter of what to do with him. Unlike Luke, he's not my friend, and he went for the Erika directly so he's in a shitload trouble with me. By the time she had said this, it was too late to go over to Jim's so I had to let my anger simmer. There's two ways I could go with this. The first would be telling Jim, and let him dispense whatever forms of parental such-and-such he deems fit. The second would be to go over and rough Eric up a bit. I am liking the second one. Either way tomorrow I'm going to make sure Eric gets his horny little teenage mind put back into reality. There's a small chance he didn't mean anything by it, but an even bigger chance he's trying something that I definitely don't like. And if he ever tried anything further, he'd have a real problem. It's not like I can really stop her from going to Jim's (well I could), but she likes Melanie and Amelia so it's not a good idea. I'm wondering if Eric's ever tried something on his sisters. Darn, I really want to punch the shit out him (I'm no bodybuilder but he's pretty scrawny) but he's younger than me so I guess I can't without getting in trouble. Now I'm ranting about it but I'm actually pretty fucking pissed he would dare try something. Have to stay cool though. Erika said kissing boys is gross anyways, thank the lawd for her childhood innocence.
Thread 27
08/10/07(Fri)00:50:17 No.35675480

Hello /b/, blindmute loli guy here. So getting right to business, emo eric had a little rage from me coming today, being that he tried to violate the innocence of my Erika. How to get to him though? I decided on scaring him a bit. Just to make sure he would never even think of doing anything again. After work, I called Jim and asked if it would be okay if Erika could play with Amelia and Melanie there a bit. Jim said yes, as he always does since he's such a nice guy, and Erika and I were off. When we arrived, it seems emo Eric already had his game face on. He was downstairs and gave an enthusiastic hello to Erika. Bastard. I sat down to converse with Jim for a bit, but my real target was Eric. Eventually Erika became tired of our adult chit chat (as did I, Jim's a nice guy but he goes on and on) so she ran upstairs to play with Melanie and Amelia. And with that, Eric went to go upstairs too. Fuck, he's going to escape my clutches. So I needed some excuse real fast to follow Eric upstairs. Eureka! "Hey Jim can I use your bathroom?" Now in actuality this isn't much of a good excuse. Sharon's place, and Sharon's bathroom was extremely close, being that it is a duplex (but we don't share any actual rooms). Jim said "sure" though, so I ran upstairs behind Eric.
08/10/07(Fri)00:50:54 No.35675532

In the hallway, right behind my prey. I started slowly, acting like I was just walking to the bathroom innocently. But I had my predator eyes upon him. They lusted for his blood. Or at least his fear. Then he came to the opening of his room, which I entered and before he realized I had came in behind him I was holding him by his shirt against the wall. I put on my best slightly-crazy looking face, one that says "I just jerked off in the pancake batter." He didn't scream or struggle, he just gave me the deer in the headlights look. I'm pretty sure he knew what it was about, and I'm pretty sure he expected me to throw him out the window. Of course even though he knew exactly what it was all about, I couldn't let him off that easy. "Ever played truth or dare?" He didn't answer me, just gave me that frightened expression again. That alone was extremely satisfying. I sure wiped his "I'm so apathetic I don't care about anything I'M EMO" expression off of his face pretty damn fast. "Okay Eric I'm not going to kill you, because I'm older than you and I'd get in a lot of trouble. However, I will tell you this. If I find out, and I will find out, that you've been trying anymore of the shit you tried yesterday I will cut your dick off. Do you understand?" At this point I half let him go half pushed him into the wall and he fell down. At that point he actually groveled at my feet and thanked me, then apologized and said he'd never do anything again. Lulzworthy, since he didn't actually do anything he could really get in trouble (at least legally) for but he was treating it as a life or death situation which I just spared him from. Either way, it works for me. Upon leaving, I did have one last nugget of advice for him. "Try going after chicks your own age." And with that, I wrote down a phone number: Megan's.
08/10/07(Fri)00:51:29 No.35675596

So that was another problem solved. When Erika got home I asked her if she had seen Eric at all and she said he didn't come out of his room the entire time she was there. In other news, Mark has become an even bigger douchebag. He bought a motorcycle, and drives it in our driveway late at night to show Sharon. Erika was already asleep, and I'm sure Jim's family was too but no he had to come to see his wimman. And he couldn't just show her it, he had to rev it up really loud for 5-10 minutes it must have been because he's such a badass on it. He woke Erika up, who had this to write about it: "He's an asshole." I know I shouldn't be encouraging profanity (not like she already doesn't know tons of it), but I had to agree with her on that. I have a feeling tonight won't be the last time I hear that annoying "vroom, vroom". Megan's still trying to talk to me (as I'm writing this post, which is annoying) and she hasn't mentioned anybody calling her yet, so I guess Eric wimped out. In other news, my birthday is Sunday which is also the same day my sister is going home. I've began to form a little theory. I haven't seen much of her, she seems to be always going to the mall every day when I come home. That convo we had last night was the longest in a while. So I'm thinking, maybe she's planning a little surprise birthday party. It all fits in perfectly. My parents happen to be coming up the same day to pick her up, and she's been out possibly making preparations. Wishful thinking maybe, but it'd be nice. Thinking about it, I tried to interrogate Erika a bit to see if she knows anything. She told me nothing, but I'm not entirely sure she doesn't know anything.
Thread 28
08/13/07(Mon)01:12:48 No.36031288

Hey /b/, blindmute loli guy here. Saturday, started out as a normal day. All was peaceful and serene. A little too peaceful perhaps. Luke calls me up in the afternoon, saying he wants me to come over. So I ask my sister to watch Erika for a bit and I went over. I arrive, and Luke and I sit down in front of the Wii. Brain Age is in the Wii, so we begin to do a mind sprint. All memorization questions, my favorite subject. I'm focusing on remembering things, birds, faces, and numbers, and he begins to talk. "So Jake..." I'm only half-focusing on what he's saying, as we usual do when we play games. I'm noticing he's not actually even playing though, which starts to worry me. And then he just comes out and says it. "Jake, your sister and I are seeing each other." Yes, Luke and my sister were fucking. All of those times she want out to the "mall" were actually her going to see Luke. I got made, I got really fucking mad. Not only do they do this, they do it behind my back. There was even one day where my sister ditched Erika at Jim's (causing me not to know where she was causing me to freak out) before I got home from work to go out, which was actually to see Luke. Apparently Luke thought that I would take this more calmly than I did. I punched him right in the face and stormed out of the house.
08/13/07(Mon)01:13:25 No.36031381

I'm outside of Luke's house, storming around still pretty pissed (rightfully so though) and then I see a cop car come up the driveway. Oh fuck. They get out, yell at me to put my hands up, so I comply. They put me in handcuffs. "Sir you're not yet under arrest I'm just doing this for my safety." I love how they call you "sir" like they're serving you at a restaraunt. Luke had called the cops on me. He goes and fucks my sister, then he calls the fucking cops on me. So after Luke (his nose was bleeding) and I told our respective sides of the story, the cops decide I'm under arrest. They read me my rights, and off we go. So you've got the guy who just fucked a 13 year old girl, and the guy who punched him the face, and you take away the second guy? I was allowed one phone call, so I called Sharon's house. I picked up the phone, and it was answered, but nobody was speaking. So I assumed it was Erika on the other line. "Erika, get my sister on the phone." Nothing. After saying this a few more times, they tell me I need to hurry it up so I tell Erika this. "Erika, when Sharon comes home tell her..." and I then told her all the info she'll need. So no problem right? Sharon will come home, come down, bail me out, and it'll be fine. I ended up spending the night in the gaol.
08/13/07(Mon)01:13:52 No.36031430

I later learned from Erika that after they arrested me, Luke came to take my sister to his house, and that Sharon called later and said she was staying over with Mark. So my sister left Erika by herself. She says she did fine by herself (she knows her way around the apartment), but it still makes me feel like a failure parent. Saturday was a nice big failure. So we arrive at Sunday, my birthday (I'm now the ripe old age of 20). Did I get my wonderful surprise party? Haha, no. My sister was already gone, so I didn't see her or my parents. They called me later though to chew my ass out for "letting" her see Luke. As if I walked up to them and said "oh hay here's a condom, here's some lube, hope your ED is doing okay Luke bai". Sharon yelled at me too about it, saying I acted irresponsibly. She, the woman who is almost never home to be with the girl who is actually going to end up being her daughter legally because she's off galavanting with her douchebag bf on his douchebag motorcycle, is calling me irresponsible? Now at this point I had a little moral issue. Luke is cheating on Melinda, do I tell her? On one hand, Luke hid all of this from me, fucked my sister, and did tons of shitty things. On the other hand, why do I care? Luke and I are officially not friends now, and this time we probably won't make up. On a third hand, I do believe that if somebody is getting cheated on they deserve to know. And Luke might get kicked out of her house, which is good revenge. On yet another hand, that's sort of petty. On a final hand, I don't actually know if they had sex. But I bet they did. Fucking Luke can't keep his pedophile hands off of her. I gave him a lot of credit. He's done some bad shit before, but I let it slide. Now he's gone too far.
08/13/07(Mon)01:15:27 No.36031617

On a brighter note, possibly one of the greatest things ever happened today. Erika could sense I wasn't having a very good birthday, so she came up to me and gave me an envelope. A card? At this point, I just wanted to kiss Erika. She was the first person to even recognize it was my birthday (seriously, I hadn't even heard the word birthday). I opened up the enevelope, and there was a folded piece of paper inside. It was the the simplest, and the best card I could've ever gotten. On the inside it just said "Happy birthday dad." Yes, it was amazing. Tears wellling up in my eyes, it was a sappy happy moment. I just smiled at her and gave her a huge hug. I know you all probably understand how happy this makes me, it took away the whole sting of the weekend really. I can never replace her old parents, but the fact she recognizes me as her new dad makes everything worth it. It really is pretty amazing, all of this Luke-sister drama doesn't even really matter to me now. I'm starting to think that it may just be like this forever. Erika and I, father and daughter, and every day with her will just be like that. As for my sister and Luke, I don't really care about them anymore. They can do whatever they want, I'm tired of getting involved in everyone else's shit. I'm just going to worry about what's important to me, Erika and myself.
Thread 29
08/14/07(Tue)02:32:15 No.36148569

Hidy-ho /b/, blindmute loli guy present. I went over to Luke's house today (when he wasn't home). Luke and I are officially ex-friends, so I wanted to get all of my shit back, and give him his shit back. I gave him back his 360, and then took every other old system that I had collected over the years (quite a few) and all the games for them and took them back. Melinda was there, and I had the chance to tell her about Luke's cheating. I bit my tongue though. Why? Well, I decided I might as well be peaceful. Let what is be. I had a bit of remorse driving home though. I checked up with Erika on the emo Eric situation. She said that she never sees Eric anymore, and that she preferred it because he smelled (it's true, somebody needs to introduce him to a friend I call deodorant). Threat down. For the most outrageous thing that happened today though, I found out why my sister is a huge bitch. I had a littel talk with her today. It turns out she wasn't seducing Luke because she liked liked Luke. Now get this, a testament to how crazy women can be.
08/14/07(Tue)02:37:22 No.36149049

She was doing it to make her boyfriend jealous. And her boyfriend happened to be the same guy that she got in that accident with. Yeah, it sounds stupid, because it is stupid. They apparently got into a fight before she came here, and she saw that Luke expressed an interest in her, so she thought'd she make a new boyfriend to get back at her current one. And how did it turn out? Her bf that she was with broke up with her, and Luke knows not to even attempt to go near her or he'll be looking at some major shit from my parents. So now she's got nobody. I'm extremely disappointed in her personally, I guess I thought she was little miss innocent because she was my sister. She also must of somehow convinced our parents that it wasn't her fault, because it seems she got off the hook. I know she wouldn't have been on her computer if she had gotten in trouble, but it seems she was. This leaves me a question though. I know I declared Luke and me ex-friends, but there are some things that need to be considered.
08/14/07(Tue)02:38:10 No.36149136

Reasons why I should hate Luke: 1. He fucked my sister. 2. He did all of this behind my back. 3. She was 13, and he did it anyways. 4. He called the cops on me. 5. If he's fucking a 13 year old, how much can I really trust his behavior? Reason why I shouldn't hate Luke: 1. From what I've heard, it seems like my sister was seducing him more than he was preying on her 2. He has been my best friend for a while 3. He did end up telling me, meaning he felt guilty 4. To be fair, I did punch him in the face and had previously beat him with a lamp, so he did have a reason to be scared. 5. He did let me stay with him for a long while As it stands, we're still not friends though and I don't see it changing any time soon. When I told Erika I had no friends though, she reminded me that I was her best friend. Very true.
Thread 30

(copied from a pastebin archive)

If you're reading this you already know who it is so why bother saying it? Anyways, I'll just say it. She's gone, she's fucking gone. Adoption application was rejected. Why? Well Sharon told me that is was my fault, that my little run in with the police was the problem. Well it wasn't, Sharon left out a little bit of information, that her fucking douchebag boyfriend has a bit of a criminal history.

Sharon gets home, pulls me to the side to tell me this. I still can't fucking believe it. They just, stamped some "DENIED" on a goddamn piece of paper and it's over. I had to look at Erika on the couch, perfectly fine going about her business and it was up to me fucking tell her. So I started telling her, and I knew I was breaking. I knew I wasn't going to last any longer. I started crying on her, and when she heard she did the same thing. Sharon just basically pulled her away from me and all I could fucking cry, I barely even said a goodbye. When she left, I just fucking sat there crying like an asshole, and then I became impetuous as I usually am thinking I needed to go kill myself. Of course I didn't, thought it over and thought that it would be okay. Surely there's gotta be some sort of appeal right? Surely I can go see her until then? Surely it'll get sorted out, right?

Well today, nope. I tried asking Sharon if there was anything, she could tell I was miserable and that it was killing. And here's what she fucking said to me. "Jake, maybe it's time you move on." "Jake, you're young, you don't need a kid to worry about." and "Jake, Mark and I are getting married, we want to start our own family." I wanted to strangle Sharon, I really did. I guess that's her opinion of it. Erika was just a phase and now her and I can move on with our lives and do something else. That fucking cunt, she knew it all along. She knew it would be rejected, she wanted it to be. She probably did it herself, that bitch. I hate her. She's going to marry that douchebag. She also said it's time I find another place to stay (in her nice little roundabout cunt way). So yeah, I'm back where I started. No Erika, no house.

I tried going down to the children's home to visit her. THEY FUCKING REJECTED ME. They said that visitation was for potential adopters only, and being that I'm rejected I'm not a potential adopter. That's just all they do is fucking reject and reject. So what does this mean? I'm never going to fucking see her at all again? That last little crying bit was the last I get to see her?

I tried calling Luke, he hates me. He said he doesn't want anything to do with me. He told Melinda himself, and she already forgave him. My little sister doesn't like me much either. My parents are still pissed at me, can't go with them. Sharon basically told me I'm a fucking leech. Mark despises me. Megan's got a new boyfriend and doesn't want anything to do with me. So yeah, there you go. You all win. I know everybody out here reading this, and everybody in the chat enjoys it more when shit goes bad for me then when shit goes good. YOU FUCKING WIN GUYS. Fuck you all. I guess it goes without saying this is the last you'll ever hear of me, I may be in chat or sign onto that aim name if I don't kill myself tonight (it's looking pretty damn good, I have to tell you) but I don't know why I should when all of you just wanted to see my fail. You win, I failed. I get nothing. I hope you enjoy that, I hope you all really do. Sharon, Luke, they all wanted me to fail too. I really do hate the world though, why shouldn't I? What happened to fucking karma? It works in the exact goddamn opposite for me. I try to do nice stuff and all I get is shit. It's over, I won't see her again. I really do feel like just being rid of all of the stupid shit this world has to offer.
Thread 31

Well it's the blindmute loli guy, not dead. Some things happened the night I made my last post, but I don't feel like going into them so I won't. In other news, not much has improved. I spent the whole week sulking, quit my job, went to shit huddled up on Sharon's floor. She put up with me a bit, and then dumped my ass out. So I moved back in my with my parents. That's where I am now, with them with no job. My sister still hates me, and I don't think my parents care for me much either. I talked to them about adopting Erika themselves. They basically told me "no". They like her, but they said they're old. They've already raised their kids, and now they're done. I tried reasoning with them, I tried pulling on every heartstring I could find but it didn't work. I've realized that everybody around me thought the whole thing was a stupid idea in the first place, that nobody ever thought I was a fit parent. I'm not dead, if that's a positive. I haven't seen or talked to Erika since she was taken away. We're now hundreds of miles apart. She probably thinks I've forgotten all about her, that I don't care anymore about her. In actuality I'm killing myself thinking of her constantly, but I can't do anything. Nobody wants to help me at all. I don't think I'll ever have anything else worth reporting, but if anything comes up I'll let everybody know. I think we've been torn apart forever, and honestly I'm going to feel guilty about it forever. I had one chance to do something for her, and I failed. Now she'll just live a shitty life, and it's my fault.
Thread 32
David Sellydud 07/08/29(Wed)21:33 No.12042

A spectre is haunting CPS - a spectre of bureaucratic bullshit.

This is a declaration of war. War, you say? Yes. As you all know, for the last week in a half or so I've been having Emofest 2007. There was baaawing, and there was more baawing. But you already all know this. I'll just get to the point. I'm not giving up. I owe it to Erika and to myself. So what am I doing now? Tomorrow, I'm going down to the orphanage where Erika is at. And I'm not going to ask, I'm going to demand they allow me to see her. Sharon was the one rejected, not me, so they're going to let me see her or I'm going to gather Fred Phelps and the WBC and have a giant bukkake on the face of every staff member there. As you can see, I'm not depressed anymore. It solves nothing at all to sit around crying about things you could probably fix if you got off of your ass and did something. I'm leaving tomorrow and driving down there. As for adopting here, I'm not done yet as far as that goes either. My parents agreed to help me out. How did I convince them? I let them read every post on Wikichan. Yes, I was that desperate. Some parts were a bit painful to have them read, I'm sure they know more about their son than they ever wanted to know now (my father laughed his ass off when he read about my sex (mis)adventure though). "Sometimes the train leaves the station a bit too early Jake. Just be glad you're not my age, sometimes it doesn't leave the station at all."
David Sellydud 07/08/29(Wed)21:34 No.12043

As for those of you who didn't like Luke, he apparently got what he deserves. My sister told me that she heard from Luke (who called her and got her in trouble) that he was kicked out of Melinda's place for telling her about his infidelity. The real kicker: he asked her to move into our house. My sister actually was stupid enough to ask, which resulted in my parents yelling at her for quite a bit. My sis and I have decided to make up though. Sure, she did some stupid shit, but I can relate to that. We still love each other anyways. Basically, things aren't hopeless. Things were never hopeless actually. People have always said you have to work for what you want, and I want Erika. I really really do. If I don't make a fighting effort at this I'm going to regret it forever. Since today I've just been warming up, but now I realize this may be a bit harder than I thought. But I don't care. I'm certainly tired of being a quitter. So CPS better know this: Surrender now or prepare to fight.

(meowth that's right)

PS. I saw the thread on /i/. It was really heart warming, and one of the things that motivated me to get off of my ass. If some random internet people are willing to fight for Erika, then there's no reason I shouldn't. If my plans now fail, I will request /i/'s assistance. But I have to make one last effort by myself. Since you guys really helped me, I decided to post this thread on 420chan as opposed to 4chan. I hope nobody minds.



Thread 33
09/01/07(Sat)02:20:59 No.38064637

Blindmuteloli guy here. As I said, I was going down to the orphanage to visit Erika. I'm still there staying at Melinda's, I don't know when I plan on going back to my parents' place but I've got business here to settle. I went down to the home today, determined to not let my self be turned away. And guess who I saw there? None other than Sharon. I didn't have to talk, she knew exactly what I wanted when I walked in. She said something to one of the workers there, and I was led back to where Erika was. She was being talked to by two staff members. I tapped her on the shoulder and said her name, and she immediately knew who I was. She turned around and practically flung herself at me (not that I minded) and of course reciprocated her hug. "So you must be Jake?" the male staff member said to me. Erika kept tightly clutched to me as I conversed with him. "Uh yeah, how'd you know?" "Erika's told us all about you."
09/01/07(Sat)02:21:25 No.38064686

Sharon then wedged her way into the conversation. "Jake, I have some good news. I have a couple that's interested in Erika." At that point I was thinking "where the fuck are they I'll kill the goddamn bastards". Then I realized the male and female duo that I was talking to weren't staff members. "Jake, I'd like you to meet Sarah and Ryan." Ryan stuck his hand out to shake mine, and I wanted to rip it off. This guy, I could tell what this guy was like. He was one of those uppity pretentious people. He was vegetarian for 2 weeks before he decided he wanted a cheeseburger, he supports recycling (but he doesn't actually take time out of his precious day to do it), he'll talk your head off about global warming before he fires up his fossil fuel emitting car to his job, he thinks he's an activist because he participates in shit like the 5 mile walk to cure breast cancer. Goddamn shithead. In fact I'm going to call him shitead Ryan. I know exactly why Shithead Ryan and his shitheaded ho wanted Erika. They don't even know her, it was just another notch on their "look at me I'm charitable and I do good things" belt.
09/01/07(Sat)02:21:42 No.38064710

They left pretty soon after that, so I took the moment to talk to Sharon about what the fuck was going on (having to pry Erika off of me). "Sharon, who are those people?" "Well Jake they're pre-approved with the agency to adopt a child, and they're interested--" "Why the hell would you let them do that?" And then Sharon hit me with a two ton hammer of reality. "Jake, don't yell at me. I got you in here, and I can have you kicked out. And you don't have a monopoly on this situation so don't act like you do." And she was exactly right. I don't have a monopoly on the whole situation. I was Erika's favorite, but that didn't mean shit. I was nothing, I was the underdog.
09/01/07(Sat)02:22:06 No.38064749

I stayed there a bit with Erika, talking to her about what's been going on. She kept on asking me how I'm coming on adopting her, and I told her that my parents were working on it. I felt bad, she had a huge smile the whole time talking to me, she thought I was coming back to get her (again), and hell I thought I was too. She doesn't even know Shithead Ryan and his bitch can take her any time they want to. Erika told me she doesn't really like them much, sort of saying a "meh" to them and that they try too hard. I can imagine Shithead Ryan now. "WELL HI THERE LITTLE GIRL, YOU WANT US TO BE FRIENDS SO WE CAN HAVE SOME FUN?" in some overly-enthusiastic douchebag voice, like a really bad kids' show. So I don't know what to do now. I can only hope they decide they don't want to adopt, but if they do I don't know. I'm going back to visit her tomorrow of course. I still have a chance, but my parents aren't as far along in the process as Shithead Ryan is. And if she gets adopted by them, I don't know. I'm just hoping it doesn't happen. And I know you all are thinking perverted thoughts about me staying with Melinda. Well nothing has happened that's perverted. She apparently thinks she owes me since Luke fucked my sister, so it worked out. We talked a bit about Luke, I was supportive and gave her a little friendly hug but that's about the most action that will happen tonight. She's been in her room doing whatever she's been doing, and I've been here.
Thread 34
09/02/07(Sun)23:47:33 No.38251486

Hello Colette, this is blindmutecolette guy. For starters, I'll clarify where I'm currently staying since some people don't understand. I've been staying with my parents for a while, but since I intended on seeing Erika at the orphanage I needed some place to stay the night closer to said orphanage. Melinda let me stay with her, I haven't been living with her for very long. Because of the appearance of Ryan, I've needed to make a more extensive stay here so I'm still here. But in actuality, I'm at Jim's tonight, I'll elaborate later. And on another note, I'm thinking of maybe pursuing Melinda. Having a permanent residence near Erika wouldn't be bad at all, and we've always have good chemistry which is why we were drawn together in the first place. With Luke out of the picture, I see no reason why not. I deserve her more than him, and she really is a nice girl. I think she likes me as well, since she seems to have made an odd attempt at trying to seduce me or something. You see, today when I woke up Melinda was already awake. As I come out of the bathroom, she approaches me holding a pair of her panties. Then she says she found them under the bed I'm sleeping in (and I didn't actually steal them). She acts psuedo-angry, and then asks me why I would steal her panties, I supposed expecting me to say "Melinda I'm so deeply attracted to you" and take her right then. I just said "I didn't take them", so she walked away. A bit awkward...
09/02/07(Sun)23:48:20 No.38251540

went to visit Erika today. When I saw her though, I immediately knew something was wrong. We talked a bit before I asked her what was wrong. She told me Sharon told her that Shithead Ryan was going to adopt her. Eruika asked me if this was true, hoping I would say "of course not". Sadly I couldn't say that. I explained the situation to her fully, and she got pretty mad. She ripped the ring that I gave her off of her finger and threw it down on the ground. Erika usually doesn't have a bad temper like that, but she feels pretty strongly about it. So I gave her a hug and told her I was doing my best, and she apologized and put it back on. When I was leaving, I was approached by Sharon. Jim had called her earlier in the day apparently still thinking that I was living there, and asked me to babysit. Since I was back in town now, Sharon asked me if I would do it. I couldn't refuse Jim considering all of the times he helped me out, so I told Melinda I'd be out and then I went off to Jim's house to babysit. Melanie and Amelia were a bit disappointed, they were expecting Erika to come along with me. I'm still here babysitting, Jim and his wife should be back soon. Nothing too interesting, except I think Melanie has a little crush on me, but I've suspected that for a while. She's been making cute little flirtacious gestures, put on perfume and such, trying to ask me probing questions. I found it amusing, but I'm not a total sexual deviant so I didn't stick it in the pooper.
09/02/07(Sun)23:48:44 No.38251575

So I've been here at Jim's babysitting, hopefully he'll return home soon enough. Anyway, I'd like to talk about something else before I end this post. People are trying to spread my story to the media and whatever. You all can do whatever you want, I can't stop you, but I would personally request that you don't. Honestly, I just think that attention might turn against me rather than go for me. They'd rather report about a vicious panty sniffing sex toy shop going 16 year old girl fucking sexual deviant predator than a young girl united with a wholesome person. And as for the news friendly version (which isn't even that news friendly considering a lot of the stuff that was left in it), I don't really think that needs to be done. I just had something happen to me that I thought Chanada might want to know about, never wanted to get on Bill O'Reilly. So yeah, I really do appreciate the idea but I don't think it would work in my favor in the end. But if I really had no other way, I might consider it, but I'm still working on getting her through CPS. And even if I was going to share my story, I wouldn't cut anything out. I just write about what happened as it happened, if people don't like things I did then I don't really care. So I appreciate it, but I think you should cool it down before it blows up in my face (and things have a habit of doing that to me).
Thread 35
09/06/07(Thu)01:33:51 No.38568973

Hello everybody, Jake here. I guess to start off I'll say Melinda and I have sort of a thing going on. She didn't explicitly say anything, but she did say it would be okay if I wanted to stay "a while longer". Don't know when I intend to make an official move, but she's been being very nice to me recently, I'm almost one hundred percent sure she's interested.

On Monday, I went down to the orphanage. I had gone there Sunday too, but it was just a pleasant visit where nothing much happened. I hadn't seen Ryan in recent memor, so I thought that he had perhaps lost interest and was pretty hopeful on that. As I arrived on Monday, that wasn't so. Ryan was there with his gf. And then Sharon said it. "Sure, she can go with you today..." Exactly what I feared was happening. I thought I had to act, do something. Erika looked like she was on the verge of having a major tantrum, maybe I could exploit that? And then I had a realization. I was being pretty selfish. I wanted Erika to be my daughter, with good intentions, but at the same time I realized that going with Ryan was best for her. If she waited for me, it could be months or even years before she got out of the children's home, at least with Ryan she'd have a good home now. And whether she wanted it or I wanted it or not, it was going to happen and there wasn't a thing I could do about it.
09/06/07(Thu)01:35:46 No.38569112

Sharon finally noticed me there, and began to get distraught herself. I looked at her though, not in a menacing way, and she knew I was going to be okay about this. I went to Erika, and upon saying hi to her she jumped to clutch onto me and cry on me. I bent down and began rubbing her head a bit, "What's wrong?" (not that I didn't know). She pointed directly at Ryan. "Ryan's going to take you home, but it'll be okay, he's a good guy. You're going to get out of this place, isn't that good?" She picked up the notebook to write something but she was getting tears all over the paper so it wasn't very legible. I knew what she was thinking though. "It's okay, we will see each other again. I'll see you a lot, I promise. I need you to settle down a bit now though." I held her for a bit, and she finally calmed down. Ryan tried to comfort her, but she swiped at him with her hand. "Erika, don't do that. I need you to be good for Ryan, okay?" At this point tears were forming in my eyes again. Part of me thought I was being stupid, but the right part of me knew I was doing what's best. She finally completely settled, and Ryan was ready to take her. I sighed because I didn't know what else to do but leave. Erika waved a little goodbye at me, but I told her that it wasn't goodbye, that I'd see her soon. I didn't know if that was true though, until I started walking away. Ryan stopped me. "Hey Jake, why don't you come visit some time?" He gave me his phone number and address, and left with Erika who I could tell was still a bit reluctant but was starting to understand. Sharon asked me if I was okay, and I had to smile a bit.
09/06/07(Thu)01:36:10 No.38569148

I don't know still if I made the right choice, but I think I did. I called Ryan on Tuesday to see how things were going, and told him if he ever needed a babysitter I'd be available any time. He said I could come visit any time I want. Maybe he's not such a shithead after all. Maybe. I think it worked out better than it could've though. Sometimes you have to give up the people you love if you really want what's best for them I suppose. And I didn't give her up anyways, by no means is this the end of our relationship. Don't know if this will be the last thread, but I know one thing: I'm going to visit Erika very soon.
Thread 36
09/09/07(Sun)23:21:15 No.39003935

Hidy-ho /b/, it's blindmuteloli guy. Erika is still at Ryan's. I did get to visit her however. When I walked into the house, she was on the couch doing much of nothing. I said "hi", and she immediately recognized my voice and perked up to see me. Erika began walked over to me, but she didn't know the layout of Ryan's house very much so she tripped on a piece of his furniture and fell down. I could've sworn at that moment I saw a small smirk from Ryan, like he thought it was funny. It could just be me seeing things though. I helped her up and she gave me a nice hug, which Ryan made sure to cut short by grabbing her arm and suggesting to her she show me her room. So she did just that. We went up the stairs to her dwellings. It's a pretty nice, fairly large house, not as nice or big as Melinda's, but not bad. Her room is pretty plain looking, not much in it. As Erika was showing me around, Ryan made sure to follow me around and breathe down my neck. I'm pretty sure he was trying to discourage me from visiting again. I don't care much what he does.
09/09/07(Sun)23:22:07 No.39003990

His fiancee (grammar lesson: fiance is a man you plan to marry, fiancee is a woman you plan to marry) was nicer to me, offering me something to drink. She seems like an actual sweet person, I hope Ryan isn't a douche to her. I'm starting to feel like he only invited me to visit because he was pressured by her though. Erika told me that she really doesn't like it at Ryan's though. I told her she'd get used to it eventually, and that I wouldn't stop visiting her. I know what you're all thinking, but it's all I really can do. On the plus side though, Ryan and his fiancee are taking a weekend trip this weekend. And since Erika can't go, they've decided to leave her with me for the weekend. Why they would schedule a trip right after they adopted a new daughter, I have no idea. I don't mind them being absentee parents though, as long as I get to fill in. It should be fun for both of us, I was thinking Melanie and Amelia could stay the night one day too, so she can see them. So yeah, I'm still on the fence about them. Ryan, I don't know about. His fiancee seems okay, Erika says she's okay and at least nice. She's not being chained up in the basement though, so that's good. I guess it's better than where she was, but she did have her heart set on staying with me. Guess it's how things gotta be. I really hope she gets over being depressed about it though. Maybe staying with me for a weekend will cheer her up, or make her want to stay with me permanently more. I wonder sometimes if she doesn't sit up and cry in her bed or something when she's going to sleep, I try not to think about things like that. It's getting to me though, I must admit, not having her around.
Thread 37
09/16/07(Sun)00:52:22 No.39597448

Hello slashbeeslash, it is the blindmuteloli man here for another update. As you all know, Erika was coming over for the weekend. And that she did. Everything was good on Friday. Erika came over (Jim's kids couldn't make it, so it was just her and I). Ryan had to be a huge douchebag about it though, making sure to fully inspect Melinda's house before leaving Erika there. It was okay though, once he was gone we had a great time. We played checkers, watched tv, did any of the usual things we usually would. It was great having her around, and it was looking to be an awesome weekend having her around the whole time. I made sure she was fed, she took a bath. I asked her if she wanted my help (since she hadn't been in Melinda's bathroom much) but she stated very quickly she could do it herself. They grow up so fast. We talked about Ryan, and she said she still doesn't like him much but things are going okay. She's starting to warm up to his girlfriend it seems though, a bit. She didn't make any mean quips about her. Or it could just be Ryan's douchebaggery eclipses that of those around him. She cuddled right up to me on the couch, and Erika quickly grew tired. So I put her to bed, promising her we'd do plenty on Saturday and Sunday, which brought a smile to her face. I thought about us going out somewhere, we had to, right?
09/16/07(Sun)00:53:56 No.39597566

So it's about 1 am. I'm still up because I usually am, Erika is sound asleep. I hear a knock on the door. I go into ultra-paranoid mode, and I go down the stairs thinking it could be some thief/rapist/murderer/jehovah's witness at the door. As I reach the door, I grab my trusty weapon Melinda's lamp and opened the door. And what I saw was more horrible than any thief, rapist, murderer, or jehovah's witness: It was Ryan. His trip got cancelled. "I came to pick up Erika, our trip got cancelled." "You couldn't wait til morning?" I asked. "I thought it'd be better to get her now." he replied. "She's already asleep, do you have to wake her up?" I asked again of him. "I don't want to come all the way over here again tomorrow." he retorted. To which I offered, "I'll drive her over to your place tomorrow." To which he ended our conversation with, "Are you trying to kidnap her or something? Should I call the police?" Dick. So I went in and woke Erika up, who was not pleased. She wanted to go hug me goodbye at least in her groggy state, but Ryan said "You can talk to Jake later" and scuddled her away. Weekend ruined.
Thread 38
40346683

Writing threads by moonlight
Winning loli by daylight
Never run from an easy fight
He is the one named Sailor Jake
He might turn his back on his friends
Rarely lasts until the very end
Oh god is he the one on which you depend? (You're fucked)
He is the one named Sailor Jake
He is the one named SAILOR JAKE

Well I think that serves as an adequate introduction. Now to bidness. Ryan has reached far more epic levels of faggotry than ever assumed possible. I overheard him possibly discussing getting a restraining order on me with his gf. Was he kidding? Maybe, he's still a douche though. Erika's starting to get affected by him though. She's not as happy as usual. I can't describe it, but she's losing her usual chipperness. Eventually she'll adjust though, she'll have to.
40347075

Well I think that serves as an adequate introduction. Now to bidness. Ryan has reached far more epic levels of faggotry than ever assumed possible. I overheard him possibly discussing getting a restraining order on me with his gf. Was he kidding? Maybe, he's still a douche though. Erika's starting to get affected by him though. She's not as happy as usual. I can't describe it, but she's losing her usual chipperness. Eventually she'll adjust though, she'll have to. In other news, I'm back to living with Luke. Now how would this be, you would ask. Well he got back together with his furry girlfriend, who is a fursuiter. I've mentioned her in the chat a few times. They came to Melinda offering to pay rent to stay at her place, and she gladly agreed. I didn't think she'd want Luke being near her at all, but apparently she takes a different perspective on it. She told me that she loves to "exploit that fat ass and his weird bitch girlfriend". Luke has gladly taken the opportunity to flaunt around he has a girlfriend (even if she is a slightly overweight furry with weird hair), so Melinda and I have fought back a bit acting like a couple too. The house has sort of become a war zone, with both "couples" (well I don't know if me and Melinda are taking it seriously) trying to outdo each other. Luke and his gf have even made out right at the table. Imagine this: two fat seals trying to have a wrestling match. Blubber slapping against blubber. The two gelatinous forms come together, and they melt into some haze of lard, where the lines of individuality blur and it's impossible to tell them both apart. It's like something right out of the End of Evangelion. Icky gross. Melinda did in fact kiss me on the lips though (not for very long though). I don't know if she's doing it just as part of our little "war" or if she's serious.
40347146

We both got invites to another event too... Sharon and Mark's wedding. Yes, she's settling for that douchebag. I was thinking I might bring Ryan, but by their powers combined they might form some Captain Faggotry and pollute the world with their filfth. I have a feeling somehow though that Jim made her invite me. I've been seeing a lot more of Jim's kids too, since he needs a lot of babysitting done. Melanie I think has still taken a bit of a liking to me, she's always asking me about Melinda. Amelia asks me everytime if I've brought Erika over, which I always have to sadly say no to, since Ryan refuses. She agrees with me that he should be impaled on a spike. Oh, if only. I'm pretty sure I can hear Luke fucking his girlfriend (who I hope isn't wearing the suit) right now. If them kissing looks like seals wrestling, then them having sex would look two manatees engaging in some ancient tribal cannibalistic ritual. I just hope they don't break Melinda's bed. And for the record, I have never posted at 7chan. Haha kirby! I have ruined the plan you may or may not have.
Thread 39
Anonymous 09/26/07(Wed)00:39:36 No.40658859

Hello hello /b/, blindmute loli guy here again. I haven't gotten to see Erika since my last post (Ryan making excuses why I can't), so nothing to report there. I could say he's a douche, but that's not only stating the obvious but being redundant. Haven't heard anything about a restraining order yet though, I wouldn't put it past him to try however. As you know, Luke and his furry gf have been staying with Melinda and myself for a bit now. One of these days it's late at night, I just woke up from falling asleep. I hear noises from Luke's room. So I'm giggling and getting all giddy like a schoolgirl since haha it's Luke and his fat furry girlfriend and they're having sex teehee. So I decide to do a little bit of sneaking around. Crouching down, I creep through the hallway, silent as Daniel Benoit and as swift as 747. And then I crept my way up to the door, to see that it wasn't Luke's furry girlfriend. Guess who was getting toasted like a Poptart by Luke? None other than Melinda. It was one of those sitcomish moments though, where a character sees something obvious before them and they take a few seconds to realize it, then go "wait a nigger lynching second..." and it hits them. Now you see any logical person would've realized this. It doesn't make much sense at all that an ex-boyfriend would decide to move into his ex-girlfriend's house when there are multiple other housing options available.
Anonymous 09/26/07(Wed)00:40:04 No.40658916

I walked away, and neither of them saw me. So I suppose this means my chances with Melinda are done, I'm out, Luke's in. As for furrybitch I don't know where she stands, maybe Luke is trying to build up some sort of harem. I should have learned by now that any girl I try go after is going to ignore me for their ex-boyfriend it seems. Maybe it will be a lesson that sticks this time. Indeed, this update is quite short, but I thought it was something funny and/or pathetic you all might like to hear about. I wish I had more about Erika to say, but Ryan just seems to be getting worse with his shit. It just doesn't seem like she's adjusting very well to him, but I suppose these things take time. She'll get used to him eventually, she may never like him, but there's not that can be done really.
Thread 40
Anonymous 09/30/07(Sun)00:32:07 No.41092461

Blindmute loli guy here. I have something serious to discuss, but it's a bit hard to talk about. I've debated if it's something that I should even make a thread about it, but I've decided to. I went over to Ryan's house to see Erika. She greeted me as I arrived, I tried to give her a hug, but she pulled away from me. Odd, but I thought she may just not be in a touchy mood. As they day went on though, she wouldn't let me touch at all, pulling away whenever I would try to. I was a bit frustrated, but I decided just to not touch her and not push the issue. So the day went as usual, I went home after a bit, and continued with my usual business.
Anonymous 09/30/07(Sun)00:33:57 No.41092592

But as I was home, it stuck with me. Something just seemed out of place. And then it hit me, and I didn't like what had hit me. I went back the next idea, even though Ryan said it wouldn't be a good day to come. I came anyway, and Ryan was not happy to see me. Looking at Erika, I asked her to show me her back. She hesitated, and then refused. I asked her again to just show me a little bit, and eventually she did, and I saw exactly what I didn't want to see. An ugly looking bruise. It wasn't the only one though, as she lifted it up more there were more bruises, marks all over her. I knew exactly who did it once I saw them, and I really was fucking pissed. I went right for Ryan, who was in the other room, and I probably could've stabbed him right there. If you haven't been paying attention, I just found out Ryan was physically abusing Erika, she had bad bruises and marks all over her. I grabbed Ryan, pinned him up against a wall, and was just screaming at him. His girlfriend was getting frenzied, trying to pull me away from him, and I almost hit her. I let him go though, and tried to cool down, breaking tons of his crap in the process. I realized that this was probably very much upsetting Erika though, so I tried to really calm down. Ryan had a look the whole time like he was going to die, as he should've since he was very close. I went to their phone to call CPS, and his gf for a second tried to convince me not to.
Anonymous 09/30/07(Sun)00:34:18 No.41092624

And then I realized something else: he does it to her too. I hated him, I still hate him, I will always hate him. CPS said they'd "investigate the matter". And I was pretty much shocked that this was all that they could offer me, a visit promised to occur within the next few DAYS when I specifically said it was urgent. So I called the police, who actually arrived. And then I saw that Ryan who was in the living room when I last saw him had left when I was on the phone. I threw his phone up against the wall and it shattered into pieces, but I looked at Erika and she was crying her eyes out. I wrapped my arms around her, trying not to hurt anything, and told her that I hoped I didn't scare her. The police came, and both I and Ryan's girlfriend gave our sides of the story. And that bitch actually had the nerve to claim that it was ME that did it. And of course the police not knowing anything about it really, could only put equal weight on both stories. Erika had become sort of out of it at that point, she wasn't able to write anything and wasn't responding in any way to what the officers were saying. She gave slight nods to some questions but they still couldn't make much of what she was trying to convey. They did agree though that for Erika's safety, she should be removed from Ryan's house at least for the moment until more conclusive proof can be given. This relieved me a bit, that they were going to do something.
Anonymous 09/30/07(Sun)00:34:46 No.41092668

Once Erika was better at CPS, she revealed the whole story. Ryan would hit her sometimes, sometimes trip her while she was walking, and things I wouldn't want to go into detail to. Nothing sexually abusive though, which was slightly another relief. Then he would tell her that if she told anybody, he wouldn't let her see me anymore. So basically he used me against her. I still feel terrible about it. The only reason he was letting me see her is because he could do this to her. His gf I imagine wouldn't want to press charges against him, but that doesn't mean he gets off scot-free for sure. He came back to his place at night, and was arrested, and is awaiting a trial. The only thing is that if he was to get convicted of anything, Erika would probably have to testify against him at a trial. I don't know if she would want to do that. I'm hoping that it doesn't get to be something publicly known, I wouldn't want to put Erika through that. Only Ryan, his gf, me, CPS, and the police know to the extent of my knowledge, I haven't told anybody else. Ryan or his gf better not, but that wouldn't be something they would want to do anyway. Erika's been at CPS ever since, I'm hoping she isn't severely traumatized by this, but I know she won't be the same for a while. I still don't get it, why anybody would want to do something like that. Sometimes, I really just think humans are disgusting.


Thread 41
Anonymous 10/03/07(Wed)01:32:19 No.41449662

Hello /b/, blindmute loli guy here for the 41st thread. The good news: Erika isn't at CPS anymore. The bad news: She isn't with me. I'll elaborate on that, even though that good news is anything but. I've been visiting Erika for a while now, I could tell she wasn't very happy at all, pretty pissed about the whole thing with good reason of course. I tried to be supportive but I can only visit for so much time a day and she wasn't being very talkative. I just had an inkling of a feeling that she was about to crack. I mean, how much can one 9 year old take? Your parents die, you get sent to CPS, the series of events that happened to her must be chipping away at her I thought. I go to visit Erika at the home where she usually was, except she's not there that particular day. I learn where she is, and ask where I would find it. CPS gives me a little "I'm sorry but we can only release that information to a parent or guardian blah blah..." So I have to go to Sharon to get that info, who is with Mark. Sharon refuses, giving me that same little response CPS gave me. So I pull Sharon aside, threatening to tell Mark about the night we spent together. "What night!? There wasn't any!" And then I smiled, "But there could be..." Then my cunting plan was dismantled. "You know if you said that Mark would probably just beat you up?" Oh yeah. My first plan failed, so I resorted to begging and guilt tripping. Success! After I bothered her enough, she told me what I wanted.
Anonymous 10/03/07(Wed)01:33:17 No.41449757
Blindmute Loli - Thread 41 by ~Dark-Pen

Now at this point, I imagine you're wondering where was Erika if she wasn't where she usually is. She was at mental hospital. What happened? Well Sharon said that Erika sort of cracked a bit. One of the usual kids was bullying her, and she couldn't take it anymore. So apparently when they were doing some art project or something with scissors. Erika got his attention, he asked her what the hell she wanted, and she tried to stab him. And not just like a prick, like really trying to kill him. She wasn't successful of course, she actually did get him once (but it's not a serious bruise, they were only scissors intended to be used by children). They pulled her off of him, and that was the end of that assassination attempt. CPS got its knickers in a bunch, and that's how Erika ended up where she is. Now by now I'm sure you've noticed I'm not taking this very seriously. And I don't, it was a pair of scissors! I mean they were sharp and probably could've caused some injury if she had stabbed him enough, but still. At the same time though I do recognize something is wrong with Erika, not that she's suffering from Hinamizawa Syndrome, but that the Ryan thing did really affect her. Maybe it could be beneficial, but probably not. They said though that people don't usually stay in them very long, 1-2 weeks usually. And it's not like they think she's dangerous and crazy either, just angry, depressed, and needing a bit of a diagnosis. Of course then again Erika is under the control of the state, which I think probably wanted to put her there because their homes are crowded. At least, according to Sharon, Ryan has dropped all claims of being Erika's guardian, which is a good thing. Beyond that, neither of us knows his current situation.
Anonymous 10/03/07(Wed)01:33:36 No.41449785

So I went to visit Erika at her new place of residence, where I was informed that visiting days are only Saturdays and Sundays. I tried, but they wouldn't let me in at all. They did tell me that all patients get one 5 minute phone call a day, and offered to have me leave my number... which really helps because she's mute, right? Fucking idiots. I'm trying not to freak out over the whole thing, because really it's not good. Erika is really depressed, I can't do anything for her, the next time I can visit is on Saturday and Sunday, Ryan is probably already back at his house fucking his girlfriend, and fuck fucking fuck. The only thing I can do is try to remain calm and optimistic until Saturday and Sunday, then go to visit. Personally though, I think the little asshole kid that Erika tried to kill deserved to get put back in his place. Not killed, but I have a feeling that if Erika goes back to CPS nobody's going to be botheing her anymore. And of course that means she's open to be adopted again, however I can't start that until she's out of the hospital. Now the good news is, I can adopt Erika, in my own name if the opportunity comes up. Now the key word is "can", implying possibility not probability. Really you can adopt if you're an adult, of course the younger you are the more trouble you have. However, I've been following this for a while now, surely somebody must have taken note of how much I've been around Erika and trying, and all of the other stuff I've been doing, at least in a small footnote on whatever info they have on me. It never was so much that it was impossible for me to adopt her, more that it was so unlikely it was no use in bothering. But I have grown another year older, I'm 20, so it may be possible, and the child's preference does have weight in the process. Erika may be a bit angry right now, but she told me she wasn't mad at me, even if she was only saying it for my benefit it's good enough.
Thread 42
10/07/07(Sun)00:20:28 No.41908181

Hi ho again /b/, Blindmute loli guy here for another thread. Before I get to what happened when I visited Erika, I'll talk about something else. It seems that Luke and I have semi-reconciled. Not really, but kind of. It all started when we happened to be sitting on the couch together. We had a "I'm taking my ball and I'm going home and I'm not being your friend anymore" pouty vibe between us, awkward it was. Then I grabbed it*, and leaned forward*, and he began pounding me*. That aside, he beat me in the first round by using that cheap leg sweep move. Playing as Liu Kang, I decided to maintain my distance. He jumped to try and get over to me to get me in sweep range, so I denied him with an air fireball, then a flying bicycle kick. He recovered though, and managed to get me into a sweep. I was too far back though, so he lost me in a few sweeps, and with a few more moves ended the round in my favor. With the third round, I managed to string together a chain of flying kicks, then uppercut him for the win. I gave him Liu Kang's dragon fatality. We ended up playing about 50 more matches, the record in my favor but pretty close. At the very least, it was the friendliest conatct we've had in a while. Still, I have to listen to him and Melinda have sex. His ED is now fix'd, now his penis is a stale pancake standing tall in the wind. More importantly, I did go to visit Erika today. When I arrived, the person working there said since I had no relation to Erika I wouldn't be allowed. All I had to do was get a bit pissy though, and she acquiesced (thank you /wooo/ for reminding me of how cool that word is) with an apathetic "fine", and let me go in. There was Erika, dressed in traditional mental patient garb. The floppy green slippers, the hospital-ish light blue pants, and the white shirt that ties in the back. I have to admit, it was sort of cute, but her expression wasn't very cute at all.

* the Sega Genesis controller * to turn on the system, which had Mortal Kombat II in it * at Mortal Kombat, with Baraka
10/07/07(Sun)00:20:49 No.41908223

There were a few chairs set out in a hallway, and I conversed with her. I had to be extra pissy just to get a pen for her to write with (pens are a nono there, they think the patients are going to go around stabbing people, and some of them might). Which brings us to probably the shittiest part of the whole thing. She has no writing utensils, so basically no way of communicating with anybody there except for some basic hand motions. She doesn't know sign language, and I imagine if she did nobody there would know it anyway. Wonderful, isn't it? In other news, the only other complaint that she had is that it's pretty boring. The other kids don't bother her (because most of them are probably so drugged up), they just think of her as the weird girl who can't talk it seems. Food is also bad, but that's to be expected. She introduced me to her roomates too (everyone else in the same wing as her was a female under the age of 10 of course). Jennifer, who seemed pretty normal (though I didn't ask why she was in a mental hospital), and Danielle (who seemed a bit "slow"). I didn't see much of them though. Erika also said that Danielle has a hard time getting to sleep, and likes to pound on the walls when it's time. This is the most I could get out of her in the time I was allowed to visit. Before I left, I did ask if she would be getting out any time soon. According to them, release is at the discretion of the child's assigned doctor who will visit the wing once a week or so. Not very comforting. And since I'm not her parent/guardian and have no legal rights on her behalf, my opinion doesn't mean shit to them. So not really good news, except for the fact that my stay at Melinda's place might give me stable housing.
Thread 43
Anonymous 10/12/07(Fri)01:03:13 No.42510611

Hello /b/, blindmuteloli guy here. It's been a bit, and in this time I haven't seen Erika at all (discounting today). Yes, she's been released, they said there was no reason to keep her as she showed no signs of furthering agression. So, she returned again to CPS. Sharon called me to tell me, so I went right over to visit her. She was pleased at my visit, and I thought she'd be more overjoyed at the news I gave her, that I was planning on trying to adopt her again. Instead, she just sort of acted like she was thinking in her mind "That's what you said the last three times." Ouch. I know she's not mad at me though, I hope she's not anyway. I know she's getting a bit tired of all that's been going on as anybody would, but I'm just hoping soon enough I'll adopt her and everything will return to a peaceful existence. Everyday though (oh no OP is getting sappy), even as things get harder I only love her more and more. I know she knows that, and despite everything she puts her trust in me. I'll never stop trying my absolute best to protect her, you can all be assured of that. I did have to tickle her a bit though to get a smile, I warned her though.
Anonymous 10/12/07(Fri)01:05:16 No.42510810

(Note: was part of above entry, but reposted 2 minutes 3 seconds later.)

Speaking of protection though, it seems nobody wants to mess with Erika after what happened. Since she got back, nobody talks to her, and people seem a bit uneasy around her. I suppose she showed them. She did tell me something however, one of the reasons why the kids didn't like her very much. She said they're jealous, because they don't have any parents yet I act like Erika's parent. They tell her to go live with me and quit bothering them. And even though they were mean to Erika, I still feel bad for them all. You can see it in them, behind every sad visage, a sadder story. It makes me wish I could get to know them all, but you can't solve all of the world's problems I suppose, only do what you can.
Anonymous 10/12/07(Fri)01:06:02 No.42510888

In other news, Sharon's been trying to do research on Erika's parentage. In my mind, they're dead and that's the end of it (not nice I know but facts are facts). Sharon has been snooping around, finding people that match Erika's last name (it's not actually all that common). She found one guy who's in prison for murder and a rapist. I think sometimes her imagination runs away with her. I asked her if she asked Erika about it at all, and she said no as she didn't want to bring such a touchy subject up. It does make me wonder where her other relatives are, she's got to have a few living I would think (I could be wrong about that though, I don't know for sure). It doesn't much matter to me anyway though, I for one think the past, like Jews, should remain buried (*rimshot*). As for Ryan, I don't much about what's going on with him. Sharon's usually a valuable source of inside info, but of course she's not in any way related to the criminal justice system. Honestly, my worst nightmare is that he got off with almost no punishment (which is more likely than you think) and one of these days I'm going to see him strolling down the street and have to resist the urge to kick his balls up his asshole. A peculiarity though, is that I got a call from his girlfriend hopefully ex-girlfriend today. I picked up and she started to talk, but then she hung up. I don't exactly know what she would want to talk to me about, but it's actually been stirring my interest for a bit. I'm still wondering if she'll call back. As another peculiarity my nosy self noticed, my sister is still talking to Luke. He left his computer unlocked while he went to take a shit, so I snooped around on his computer (usually when I see any unlocked computer I just can't resist looking). Looking at his buddy list, my sister's sn was still on there, and the logs between the two were pretty recent. Luke and I have started getting semi-friendly though, so I don't want to go accusing him of anything. I didn't get to read to deeply into their logs, so I didn't get to see much actually. Of course I'm probably concerning myself too much with the lives of others. Especially my sister who still doesn't like me very much. My parents have actually started being more strict with her, they made her get an STD and pregnancy test (so much for innocent little sister), and aren't letting her go out doing what she wants anymore.
Anonymous 10/12/07(Fri)01:06:29 No.42510932

Melinda still doesn't seem annoyed at my presence either, she's even starting to like Jim's kids. Jim is still requesting that I watch his kids every so often, despite Melanie's insistence that they can manage themselves (not that I mind helping him out), and instead of me going over there he usually brings them here. Except for emo Eric that is, who according to Jim got suspended from school for threatening some other kid. I find it odd that parents seem to bring up their child's faults as much as their acheivements in small talk, or maybe that's just Jim. Melanie seemingly doesn't like me anymore though, as she matter-of-factly told me that she has a new boyfriend now and I'm through. Oh well. Both Amelia and Melanie were excited that Erika was out of the hospital though, they were pretty concerned about the whole matter. I didn't actually tell them the full story behind it with Ryan and such, but they were still fairly upset.
Thread 44
Anonymous 10/14/07(Sun)00:06:47 No.42718671

Hallo there /b/, blindmute loli guy back to update. Still going to visit Erika, and she's actually been a bit more talkative. She's been talking about a new kid who just arrived. Good that she has somebody else besides me who she can talk to. A lot of people don't want to take the time to communicate with her, since it involves reading (if only she could communicate through television, she'd probably be much more popular). Getting the adoption paperwork and stuff going... again. I've actually done it so often now it feels a bit routine. And it won't be the first time many of the people I have to talk to see me in their offices. Is that a benefit or a detriment, who knows? The real thing that happened today was that I got a call from Ryan's former girlfriend. This time she didn't hang up, she asked me to come over. I had my suspicions, but you know what they say, curiousity kills the cat, and nyaah~ I went because mine was aroused. I went over there, and suddenly as I was at the doorstep I began to become paranoid. I realized it: they were trying to kill me. Ryan was behind that door, he had used his innocent sounding little girlfriend to lure me over, so he could murder me. He was waiting, just behind the door when I opened it, to stab me with, or perhaps bludgeon me. Or maybe when I opened the door a shotgun shell would pierce my stomach. Maybe his girlfriend would put on a strap-on and slowly rape my asshole as I bled to death from a gunshot wound. Maybe she'd act all sweet, offer me a drink. With poison in it, that is! What to do? To go in, or not to go in. To take arms against a sea of rape. But I had to go in, even if it death would await me. I knocked on the door, and I was greeted by Ryan's gf... and nothing happened.
Anonymous 10/14/07(Sun)00:07:46 No.42718784

Until, that is, I sat down on the couch. She threw herself on me, except instead of doing something fun like giving me a lap dance she started crying on me. Apologizing about what happened to Erika, how she didn't say anything, how he beat her, pouring her heart out to me. On one hand this woman was apologizing and letting me in on her emotions, on the other hand it was like "DO NOT WANT". She continued crying, so I tried to comfort her (at the very least so she'd quit crushing my balls). Eventually she got off of me, and sat next to me on the couch. She just said she wanted to express how sorry she was about the whole thing. Then she insisted I stay for dinner. I really didn't want to, but she insisted. So I had no choice, seeing that she was trying to be nice to me. Over dinner, she confessed to me that she had an alternative reason for calling me over. She was scared of Ryan. She apparently hasn't seen him for a while, but thinks he might not be in a prison or a jail, and might to try to kill her and then steal her nanomachines (in that order). She asked me to stay the night too. I wondered at that moment if she didn't have a brother or some shit. So I pondered it, and said yes. I didn't particularly want to, but I would've felt bad leaving her there if her worries have any legitimacy. Yep, that's where I am now. Nothing has happened, she's asleep, I'm here on her computer, trying to download some anime to watch. Called Melinda and Luke to tell them I wouldn't be home, not that they much cared.
Thread 45
Anonymous 10/17/07(Wed)01:52:14 No.43036850

Hey there /b/, blindmute loli guy with another update. Since the last you've heard of me, I was staying over at Ryan's house, keeping watch for none other than Ryan himself. Wee in the morning (as in 2-3 am), I heard a scratch scratch scratching at my door. Say did I "Go away you stupid whore", for Ryan's departure I did implore, but upon opening my door, I saw only the vastness of night, and nothing more. But upon going to lay once more, I saw a cat I did deplore, eyes full of malignancy my shirt it tore, and I shall stop the rhyming heretofore. But yes, if you didn't get it the first time it was a random cat scratching at the door. I opened it up to see what it was, and the little bastard snuck right in then settled down on the couch I was sleeping on. I tried to get it to go back outside, and it scratched me. So being a man of peace and not of war, I slept on the floor.
Anonymous 10/17/07(Wed)01:53:00 No.43036910

Fortunately however, that cat was the most action I had that night. Sarah made me some breakfast and I departed. Last I checked the cat was still there, I don't know what she did with it but I don't much care. I went back to Luke and Melinda's, and found the door unlocked, so I walked right in. I yelled around a bit, but nobody was there. And then I walked in the living room, and saw it on my couch. No, not the cat. A person, a person I didn't want to see. "Oh shit" is what I thought right when I saw them, and knew I was in for some trouble. It was my older sister. Amelia (this is my older sister's name, it's also the name of Jim's youngest child, but they're different) was sitting there on the couch. "What are you doing here!?" And she explained it thusly: She was home visiting. My little sister has appeared missing. My parents called Melinda's house (since this is where they've last known I lived, sometimes they can't keep up with my moving), and Melinda said that Luke was missing too. Which leads me to one conclusion, that they're both missing together. And my parents sent my older sister to try to find her, who came to me. At first I refused to help, since it's not my job to solve everybody's problems right? I don't want to go on some wild chase for my sister today, I wanted to go visit Erika, go about my day. But then she started getting bitchy. "Have a job yet?", "Applied to any schools yet?" I knew she wasn't going to stop until I agreed to help her. Bitch.
Anonymous 10/17/07(Wed)01:53:16 No.43036926

So we started off, trying to find them without any idea where they would be. She asked me if I had any ideas, and I pondered. And then I remembered. A vision from the Gods. A bit ago, Luke had went to an anime convention. He spoke very highly of the hotel he stayed out. So I thought, "Surely this must be where they were!". It was pretty far away, but we drove all the way there. So I waltzed right in, thought I'd talk a bit, smooth things over, and everything would be good. I wasn't even intending on kicking Luke's ass, for some reason despite having to listen to my bitch sister all the way there I was in a good mood. A mood to make it so everything worked out good for everyone, Me, Luke, Emily, even Amelia. And waltz I did, except he wasn't there.
Anonymous 10/17/07(Wed)01:53:34 No.43036949

Back to the pondering board it was. Left with no other ideas, we checked every hotel, motel, and place of temporary lodging we could find. Nothing. And then my sister finally had an idea. "How about that old apartment you guys used to have?" So we went to our old apartment building. I went to talk to my landlord, and he was actually happy to see me (I may have said it before, or maybe not, but Luke and I were pretty good friends with the landlord, he's actually pretty friendly to everyone). He's also pretty Jewish, like almost stereotypically Jewish. Still a cool guy though. "Jake, you're back, I missed you. You never came to visit me!" He gave me one of his handshakes where he tries to shake your arm off. "You know I thought I'd see you back since Luke just moved in." Bingo. So, for once, my sister had a good idea. "You know he had a young lady with him, looked to be a bit too young but hey as long as they pay their rent I'm not gonna bother them about their business right?" Bingo again. I asked him where the room was, saying I wanted to pay Luke a little "visit".
Anonymous 10/17/07(Wed)01:53:53 No.43036968

I went right up to the room (which was a different one than our old apartment). I knocked on the door, and Luke opened it up slightly before he saw that it was me with my older sister behind. He tried to close the door on us, but me and my sister forced it open (and Luke is a wide load to push). When we were in, Luke got that look on his face, I half-expected him to hand me a lamp and say "Get it over with". I told him to calm down, that I was just here to get my sister back, not to kick his ass. "Jake, this is trespassing, get out of here or I'll call the police." And at this, we both started laughing. This guy who coerced a 13 year old girl to run away from her parents to live with him is threatening to call the cops on me. However, I was reminded of the last incident involving Luke and the cops, and they didn't exactly come through that time. I went to go find my sister, and I found her on a bed in her underwear. A box of condoms on the side of the bed. And at that point I wondered if my sisters truly hated me. So the little angel on my shoulder darted my eyes away, but the little Anonymous on my other shoulder darted them back, but then I realized I had more important things to worry about. She covered herself, and I told her that we had come to get her. Suddenly Luke appears, and offers this challenge: "She's not going anywhere Jake, I'll fight you if that's what it takes." Now we were both about to laugh again, but at the same time I felt something. Like Luke was genuinely concerned about my sister, and at that point I started having a bit of a soft spot for the whole relationship, a small one. So I made a promise (one I wish I hadn't). "Emily, if you come back with me now I promise I'll help you see Luke again, but you can't live with him." I thought I was being nice, right? Luke decided to call the police anyway.
Anonymous 10/17/07(Wed)01:54:11 No.43036989

They arrived, and Luke gained a quick lead by saying that we were trespassing in his apartment. At this point my landlord had also arrived to see "What's all the bupkus about?". Once the police heard our side of the story though, and saw the box of condoms (my sister had gotten dressed by this point, so we couldn't use that) they decided that my sister had to go back, and entrusted me to deliver her. Luke was left at his apartment (they STILL wouldn't take him in, do I have to get a video of his 2 incher in her mouth?), and me and mis hermanas dos departed. I went back to my parents' house, and they were PISSED. I sat down on the edge of the couch as my sister in the middle sat there as my parents yelled in her face, little bits of spit flying at us, my older sister in the corner with her arms crossed looking disapprovingly. Everytime I tried to talk, I was quickly interrupted by "Shutup!". And then my mother turned to me. "AND I BLAME YOU!" Wait, me? What did I do!? "He's your friend!" Eventually though, I managed to calm them down, my sister went and escaped from the battle, and it was up to me. I smooth talked, and I managed to convince them to just drop it. "Oh at least she's back just let it be everything's okay blah blah..." So I somewhat saved my sister's ass, and Luke's ass, and my own very fine ass, but they're still pissed at her. I imagine they won't let her leave the house until she's 18. Fucked up one time too many, and this was pretty big.
Anonymous 10/17/07(Wed)01:54:28 No.43037018

Since it was already late, I decided to stay at my parent's place. As I was about to go to sleep, my sister came in. She settled down on top of me. "Get offa me." "You used to like this when I was younger." "Yeah but that was when you were young and cute." "Oh come on Jake, you're not really mad at me are you?" WHAT DO YOU MEAN I'M NOT FUCKING MAD AT YOU OF COURSE I'M... but actually, I wasn't that mad. No... don't fall for it Jake... she's trying to pretend to be cute... but the condoms... the Luke... soggy pancake... but I wasn't mad. Damnit. "Fine, I'm not that mad." So we talked for a bit more about Luke. Somehow, it's slightly possible that he's beneficial to her, maybe. And I did make a promise I'd help them see each other, which I have to keep. Somehow... I departed that morning, said goodbye to the family, and my older sister drove me back to Melinda's. Melinda was clearly depressed, Luke hadn't come home, it appears that he intended to live permanently in that apartment. And I thought to myself, "I STAY WITH SARAH, I FOUND MY SISTER, I SAVED HER AND LUKE, I'M NOT DOING ANY MORE GOOD DEEDS FOR A WEEK!" But I ended up consoling Melinda, and with that I did my last good deed.
Anonymous 10/17/07(Wed)01:54:46 No.43037040

But then I realized I had to go visit Erika, who wasn't going to be happy I didn't visit yesterday. Surprisingly though, she wasn't mad about it at all. She kept on discussing the new kid still, his name being Rodger. So it seemed to me that Erika had her first little crush. The kid was actually 8, younger than her. I asked about it a bit more, and she said that she sort of liked him. In actuality though, I didn't like it. I know they're only 9, but first it's dating, and then it's kissing, and then it's... (at this point images of my sister laying on that bed naked flashed through my mind). Okay, maybe that's being a bit too touchy about a little infatuation. And then she told me, "But I already like being your girlfriend!" (she's not really super serious, just joking). "Well how about I just stick to being your dad?" "Okay, but you're still my favorite guy." THAT'S RIGHT RODGER, DON'T MESS WITH BEST. 'Sokay though, I don't have to start beating up the boys she brings home until she hits puberty. Actually I saw Rodger, he was a pretty small pale kid. I'm sure Erika just enjoys having somebody to talk to where she is, which is good of course. So I'm back here at Melinda's, and since I left from the home nothing of note has happened, all has returned to normalcy. Hopefully my little sister will stay out of trouble, and my big sister will get in a car crash (okay I'm kidding about that...maybe).
Thread 46
10/19/07(Fri)01:15:53 No.43249206

Good evening /b/, blindmuteloli guy here with another date rape... er update. Yesterday, I visited Erika. I could tell something was wrong immediately, didn't want to ask until she was going to tell me though. We talked a bit, and I brought up her friend Rodger. That's when the conversation turned sour. So it seemed something was wrong with her new friendship. As it turns out, her friend Rodger isn't as friendly as she once thought. As the story she told me goes, she was trying to talk to him as usual, but he was ignoring her writing. Eventually she tapped him on the shoulder, and he lashed out at her. "Why don't you leave me the fuck alone?". Erika was puzzled by this, asked him what meant and his response was: "Why would I want to be friends with some dumb blind bitch?" (young kids curse like sailors these days), and then proceeded to push her down at which point the staff intervened. So yeah, he turned on her, and she was pretty depressed over it, tearing up a bit (I thought at that point that she probably had friends before her parents died that she hasn't seen in a long time). I gave her a hug and reminded her that I was still her friend. She was cheered up a bit by that, and I told me that I was her best friend.
10/19/07(Fri)01:16:29 No.43249275

But then she asked me, "Why don't people like me?". "People do you like you, I like you, Sharon likes you, Melinda likes you." "Nobody here likes me." "Sometimes people don't like other people they don't understand. Really, the kids here have nothing except for their little group they've made. And for there to be a group, there always has to be somebody not in it." "But you don't need to be part of their group or any other, it's really not important." She seemed pacified at that, and gave me a kiss on the cheek. "I never liked Rodger better than you." And I replied, "I'm relieved." Before long though, I had to leave. I got a little inside information from Sharon later that evening, who called me. She told me that my adoption was actually looking very good. "People have been watching you, a lot, and they like what they see." That part made me a bit paranoid, but if they're liking what they see I guess it's okay. As far as my sister and Luke goes, I haven't spoken to either one. Maybe if I ignore it it'll go away...
Thread 47
Anonymous 10/25/07(Thu)00:48:18 No.43425305

Hullo internetters, blindmuteloli guy back again for another update. So on Sunday (as in today) I was sprucing up to go once again to visit Erika, when I received a call. It was an extremely urgent matter, so I had to attend to it immediately. This was indeed a highly urgent matter, one that I couldn't delay on acting upon. So I dropped what I was doing and rushed out of the house. After getting it out of the way, I returned home. My whole day had been completely altered from what I thought it would be. I opened the door, walked on into Melinda's house. And I was being followed. By the pitter patter of little feet. Of a girl, around 9... okay I'll stop beating off around the bush, Erika is back with me. Once again, only on a "trial" basis, but I think my chances this time are much better. Erika and I were extremely elated at this fact, her especially. She was prancing about Melinda's house, assuredly pleased to be somwhere else than the home. We spent the whole evening together celebrating, and she was in the best mood I've seen her in a long while. She couldn't stop flashing her smile at me. So yeah, that's really all that happened, and of course it's wonderful. This time, it feels even better, it feels like I really earned it. She fell asleep on top of me on the couch, and she's still there sleeping. Now of course that old saying says don't count your chickens in a basket before the cows come home... or some shit, but what I mean by that it's not totally set in stone that she's mine yet. However, it's looking good. With any luck this will be the time. Either way, I'm going to take off work tomorrow to just spend the day with her.
Anonymous 10/25/07(Thu)00:56:19 No.43426006

Okay now /b/, timewarp (and no we're not doing the time warp, go throw toast at somebody else you faggots) to a few days later. I only posted the last 3 paragraphs to pastebin while 4chan was down, so everything beyond this sentence is happening a bit later. I did stay home with Erika that day, and we had a great time (especially the missing work part). During the day, we talked a bit about her education. I told her that perhaps when the whole adoption thing gets sorted out, she should start going to a public school. She expressed an aversion to the idea, leading me to believe she had some sort of problems with it before. "You don't want to end up a NEET though, do you?" She didn't understand the term. Well if she ever does become a hikikomori she can live in my house. That does bring up how she's going to be educated though. Despite not going to a real school (besides some small education received where she was), she doesn't seem to be much farther behind anyone else of her age range. I've been trying to be helpful in that regard throughout our daily routine, correcting her misspellings where applicable. Guess I've got time to work that out though. As for the next day, I couldn't skip work. I tried calling everyone I knew to watch Erika. She was excited at the prospect of going to Jim's, but he was out. So I was left with only one person: Megan. Okay, it's not really that dreadful as to require an ominous colon. She came over, she babysat, I came back, Erika wasn't dead. She kept on acting like she was waiting for me to ask her about how her life was going. Ask her if she had a new boyfriend, and then if she did I would sting with envy and it would ruin my day. Instead, I barely acknowledged her, paid her, and she left. Jim has been home since, so he's been babysitting for me, and happy to do it. That's about it that's been happening. On another note though, Erika and I have already been shopping from Halloween. But I'll keep thata secret until said day, where I shall have a thread hopefully to amuse. It's been a while since I've celebrated halloween, with the bloody costumes, spending tons of monies to scare little children. And since I now have a child of my own, what's to stop me?


Thread 48
11/01/07(Thu)02:04:40 No.44092933

Hullo and happy begging day /b/. I haven't made a thread in a bit, but I haven't forgot about you all. So, however, incidentally, and coincidentally (take that grammarians!) today is Halloween. Despite the will of the evil beurocrates (what do the leaders of a government based upon rule by wooden boxes want with me?), Halloween was quite fun for both Erika and myself. We were both outfitted in costumes. Mine was nothing in particular, just a person intended to be incredibly bloody and ugly looking. I had some fake wounds, tattered clothes, plenty of blood. It turned out rather nicely though. Erika's costume was a bit different. It was intended to be a Sadako-like creepy loli. She had the long white dress thing, I painted her showing skin gray (and a guy at Halloween store gave me a tip on how to make it look more dead), and then she had the wig with the long black hair typical of Sadako. She looked rather creepy, especially the skin. Sadoko and I departed to trick or treat (although I had some other things on my mind). Of course I couldn't leave Melinda's house devoid of candy, what of the poor children that wish to beg from her doorstep? She was out, having no Halloween spirit. I didn't have any candy, so I had to settle for the next best thing. I put out a sign that says "Please Take One", taped it to my door, and then put a bowl beneath it. This bowl was filled with empty candy packages, and a napkin. And at the bottom, another sheet of paper. "This house is filled with Worshippers of the Holy Lord Satan, Go Away. Happy Halloween :-)" Jolly good! We all know those real "Please Take One" bowls never work.
11/01/07(Thu)02:05:24 No.44092984

After that business was taken care of, Erika and I actually did depart. She went around trick-or-treating (she's not actually super fond of candy though). Another order of the night though was engaging in the true spirit of halloween: trying to scare people. In my arsenal, I had two things to accomplish this end. One was a metal bat, and one was a fake plastic knife. The bat being for people that wouldn't be scared by something obviously plastic. Of course I wasn't going to smite the innocent. Oh no, on this Halloween day the sinners are the ones who shall pay. The judgement of those who have done misdeeds began at a poor little naive house. They had the Halloween spirit flowing through them, inflatable decorations in their yard, jack-o-lanterns lovingly crafted, and a bowl full of candy. But they left it in the hands of not so commanding sign. And thus, the stake out began. Erika and I hid in the bushes, and waited for the first person to walk up. Somebody did, but in fact they only took one. But the next group was most assured to be evil. A group of rowdy boys, perhaps slightly older than Erika. They walked up... closer... closer... and they did it. They weren't even going to leave the bowl, one of them picked up the whole thing and left. As they walked past the bushes where I was hiding, now was the time to strike. I leapt from the bushes, with the fake knife in hand, and screamed at them. They jumped back slightly, but were relieved when they saw it was merely plastic. Time for Plan B it would seem. I pulled out the bat from behind my back, and begin chasing after them, and that's when they began running. "I'M GONNA SLAUGHTER YOU IT SAYS ONLY TAKE ONE!"
11/01/07(Thu)02:06:20 No.44093067

The boy who was holding the bowl dropped it rather quickly, but I continued to chase after them for a bit anyway. People around us were staring at me, perhaps a bit disturbed at the 20 year old trick-or-treating or perhaps that he was chasing kids with a bat. All for the Halloween spirit though, right? Erika, who heard the whole thing, was behind the bushes laughing (and if there's any confusion, laughing means not really the audible noise we generally consider laughing, but you can see on her face that it's laughing). We set the bowl back up as she was still snickering a bit, and I was struck with divine inspiration. I had Erika put some of the fake blood on her, and then put some of it on my bat, and had her lay face down in the bushes. The next group that came along to test the divine will of the sign was a slightly older group, I'm guessing 11-12. They would be harder to scare, which is what I had anticipated. They walked up, tipped the bowl over to pour it all in their bags, and began to walk off. That's of course when I made my entrance. I jumped out with the bat, and they were surprised, but the scare wore off. And one of the bratty little kids had to say "You're not funny." Oh? And that's when I tried to put on my best psycho face and voice. "You think I'm kidding?" I pulled back the bush to reveal Erika's "corpse". A slight reaction. "Yeah, like we're supposed to believe that." Hmmm... "You don't? But you know Halloween is the best time for serial killers to operate, nobody suspects them." They were getting a bit creeped out (it doesn't sound as menacing in text, but when called upon I can be quite an actor). Now to finish them. I got closer to their faces and said, "Have you ever checked the sex offenders' registry in Ohio?" and gave a classic pedosmile. I don't know if they knew what that was yet (but kids do know a lot of things these days), but it was a success. They didn't run, they merely walked back to the bowl, put the candy back, and walked off as I stood there smiling. Once they were gone, Erika started laughing again. I think we both agreed this was more fun than trick-or-treating. But I knew that it would be better to wait until day turned to night to strike again.
11/01/07(Thu)02:07:06 No.44093109

We continued going to houses, gathering candy. This in itself creeped people out a bit. Erika would ring the doorbell, knock or whatever, and then stand there holding a bag out. Obviously she couldn't talk (of course they didn't know that), so she just seemed to be standing there rather rudely, or somewhat creepily. Sometimes I'd tell them that she couldn't talk, sometimes I wouldn't and just stand there in the background until they gave her the candy (or in one case just shut the door). In particular one nice old lady looked very concerned, I could see it in the way she was looking at Erika. She opened the door, started off cheery, and when she got no response she started looking very intently at Erika. And then she said "Is she okay?". I felt a bit bad for an old lady who clearly was expecting nothing more complex than little kids covered in their bedsheets, but I didn't say anything. There was more silence, and then she just gave Erika a piece of candy and closed the door. I think it might be the eyes that throw some people off. You would think they would have seen a blind person before, but maybe not.
11/01/07(Thu)02:07:56 No.44093167

By the time it turned dark, Erika had amassed a large bag of candy by now. A group of older kids approached the two of us. They had to be at least in high school. They didn't have any costumes on, so I imagine they were just out begging for candy (sure we were too, but at least we gave people entertainment). As luck would have it though, they offered to buy Erika's bag of candy. As I said, she's not too fond of candy, so she was more than happy to cut a deal with them. She asked for 25 dollars originally (start high is what I always say), they said 10, she said 20, they said 15, she said 20, and they ended up paying 20 dollars. It's all a matter of supply and demand. She had the supply, they had the demand, everybody else probably sent them away. Now that's what I call smart economics. She made 20 dollars in a matter of hours (okay the costumes probably cost more than 20, but it's about the spirit not the cash).
11/01/07(Thu)02:08:54 No.44093239

We decided to call it a day for now and head home. But there would be one more occurence. I got approached by Mr. Tough Guy. We've all seen Mr. Tough Guy. Mr. Tough Guy is a bit overweight, balding, has a wife who owns him, a couple of little kids, owns a motorcycle to try and reclaim his youth that's long gone, that's Mr. Tough Guy. And lawd forbid you mess with Mr. Tough Guy's Halloween. His Halloween is filled with his little kids walking around with poorly made costumes, getting candy and putting them into little plastic pumpkin containers, and the most scary thing being a paper bag on a string. Oh yeah? Well fuck your Halloween. "Hey buddy, were you the guy chasing those two kids with a bat earlier? You're a real jerk you know that!" Mr. Tough Guy comes closer. "Don't you have anything to say, huh? Aren't you a little old to be trick-or-treating?" And he gave me a slight push. Erika didn't do anything, not because she was scared I imagine but because she knew I already had the situation taken care of, which I did. I could have knocked his head off with the bat, but I had something better in mind. The last trick in my bag of tricks, something I had been wanting to use all night but hadn't been given the chance to. I bent over and started making noises like his push ruptured my heart or something or I was having a stroke. While I was hunched over, I secretly put a chewable blood capsule in my mouth. I'm sure you've seen them. You bite down on them, fake blood comes out. When I got it in, I bit down and I tilted my head up so he could see the blood coming out. Since it was a different shade of red than all the other blood on my costume, he thought it was real. "Are you okay?" I continued coughing (and coughed out a bit of fake blood on his pantleg) and making noises, slowly collapsing on the sidewalk. Mr. Tough Guy was believing my facade, starting to think his little push had killed me. Erika I'm sure was trying not to laugh at him. Once MTG had made enough ruckus to get a few people around me, I then got up, and grabbed Erika's hand. "Erika, I just saw Satan, he told me it's time for us to come with him. Let's go." And then we slowly walked away. All of the other people (and by people I really meant curious teens who probably weren't as gullible and were probably coming over just to poke what might be a real dead guy) dispersed, but Mr. Tough Guy looked freaked out. It's a shame he didn't have his kid with him.
11/01/07(Thu)02:09:36 No.44093291

That's how Halloween went. In other news, Sharon is marrying Mark. And the wedding is this weekend. I know that seems like it came out of nowhere, because it did. She had apparently been planning it for a while, but hadn't told me because in her words, "I didn't want to invite you." Yes, sometimes she can be so blunt. But luckily she finally decided to invite us little people, and wanted Erika to serve as the flower girl. It's going to be a small wedding at house a friend of hers has. I don't really want to attend (but I suppose it would be rude not to). If they ever have an official ceremony for their inevitable divorce however, I'd be happy to be there. And finally, yes, I do like Shedinja very much.
Thread 49
11/05/07(Mon)02:49:39 No.44480993

Good evening fellows, blindmuteloli guy here again. Sharon's wedding was today, and it was just as crappy as expected. A few days before, I had to of course go shopping for a fancy dress for Erika. Sharon didn't give me any info on what the other people would be wearing, so I just tried to pick what seemed right for a wedding, white. As expected, everything was Jew-stronomically expensive, but I bought something that looked nice on her. And on the plus side it was quite cute and she'll have something to wear for future formal engagements. Erika didn't like shopping for it anymore than I did though, so we just tried to get it done quickly. And then of course I needed some clothes, but I imagine you all aren't as interested about that. Time passed since, and the day of the wedding came. The priest was a large black man, but talked like a stereotypically gay male. It was pretty creepy. He was talking to me a bit, and it felt as if he was undressing me with his eyes. Wanting to slowly ride his dark black stallion into my horizon, if you catch my drift. Erika was separated from me when we arrived to prepare her for her duties, so I took a seat next to an elderly looking lady. Turns out it was Sharon's mother. We chatted a bit, and apparently she doesn't have a very high opinion of Mark. "I think he's a real jackass." Well, I agree with her there. Before long, the ceremony started. Nothing much to say about it. Erika did her thing looking wonderful (the only thing I cared to see), and Black Rico said all of the usual priesty stuff. At the "speak now or forever hold your peace" however, things got much more interesting. No, I'm lying, nothing interesting happened. They both read some vows too, and Mark showed that he has the linguistic skills of a 5 year old. Ceremony finished, and the reception began.
11/05/07(Mon)02:51:49 No.44481163

I ate as much of the free food as I could fit down my throat, and made sure Erika robbed them of the same. After that her and I danced for a bit (though I'm not good at it) but eventually she abandoned me to go play with some of Sharon's younger relatives. Eventually I was approached by another dance partner: Sharon's mom. Sharon's dad has been dead for a bit, so she had nobody to dance with either. She was surprisingly good too, I couldn't keep up with her. She had that elderly chicken skin underarm flab effect, which was somewhat hypnotic as it flowed and danced around as she did. I was also spotted by Mark, who said hello to me and my "blind midget". Erika was quite offended at the term, telling me that she'd show him blind midget by thrusting 5 toes into his balls. I also got to meet Mark's mom, who was a very scary old lady in a wheelchair who seemed mildly crazy. I said hello and she started yelling at me about how she doesn't want me marrying her daughter (if she has one who knows). His dad was a jovial and corpulent man who seemed to be hitting on some of the younger females in attendance. Of course I would too if my wife was crazy. Soon enough, Erika and I left. Not much happened, it was pretty uneventful as I said.
11/05/07(Mon)02:53:54 No.44481307

Except that is when we got home. Apparently Erika learned a new term from one of Sharon's young rambunctious male relatives. "Beating your meat", what it means and if I've ever done it. There's a sad truth to that question, but instead I merely gave her the knowledge that it was an odd cooking technique from France.
Thread 50
11/09/07(Fri)01:26:50 No.44855088

Greetings again to /b/, it's the blindmute loli chap again with another update. Erika recently went to her first wedding. And speaking of that, I recently heard from a source that her and Mark are having marital issues already. They may be on the fast track to a very speedy divorce. That's not the topic today though. For recently Erika also went to her first funeral. Who died? Well I'll get to that. Shortly after the wedding, Erika and I were lazing about the house, when I heard the phone ringing. Answering it swiftly, it was none other than the bellow of a large bull, the American Luke. He informed me that my former landlord, his current landlord, is dead. I was slightly shocked at the news. I mean he certainly wasn't a young man, but it's funny how he died just after I talked to him again. According to Luke, he had a heart attack and molested the cactus. And that's how he came to call me to ask if I wanted to go to the funeral. As part of his requests upon his death he wrote, he said he'd invite any former or current tenants to his funeral. I thought the idea was a bit off, even if we were technically invited. Luke I imagine did too, as he requested me to go with to perhaps make him feel less awkward (don't think there's still no bad blood between us). As for losing him, it was more like having one of your favorite coffee mugs break. A mixture of, "Wow I really miss my coffee mug." and "Eh, it was just a coffee mug." But he was a nice guy, so why not? I told Luke I'd go, and asked Erika if she wanted to come with. Suddenly I noticed some bad feelings in the room. It took a while before I realized the subject of a funeral might strike some bad feelings for her. It may have been erroneous to state that it would be her first funeral too, but I didn't inqure any further upon the subject. I tried cheering her up though. "There'll be lots of his tenants there I'm sure, it'll be like a big party." She agreed to go with me.
11/09/07(Fri)01:27:35 No.44855138

The day of the funeral came, and we got all primmed up. Erika was wearing white, since it's the only truly formal thing she had. We arrived... and there was almost nobody. Luke was already there, and besides him there were only 3 people. Two older looking females, and an older looking male. Erika wanted to know if they were wearing the "funny hats" (yarmulkes that is). "How do you know if they're funny?", seeing as she can't see them. She only responded cryptically, "I know these things."
11/09/07(Fri)01:28:22 No.44855198

It was far from a big party. I tried to make conversation though, as it seems that a service hadn't been started yet. I turned to the old woman next to me, "Hi! How do you know him?" She gave a sour look and said "I'm his ex-wife." Suddenly the little question mark appeared above my head. "He always told people his only wife died." "That bastard wishes I was dead but I made sure to stay alive so I could dance on his goddamn grave." Part of me thought this woman was very coarse in the presence of a young child, and part of me hoped that when I was that old I'd be just as mean. Going down to talk to the next person, "How do you know him?" "I'm his sister." Oh, well that's nice. At least one of his real family is coming to pay him respect. "I'm just here to see if he left me anything." Well, there goes that... There was still one more person though. "I'm a friend of his, we go way back." said the man. Okay then, one and only one person has come for good wholesome reasons. "I was hoping I could find one of his relatives here to pay back some of the money he owes me." I'm starting to feel like this man really was as important as a coffee mug to these people. "He always says 'Oh I'll pay you back' but it never happened! Old man was so cheap he probably killed himself just to avoid paying me back!" The landlord's ex-wife quickly grew impatient though. "Let's get this goddamn show on the road!" Erika was laughing at her, and I was trying to stifle my chuckling. Luke seemed rather bored, and then I noticed it. It was that gleam in his eyes. It sparkled, his gaze focused on one thing: the food. His lips moistening, wishing this funeral business would hasten, that he might sink his teeth into the comestibles teasing him like a filthy harlot.
11/09/07(Fri)01:29:54 No.44855329

The clergyman started the service, delivering the words about delivering him to God and what not. He asked if anybody wanted to speak a few words for the departed, and there wasn't really much selection. His sister stepped up to the plate. "He was my brother. When we were kids, we always fought. As soon as he became an adult, he moved out. He made no attempt at contacting me or our parents. We found him a few times, but he rarely had more than two words to say to us. Now he's dead." She walked back to her seat somberly. And as bad as it was, I felt it wasn't the worst to come. I knew who would want her turn next. "I could tell you a million stories about this asshole..." and at that the clergyman intervened. "Why don't we just all form a line and pay private respects to the body?" It was unfortunate too, because I wanted to hear the million stories. We all formed a line, and took turns looking at the open casket (which I thought was forbidden by Jewish custom). When his ex-wife passed by him, she made a noise like she was gathering up a huge ball of mucus to spit on his face. I went "o lawd", but she ended up walking away without doing it. "If I still had my period I wouldn't give you my blood..." When Erika went up to him, she obviously couldn't see him, so she poked him. Right in the eyeball, as she obviously didn't have the aim to discriminate between areas of his face.
11/09/07(Fri)01:32:16 No.44855486

There was sort of a "squoosh" noise, and I almost apologized for her conduct, but then I realized the few attendees could care less. When I got up to see him, I was almost tempted to test that theory about dead men still having erections. Almost. His sister walked by without incident, but his friend started getting slightly emotional. "I could single-handedly blame you for the stereotype about Jews being cheapskates, but you were a pretty good guy." Luke used the friction of his thighs rubbing together to propel him as fast as he could past the body, to get to the food. And since all was pretty much done (except for the burying, which we didn't get to witness) we went on to that point. Erika and I didn't really eat anything, since we both felt a little bit weird being there in the first place. I did ask his ex-wife though if there wasn't some Jewish customs that were supposed to be being followed. She answered me, "As far as I'm concerned throw some dirt on his ass and bring out the cocktails."
11/09/07(Fri)01:32:53 No.44855524

Luke, as I expected, went to the food like a raving animal. Luke has always been fleshy, and it's not hard to see why. "Good thing I didn't shell out more for this thing or lardass would eat up all my pension money!" Luke was apparently too busy gorging himself to care. I asked her why she payed for it in the first place. "If I meet that son of a bitch in hell one day I don't want him to say I never did anything for him." As for her opinion on Erika: "She'd be cute if she was white." I always find racism in old people so endearing for whatever reason. Erika didn't find it so funny though. She responded, "Oh yeah well you're a hag!" The old woman didn't take it well. The clergyman announced that anyone who wanted to see the burial should come soon, but since I felt that Erika was about to throwdown with this old woman I figured it was time for us to go. As we left, Luke continued to inhale things, the old woman was throwing expletives, and the friend was starting to break down into tears. His sister looked just as bored and indifferent as she did from the start. As we drove home, I imagined that old woman had went to the burial site. She walked over to his tombstone with a feeling of triumph. Her old bones began moving. They began jitterbugging. She was jitterbugging all over his grave. How satisfying it must have been.
Thread 51

15 POSTS
11/18/07(Sun)00:20:00 No.45750161

Hello /b/, blindmuteloli guy here again. A lot has happened recently, so brace yourself for impact and for a long read. It was a normal day around the house, in the evening. Melinda reminded me that I needed to stay home from work tomorrow, since I was going to be meeting one of her relatives. Her niece, Angela, was coming to stay with her for a week or so, while her sister went on vacation with her husband. My job was to be there while Melinda was at work to watch over her and Erika. I didn't object at all to the duty, as it gives me an excuse to miss work. And, as Melinda rhetorically asked me, "Who's the bread winner in this family?". It was almost cute how she said "family", and the 3 of us had become somewhat of that. Angela was about Erika's age too, so I was hoping they'd take a liking to each other. And that she wouldn't be a brat, or crazy like her aunt. She drilled it into me though that I had to be there, and I remembered.
11/18/07(Sun)00:20:57 No.45750246

That day, Jim had told me that Erika had been feeling a bit sick while she had been staying at his place, and she was. She had pain in her abdomen, a fever, and didn't feel like eating. I tried to comfort her, and gave her a bit of medicine, but she wasn't helped much. We both went to sleep, and I thought maybe she'd feel better in the morning. She woke up, and got out of bed and was reeling in abdominal pain. She was just hunched over holding her stomach on the ground. I began thinking it was more serious than I originally though. Since I had a day off, we drove to the doctor's office. In the waiting room, Erika was about to fall out of her chair clutching her stomach, and I was getting more worried. A woman at the desk asked me if I'd like to see the doctor right away, sensing it was kind of an emergency, and I said yes so into the examination room we went.
11/18/07(Sun)00:25:37 No.45750642

The doctor, who spoke in a very monotone voice, said "What's the problem?" It's a bit obvious, isn't it!? He had Erika lift up her shirt, and put pressure on her stomach in various points to see where the pain is coming from. I told him about how she's been feeling sick recently, and he came to his conclusion rather quickly. "Based on the symptoms you've given me, I would say that she might have appendicitis, it's rather common." At that point, I breathed a sigh of a relief. Not a big deal, they just take the thing out, and she's all better. "When did these symptoms start?" "Yesterday in the morning-afternoonish about." "Well, from that information, it's possible that rupture could occur soon." "What's that?" "It's when the appendix bursts." "Oh, is that bad?" "Well, generally it leads to peritonitis and eventually death." WHAT!? Erika did the same thing, putting a look on her face of "What the fuck did you just say?".
11/18/07(Sun)00:26:19 No.45750702

He wrote down an address. "What I want you to do is drive her to this hospital, go there and have them test her for it and then have them perform an appendectomy if she has it." We rushed out of there, and I was hoping that Erika wasn't going to freak out on me. But she remained level headed, and we got into the car. I'm speeding to the address, and I wasn't entirely sure where it was, when suddenly I hear the sirens of a cop. Now I'm a good driver generally. In fact, I've never been ticketed. And, on this day, it so happened that the gods abhored me. And you can imagine how much of a terrible father I felt like. I had let these symptoms get worse, I should've brought her to the doctor's office sooner. I considered for a moment stepping on the gas and getting into a car chase, but I didn't want to see my car on the news. I pulled over, and Mr. Cop sure took his time getting over to me. "You were going pretty fast, you in a hurry?"
11/18/07(Sun)00:26:55 No.45750755

I proceeded to explain the situation to him, and luckily he was sympathetic to it. "I know where that is sir, would you like me to help you out?" Maybe the gods didn't abhor me after all. I followed him to the hospital, and by that time Erika had gotten worse. We went in, approached a desk, and a woman asked us our problem. "We're pretty sure she has appendicitis." "Okay, one second." "Okay but we're sort of having an emergency..." "You and everybody else," she said with a sigh. I'm thinking "ADHKASKDH MINE IS MORE IMPORTANT". Eventually she reappeared, and Erika was brought into a testing room. They did an ultrasound, and were able to locate the appendix and confirm that it was appendicitis. They whisked her away into an operating room to take the appendix out, and the doctor told me that it was good we arrived when we did. Once she was in the operating room, the police officer departed, and I thanked him for all of his help. And I asked him, "Is this going to go on my record?". He looked at me like I was a crazy man, but I did sort of value my flawless traffic record (even if my police record in other areas was lacking). "I'll... see what I can do."
11/18/07(Sun)00:29:11 No.45750953

The woman at the desk gave me some forms to fill out, and I realized that this was going to be troublesome, seeing as since Erika's not really mine yet, her health insurance situation is complicated. And then I looked up at the clock and thought "oh shit." Angela had arrived about an hour ago, and was probably angrily waiting on Melinda's doorstep. I didn't want to leave, but I figured it would be okay, and that I'd be back before they're finished operating on her. I hurried out, and the women told me "Sir you didn't finish those forms..." "I'll be back!" I sped again to Melinda's house (luckily not meeting a cop). There I found her, as I thought. An angry looking black haired caucasian loli ready to bite my head off. "Are you Jake?" "Uuuh yeah," I said as I opened the door. "You sure took your sweet time to arrive here didn't you?" "Look, Angela, there's sort of an emergency going on so can you put your stuff in the house and get in the car?" "No!" Now I'm getting agitated, "WHY NOT?" And now she's starting to pull the weepy little child routine.
11/18/07(Sun)00:29:51 No.45751007

At first, I thought "I'm not falling for that!" and then she said in an embarrassed voice, "I sort of... peed my pants." I certainly wasn't expecting this. "What? You're like 8, you can't hold it?" I looked, and she had definitely just let it out right on the doorstep. Hasn't she ever heard of a bush? "Well I had to go the whole trip and you left me out here for a whole 5 hours and it's cold!", with little whimpers sprinkled throughout. Okay, I fell for it. "Well it's nothing to be embarrassed about... just go change and come back here, and please do it quickly." While she was doing that, I walked inside and checked the phone messages to see if Melinda had called. She did call twice, but the next message was the concerning one. It started off with a bunch of legal, formal gafblhtzl, and then "I represent Mr..." and what was after that mister was Erika's last name. "If you could please call me back, my number is..." At first I immediately thought "her father?", but then I settled it in my mind. It could be an uncle, grandfather, cousin, any number of relatives. I wonder what they wanted though. As I stood there spacing out, Angela tugged on my shirt. "You said it was important, are you ready to go yet?"
11/18/07(Sun)00:30:22 No.45751062

We left again for the hospital. I explained the situation to Angela, and she apologized for being a bit a attitudinal. "It's okay." Phew, at least she wasn't a total brat. We arrived back at the hospital, and the woman said to me, "Sir do you just go looking for little girls? What's wrong wit thissun?" "Nothing, she's just a niece of a friend of mine." And she gave me an "mmmhmmm". The operation wasn't finished yet, so we loitered around the waiting room. Angela could tell I was worrying, but she didn't know what I was really worried about. The call. What did it mean? Could it be her father? If it's a relative, do they want custody? If they do, do they get it automatically above me? Can they just come in and erase everything I've did? I debated telling Erika about it, but I decided I'd hold off a bit since she's already going through enough it seems. Angela tried to take my mind off of it by playing hangman and tic-tac-toe with me with a little pad of paper she had in her bag, but it wasn't working. Then she pulled something else out of her bag. "Wanna play my DS?" Looking at the games she brought there was Elite Beat Agents, Nintendogs, and Mario kart. At least she had good taste. I owned the game EBA too, I hadn't played it in a while, but I thought why not? Worrying doesn't help anything, and maybe I'd find some mystic message in EBA. I started playing songs.
11/18/07(Sun)00:31:04 No.45751127

"You can't ignore, and say 'It makes no difference to me.'" No. You think you're pretty clever, don't you EBA? "Do you belieeeeeeeeeve in life after love?" No. "You make me wanna, you make me wanna SCREAM." What the fuck, is this game messing with me!? "He was a sk8r boi, she said you l8r boi." Definitely no. "Young man, there's no need to feel down, I said young man, get yourself off the ground." Okay, getting warmer... "We are living in a material world, and I am a material girl!" Okay, getting colder...
11/18/07(Sun)00:32:58 No.45751288

And then, the sappiest EBA song. "You're the meaning in my life, you're the inspiration, you give meaning to my life, you're the inspiration... wanna have you near me..." Even if amputee-chan hated the song, I went ";_; Erika is the meaning in my life". Then I looked down, and I had failed the song. Even still, I had good "aaaw" feelings running through me. Angela was bored though, so she took back her DS. I rode my good feelings until the operation was finished, when the operation completed. The doctor informed me that it was successfully removed, that no peritonitis (keep in mind I might be spelling these terms wrong, I'm a restaurant worker not a doctor) has developed, and the case turned out to be typical. Erika would be able to leave the hospital in a few days. Eventually I got to see her, but she fell back asleep before I really got to say anything.
11/18/07(Sun)00:34:31 No.45751441

I was prepared to stay the night, but Angela wanted to leave so I obliged. I drove her back to Melinda's, who greeted me holding up Angela's urine stained panties. "What are these?" "I'll let her explain...", and I left Angela and Melinda alone. Back to the hospital I went (I know it seems like I'm going back and forth sporadically), and I was greeted by a worker from CPS. They're pretty quick about some things. "Hi, are you Jake?" "Yes, that's me." "Hi Jake, I'm from Child Protective Services. I'd just like to have a few words with you about Erika, is that okay?" "Sure." Normally the sight of anything CPS makes me go "ah fuck, these assholes again", but I was actually in a good mood that everything had gone well with Erika, and was off guard. "So, what happened to Erika?" "She had appendicitis, they had to remove her appendix." "Oh, I see. When did it start?" "When she was over at my friend Jim's house." "Who's Jim?" "He's a friend and former neighbor of mine, he helps watch Erika when I'm at work." And then she gave me a "hmmm..." The little twinge appeared in my eye, and I recognized it. That wasn't just a "hmmm", that was THE "hmmm". The, "hmmm I'm gonna be a bitch and say hmmm and now you're uneasy." I put my game face on. "How are you adapting to being a father now Jake?" "Oh, it's wonderful. Erika is wonderful." "Can it be a bit stressful at times?" "Well, yeah, but nothing I can't deal with." "Being a father of a child with disabilities can be pretty hard, especially since you're single, can't it?" "Erika is a very well behaved and loveable kid, not difficult at all." "Do you ever get a bit angry when dealing with her?" I suspected what she was getting at. "Am I being accused of something?" "No, my job is just to make sure that there's not something more to the story." "Well, ma'am, you can ask anybody here and they'll tell you that it was appendicitis, and there's nothing more to the story, so I think you're job is done."
11/18/07(Sun)00:35:14 No.45751515

She refused to leave though. "Can I see Erika?" "She's asleep, but I guess." She asked a hospital worker, and they agreed to let her look in. She noticed a few marks on Erika's leg visible from the hospital outfit she was wearing. "What are those?" "Those are bruises left by the person your organization thought was better fit to be a father than I was." (Ryan) She gave me a small look like "well dayum", and in my mind I was getting a round of applause. "Well, I'll be going for now... but I might be back..." Pfft, thinking she's being ominous. I went into Erika's room she had been relocated too, and she was still sleeping. I sat there beside her, just watching her sleep. Randomly, an elderly black man walked into my room. He was a bit like Bill Cosby. "Well hey there!" He didn't have any uniform on, so it didn't look like he worked at the hospital. "Uh hi." "Is this your daughter?" "Uh yeah." "She didn't mention you were so young!" I began thinking that this was some crazy old dude with alzheimer's who had wandered into my room, and before long a bunch of people were going to rush in to inject something into his ass. "Uuuh... do you know her?"
11/18/07(Sun)00:35:48 No.45751556

As it turns out, he wasn't crazy. He related to me the story of how he found Erika walking on the street, and she seemed lost. He led her around, and eventually to the restaurant where I work, saying that her father owned it, and that's how she ended up seeing me. It was odd running into him in a hospital of all places, and I was inclined not to believe it. "What are you here for?" "My sister has cancer, I'm here to visit her." "Sorry to hear that." "Well, that's how life goes. I hope Atica gets better." He left. Yeah, he said Attica, not Erika (or it's just possible he has weird pronunciation, or when Erika told him her name in the first place her handwriting wasn't legible). I started pondering again whether or not he was just some crazy patient. I also thought about how everything would've played out if it had been him instead of me. Very weird.
11/18/07(Sun)00:36:43 No.45751624

The night came and went, and Erika finally woke up. I brought her stuff along, but I told her she didn't have to write if she didn't feel like it. She wanted to talk to me though. "You just can't get a break, can you Erika?" "You saved me though." "Well some of the people who did the operation told me the doctor might have been a bit overdramatic in saying you were about to die." Maybe he gets some sort of sadistic pleasure out of it. Then I told her about the odd visit from Mista Cosby. "Did that all happen?" "Yeah. I used him to get away from the place, but he was old and creepy so I told him to leave. He said there was nothing but a restaurant by us so I told him my dad owned it." From the combined testimony of her and him, apparently they had been doing an outside activity, Erika managed to slip out, almost walked into the street, was found by Bill, and then escorted to my restaurant. "African-american male kidnaps blindmute asian girl from orphanage. Little girl quoted: 'Hit the bricks, nigga.'" "Why was I better than him?" "You had food."
11/18/07(Sun)00:37:21 No.45751672

I agreed with her, he was slightly creepy. Then after a bit of silence, she got more serious. "What do you think happens when we die?" Not an easy question to answer, and but I gave the best one I could. "Well... nobody really knows." Well, hey it's true, isn't it? "If I had a funeral, I'd want it to be like that one we went to." "Even with the old hag?" "Yeah, she was funny." I put my arm around her and said, "Don't worry, you won't die any time soon." "Wherever I go when I die, I hope you're there." I gave her a kiss, and she fell back asleep. Angela has continued to stay with us, and Auntie Melinda isn't paying as much attention to her as I am. It's okay though, she's actually well-behaved and pretty intelligent. Before she goes, I want her to have a checkers match with Erika. Erika hasn't been released from the hospital yet, but they say her recovery is going fine. She should be out in a day or so. I haven't told her yet about that call, nor have I called the person back, nor have they called me. I need to soon though. If I don't work it out, they're going to go the system to work out whatever problem they have, and that never goes in my favor. I haven't told Erika either as I've continued to visit her every day. It can't be ignored forever though.
Thread 52 (date lost)

Good day to you /b/, blindmuteloli guy here again. Erika has been released from the hospital, she's been home for a bit. Let me describe for a bit the home environment with Erika and Angela together. What can I say, I'm just too damn popular. Angela took a liking to me while she's been staying here, and I think got a bit jealous when Erika came back. For example, Erika was one day laying on the couch with me sitting there, having her feet up on my lap. Angela decided she wanted to sit with me, so she tried to sit down. Erika promptly ejected Angela from the couch with her feet and onto the floor. Squabbling ensues, and of course I had to handle them both. I didn't want Erika involved in any confrontation since she's still recovering.
2

I decided to settle it by having that checkers match I was talking about. And thus, it began. It seemed pretty evenly matched at first. Pieces getting taken away back and forth between them. But slowly it began to turn in the favor of Erika. Angela noticed, and began panicking a bit. Eventually she was reduced to running around the board, trying to evade Erika. The game was already over. As Erika approached, she began to get more nervous. And by that, I mean she was taking the whole thing a bit too seriously. I began to ponder if I was perhaps irresponsibly perpetuating the rivalry. Angel was about to lose, so she picked up her remaining pieces and threw them at Erika's face. Erika was not happy, and she pounced over the board onto Angela (since she's assuming Angela would be on the other side) and it was about to turn into a catfight. I scooped up Erika and was holding her in my arm. "Now now girls if you can't play nice don't play at all." Erika, in my arm, was still grabbing for Angela. I turned around, and Erika's feet (turning with me) accidentally smacked Angela in the face. "She kicked me!" I sat Erika down on the couch. "No, I kicked you, I just used her feet. Now shutup." She angrily stormed out of the room. "What a bitch" Erika was later to comment. She's actually a good kid though as I've said, she can just be a bit rambunctious. Things took a bit more serious turn later though. I heard a knocking on Melinda's door, so I went open it. There standing was a man in a nice suit. "Is this Jake?" "Yes." "May I come in?" "It depends." "I think you got a phone call from me the other day." Okay, so now I had to let him in. Apparently he got tired of waiting for me to call him back (which I never did). At the same time, I never told Erika so this put me in a troublesome situation.
3

"As I think I mentioned, I represent Mr..." and once again Erika's last name. "What exactly do you mean by that? What Mister are we talking about?" "Erika's father." Now if this was TV drama, this is where the "to be continued" would appear and I wish it would have so I didn't have to deal with him. "He's not dead?" "No, who told you that?" "She did." He let out a sigh. "Erika's father is in prison. He wants Erika to visit." Personally, I wasn't really shocked that he wasn't dead. I had a suspicion for some time now. I definitely didn't like it though. "Absolutely not. You can leave now." He couldn't just go though. "You speak for her because she can't speak for herself? You're like those Child Protection guys." I wanted to punch him right in the face, but I controlled my temper. Like it or not, he was right. It was her decision, not mine. I brought him in. He sat down, and explained the situation to Erika. She started to not look good, and I was ready to kick the guy out. "So are you and a bunch of legal dogs going to force her to go?" "Well, no. Her father doesn't have custody anymore, he forfeited that right by going to prison. Neither of you are under any obligation to go. I'm not coming as a legal person, just as a friend of her father's really." Erika agreed to go though. I was shocked, I really didn't think she'd want to, and I don't want her to. I don't know this guy nor what he did to get into prison but I don't think it would be healthy. "Well okay then. I'll get you the information to go about scheduling a time, and the rules and whatnot. I'm not sure if he'll be able to have a contact visit though." For those of you who don't know, a contact visit is one in which the inmate and visitor are situated by a table and are able to be near each other. The other type is the usual visit with glass between the two. With that, he left.
4

"Are you sure you really want to go Erika?" She gently nodded her head. "Do you want to talk about it?" She nodded no. Then she looked down a bit, and eventually began writing. "I'm sorry." "Why?" "I lied to you about it." "It's okay.", and I gave her a hug. "Don't worry, I'll be there when you go visit your dad." She responded with a no. "No?" I was perplexed as she writing her response. She doesn't want me there? "He's not my dad. You are." Aw, she knows how to sweet talk me. Angela was listening from the stairs, and she came down. She gave a mumbling apology to Erika, but only so she could ask what was going on. "None of your business." She did a "tell me, tell me, tell me" over and over again until I finally said "If you get that excited you'll piss yourself again." Erika snickered a bit at her. "What are you laughing at!?" Uh-oh, more conflict. Once again I interjected. "Am I going to have to lock one of you in the closet?" I situated Erika on one side of the couch, Angela on the other, and me in between. "Now isn't this nice?" Angela looked across me and stuck her tongue out, but in all of her brilliance I don't think she got that Erika couldn't see it. They both tried to nuzzle me closer than the other, and I thought "Man, I am awesome." I haven't received any info from the man yet about visitation, but I've been doing a bit of my own research. I won't bring it up until he does though.
Thread 53 (11/22/07)

"The only thing you should drive is a fucking tricycle!" An example of the verbal abuse my gentle soul suffered this very Thanksgiving. Oh, but I didn't introduce myself. Some call me Jake, some call me merely OP, but you may call me Valentinez Alkalinella Xifax Sicidabohertz Gombigobilla Blue Stradivari Talentrent Pierre Andri Charton-Haymoss Ivanovici Baldeus George Doitzel Kaiser III. Well, I've been skimping on the openings lately (if you've been confused by this this is blindmuteloli guy).

First, I'll get this out of the way. The man did call me back, giving me info on prison visitation. As expected, it's a long and tedious process, but he's managed to speed it up a bit by preparing for it. The fact that he prepared so much makes me feel like he never had a doubt in his mind that we could say no, which makes me more reluctant to accept. But, it's what Erika wants.

Anyway, back to why you're really reading this. As I just mentioned, today does happen to be Thanksgiving. The day when the settlers stopped raping Squanto's children to sit down with him and eat corn. I woke up early, realized I didn't have to go to work, and spent the morning watching animu until Angela woke up. This was to be the last day she was spending with us, with her leaving tomorrow morning. I began to think it depressing that her parents were off on some extravagant vacation rather than spending Thanksgiving with their daughter, but it's not my place to judge. She was enjoyable to have around anyway. Erika and her have decided to end their rivalry, deciding that there's enough smooth, buttery, rich slices of Jake to go around. And oh was there.

Melinda woke up before me, and she was gone when I woke up. I assumed she was going to get groceries or some stuff for Thanksgiving today. She came home, and I asked her, "What are we having today?" She looked at me. "What do you mean?" "For Thanksgiving, ya know?" And then I knew had made a mistake. You can always see it in their eyes. "Just because I'm the only woman in the house I'm supposed to cook!? Why don't you get off of your lazy no rent paying ass and make some turkey?". Well shit. "...So you're not cooking?" "NO", and then she left the house again.

This conversation took place after Erika and Angela were already up and about. We all exchanged "Happy Thanksgiving" greetings, and went about our day apparently relying on the fact that Thanksgiving would pop out of absolutely nowhere with no effort on our part. As it turned out, this wasn't going to happen. Thus, I decided to make an uninvited visit to my parents' house, with Erika and Angela.

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Post Re: BlindMute Loli (B)
But before that, another thing came to mind. A certain spirit pervades us during the holiday season, a spirit of kindness. And I thought of a fellow, a chunky guy, who would be spending this holiday alone. Yes, you all know who. I know what you're thinking. "You want to drive him with two little girls in the car to your parents' house?" And yes, I would. But besides the holiday spirit, there was another aspect. It would give him a chance to see my sister. And as much as I detest their relationship, it is a promise I made.

Before heading on the road to see my parents', we stopped by Luke's apartment building. And who else did we run into other than two old women. Yes, it was them. The landlord's sister and the ex-wife. Of course, I had to investigate. "What are you doing here ladies?" The ex-wife approached me. "You're talking to the landlord, show some respect." Oh hell no. How did this happen? "He left this to... you?" The sister chimed in. "No. He left it to me. But I sold it to her." "How could she afford it?" "I gave it to her at a very low price." "Why would you do that?" And her voice suddenly turned a bit creepier. "I know it's the one thing my brother would never want. His hated ex-wife controlling what he's built up his entire life. Just call it payback for all of those unreturned phone calls, those years of him not caring." Time to the change the subject. "Is Luke here?" The ex-wife spoke again. "You mean fatass? I saw him waddling down the street, so no!" "Oh... well we just wanted to invite him to Thanksgiving..." "Well, sorry, but he's not here," his sister responded. "Okay then, I'll be going." I started to walk away, but after my first few steps I heard it. "However, we're free." Oh lord. Now I know I just ranted about the holiday spirit, but I didn't really want to take this vulgar old lady and the creepy vindictive old lady home to my parents.

They didn't seem to wait for an invitation though. His sister (and by the way, I think it's time I say their names, Gloria is hers) piled into the backseat with Erika and Angela (who didn't expect them at all). The ex-wife (Cheryl) sat up front with me, a perfect spot to criticize my driving. A few of the comments made: 1. "Pass this slow asshole I could drive faster with my teeth!" 2. "That dick is tailgating you put on the goddamn brakes show him who's the fucking boss." 3. "We should let her (Erika) drive, I bet she could do it better than you!" 4. "I'll be dead before we fucking get there, do you know how to use the goddamn accelerator?" "I'm going at the speed limit." "That's just a suggestion!" She also gave mean scrunched-up looks to Erika, who couldn't see them but was making jokes to Angela about the "old hag" behind her back. Cheryl was to comment on Angela, "You kidnap another one? At least you got the right color this time!" To address that, it appears that another comment of hers raised a question. If you'll notice, in my last thread I did mention (although it wasn't a huge mention) that Erika is asian. She's pale, but has very nice skin.

Even more fascinating than the vulgar woman sitting next to me though was the crazy one behind me. I was driving somewhat less than normal, because I couldn't keep my eyes off what was going on in the backseat. For example, Gloria put her hand on Angela's shoulder. "You're so pretty darling, you remind me of my own daughter." And then she clutched it harder and her voice got a bit more tense. "Who after 18 years of mooching decides she has no need to visit, call, write, or anything!" And then more tenseness and clutching. "Everybody who you really care for leaves you. My brother, my daughter, my husband killed hims--" I chimed to change the subject. "So, what's everybody's favorite Thanksgiving food?" Cheryl said, "Anything I can eat without my teeth in." Gloria said, "I've always liked pumpkin pie. I'm rather good at making them. My whole family used to love them. I should've made one." She added about 30 seconds later, "But then again looked what happened to all of them. I wouldn't want to kill your family." and she gave out an eerie laugh. I began to consider one of two possibilties: 1. This woman needs drugs. 2. She's taken way too many.

We finally arrived, and I rang the doorbell. My mother was ecstatic to see Erika, piniching her little cheeks, as was my dad. And then Angela walked in. My mother looked at me. "...Jake, another one? Can you afford this?" "Oh no no, this is Melinda's niece." "Oh, well then!" She began doing the same to Angela, but I noticed a slight bit of the Angela/Erika rivarly flaring up. And then my older escorts popped in. "Well, who are these fine ladies? Lucky, aren't we Jake?" my father so humorously greeted them. As expected, Cheryl greeted him sourly. "You ever had a pair of denchers shoved straight up your ass?" My dad was shocked, I think he expected her to be a kind old lady. Gloria got right up in his face. "You remind me of my husband..." but before she got into that I introduced them both formally. "Well, we were just about to sit down, please join us." Mother called my sister down, who was happy to see us all. There was a pretty big resemblance between my sister and Angela as it turns out. Cheryl commented on my sister, "Who's the hussy?". Later, she was also recorded to say to my sister: "My legs invented the miniskirt!" Now, if that line doesn't sound funny enough, you have to imagine a sour grating rough sort of voice, like she's been smoking for too long. And as for her legs, vein city.

My sister was noticably nicer to me this time too. She even came up to me, and rather sweetly said, "Jake, I'm sorry if I've ever been a hassle for you." "Are you on some sort of twelve step program?" It was nice though. Sadly, we couldn't stay very long after eating. Cheryl commented on the meal that "I'm so old I'll eat any shit." As we were leaving, Gloria started getting a bit weepy. "It's so nice to be with family..." Erika and Angela said goodbye to mom and pop, both of them managing to get money from them, my sister gave me a nice hug, and we left. In the car, Gloria was crying. I didn't want anything to do with it, so I just left her alone. Poor Angela had to sit right next to her, and from the look on her face she was pretty mortified by this old woman. Cheryl bet me 50 bucks that my sister would get pregnant in a month. I could only respond, "I'm not entirely sure I'd sure win that bet..." Erika was completely happy though. She rather enjoyed the meal, and sat contentedly holding her stomach the entire way home.
Thread 54 (11/31/07)

It's been a while /b/, but blindmuteloli guy is here again. An average day it was, but you know when I start with that something has to happen or there wouldn't be a thread. I went home, to find my lovely Erika as usual. Except... the fleshlight. She was holding the fleshlight. Why was she holding the fleshlight!? She had her fingers in the hole! "Uuuh what are you doing with that!?" Luckily she took her fingers out of the hole to write, "What's this?". "Where did you find that?" "On the couch, I sat right on it." And then walked in Melinda, giving me a look and sum lip. So I walked right up to her, looked her in the face, and I smacked her right in the face. Well, it was more like a punch. Enough to knock her to the ground. She sat on the ground holding her bruised face, looking up at me in shock. "HUH!? YOU GOT SOMETHING YOU WANT TO SAY? WHAT WERE YOU GONNA SAY?"
2

Okay I didn't actually punch her. In actuality she began a bitchy tirade. "Why do you have a fleshlight Jake?" Erika was utterly confused by this word, but she probably should've been sent out of the room. "Why were you looking through my stuff?" Erika, who had it again, was about to put it up to her nose to smell it until Melinda grabbed it, and went to throw it in the trashcan. ;_: A single tear streamed down my face. The senor was dead. "Honestly, how disgusting!" Melinda walked past me on last time with a look of contempt. "Pfft, pervert!" This, of course, was an outrage. A man's fleshlight is nobody's business but his own! But, before I dealt with this grave insult, I had to deal with Erika. "What's a fleshlight?" Damnit Melinda. "Err... it's like a flashlight." "What's the hole for?" "Storing... food." "Why did Melinda throw it away?" "I left stale food in there." "Why did she call you a pervert?" Time to change the subject. "What did you do today?" "Don't change the subject, pervert."
3

After I finally finished that discussion, I got a call from Luke. He was wondering what I wanted the day I came to look for him, and I told him I merely wanted to invite him to my parents' house. He of course had to act bitchy and indignant at this, but then he told me something that made me understand why he was in a bad mood. "I fucked her." No context, no explanation, so apparently my job was to get it out of him. "Who?" "The new landlord." Oh lord. I had to stop myself from laughing, but little chortles escape from my mouth. "Are you serious?" "...Yeah." "Why would you do that?" "Uh... well she's sorta lonely." "You're fucking with me, right?" "No." "Why are you telling me this?" "Uuuh I just wanted to tell somebody..." and then he hung up. Personally, I wanted some details. I still don't know if I believe him, but then again it is Luke. I'm surprised that her pelvis wouldn't break or something, she's pretty damn old. I wondered if she took her dentures out when she gave him a blowjob. And where she put them after she took them out.
4

Old people aside, The next day when I got home from work, Erika looked mortified to see me. As it would have it, she asked her older friend Melanie what a fleshlight was, and she just happened to know. She explained to dear Erika that, and many other things. "That's what the hole is for..." "Uuuh yeah." I really didn't want to have this conversation. "I have one too..." "Uuuh yeah." "One's supposed to go in the other!?" "Uuuh yeah." "How do they fit?" Still really wanted to end this conversation. "Magic." "Magic?" "Yeah, magic." She appeared to think about that for a second, before writing very largely: "Shutup, you're a liar and a pervert."
5

*walks off stage*
6

*walks back on*
7

One more thing, did I forget to mention that all of the paperwork and stuff is filled out, and I'm officially ready to became Erika's legalized parent? Erika and I need to go to finalize it, but once we do that it will be absolutely complete. Of course I'm still going to be being watched, but I'll oficially be her guardian. I haven't told Erika yet, since I'm sort of saving it. Tomorrow perhaps we'll do something to celebrate and then I'll spring it on her.


Thread 55 (12/05/07)

Hello /b/, blindmuteloli guy here. I've been neglecting to update because of my busy schedule (lol animu), so the events of this thread happened a few days ago. Erika got up, and I could tell she was in a bad mood. She had a perfectly good reason to be in one too. "We don't have to go if you don't want to..." But she was resolute on it. Yes, we were going to the prison.
2

We dressed up in nice clothing (the dress code is rather strict, if you don't adhere to it exactly you get thrown out) and left. She was completely untalkative (unwritive perhaps?) the whole way there (although it's not a good idea to read and drive). At this time, I was still somewhat in the dark about the situation as well. I didn't look up any information on this guy, what he did, why he was in prison. Part of me felt like it wasn't something I had the right to snoop for, part of me was just afraid to know. Either way, we arrived. Since it was our first time, I signed in on a sheet and signed some stuff. In the waiting room there was nobody else except for a younger girl, middle aged woman, and an older woman (I know, it seems like I run into a lot of them these days). She wasn't the crazy kind though. She was very pleasant, waiting to see her son. I talked to her a bit, she was reluctant to divulge anything about her son, but it was a nice talk. I saw a younger girl dressed inappropriately get her ass kicked out, to which the old woman could sympathize. They kicked her out last time.
3

It was eventually our turn, and we went in. There he was, behind plexiglass. He was a small unintimidating man, quiet looking, hunched over in his chair. He smiled when he saw Erika, it was completely creepy though. It felt completely odd seeing this guy, Erika's father. It didn't feel like he was that all. "Hi there, it's been a long time since you've seen me." His voice was almost silent, hard to hear. I noticed that Erika was acting funny. "Don't you want to talk to me?" She looked like she was trying to write something, but she couldn't. Her pen was going all over the paper but not writing anything. There was a long pause. "Do you think daddy is a bad person? You know it wouldn't have happened if mommy didn't make daddy mad." At this point I had heard enough, Erika was freaking out. That comment he made freaked me out too. "What's the notebook for?" That was the last thing he said before we just walked out. I held her, she looked like she was having some sort of panic attack. "Shhh, it's okay, he's not in the room anymore." She was trembling, I didn't expect her to react so badly. She was crying, I dried her tears a bit and we left. After a bit in the car, she wrote something for me. "I'm sorry." "Why?" "I made you drive out here, I couldn't talk to him." "It's okay." I was still mulling over those comments he made in my mind. "...if mommy wouldn't make daddy mad." Didn't want to think about what that implied. And "what's the notebook for?" That seemed to implied she wasn't always mute.
4

But, I did have a little surprise for her. Our adoption hearing was today. Now, for those of you who haven't adopted a child, the final step in adoption is appearing before a judge. He interviews you for 30-60 minutes, and then signs a paper which officially establishes the family unit as legitimate. The judge was sort of intimidating, but Sharon was there. Somebody from CPS had to show up, and it was her. The judge started off with some preliminary stuff, but eventually just asked me. "Why do you want to adopt this child?" I smiled, one of those smiles where you know you're about to ramble on like an idiot but you don't care because everything is just so wonderful. "Well, I'm young, some people think that makes me irresponsible. I don't have tons of money, or nice car, or anything like that. But nobody loves her as much as I do." *applause* Erika was smiling, hugging me, it was a great moment. The judge started to speak again. "Well personally I'm vehemently against giving a child to somebody so young..." ;_; "...but I've heard good enough things about you, so I'm signing your adoption order. Congratulations." With a few strokes of the pen, it's official. She's my daughter, legally! It was absolutely wonderful. Driving home, I felt like telling everyone. I stopped when we got by Luke's apartment building even to tell him. He was there at the beginning. There I saw Cheryl. "You looking for some?" "Eh, some what?" In being so elated about the good news, I was completely confused about what she meant. "Yeah, I fucked fatty, do you want some too?" "Whaat..." And then it hit me. The conversation I had with Luke on the phone all came back to me. Instead of continuing this and ruining my happiness, I rushed back to my car and drove away and left hagwoman in my dust.
5

So yeah, she's mine completely. CPS is finally off my back, ri--.... wrong! CPS offers a multitude of post-adoption "services", including support groups, phone services, etc. Which basically means "we're still watching you like nigras watch the KFC sign to see when it changes to 'open'". But either way, she's definitely mine. She's upstairs now, wrapped up like a little egg in a bunch of blankets since it's freezing here. Nobody can take her from me now.
Thread 56 (12/13/07)
12/13/07(Thu)03:40:09 No.48209888

Hullo /b/, blindmuteloli guy here. Today's thread isn't very pleasant sadly. Now if you remember the last thread, you know we went to visit Erika's father. That was, as I said, creepy as hell. He did question her notebook that she had with her though, which made me wonder. I decided to consult a medical person about the matter, and since I couldn't get a real doctor I had to settle for a psychiatrist. I decided to go alone, I didn't really intend to be there a while. I just wanted some sort of opinion. I was able to get an appointment with this guy pretty easily, and I settled in the waiting room to do what waiting people do. Eventually, I was called in. He introduced himself, as did I, and I asked him if he had any experience in dealing with mute people. "Ah, but you're not mute. "I understand that but..." and then I told him about Erika, and gave him a brief description of what happened in my life recently. I was just wondering what you all were, that is if she's born mute or if she could be mute from some psychological trauma. After I finish telling him, he asks me if I'm sure Erika is real. "Yeah, why?" He gives me a raised eyebrow. "Do you ever see anything unusual?" "Like what?" "Things that aren't really there?" "What? How does this relate to my problem?" Eventually after a bit more back and forth, he offered to prescribe something. That's when I left thinking what the fuck. I didn't have too much faith in this guy, but I didn't know that he'd think that Erika was some sort of schizophrenic hallucination of mine. As I left, I could hear him saying "that guy was nuts!" in the background.

Footnote: I, the actual OP Jake, have been banned from 4chan for quite sometime. I've been having people post the threads on 4chan for me for a while, so this is the first one in a while I'm actually posting myself. Damn you thread made by mootle, damn you to hell. All the threads have been written by me though, so don't worry.
12/13/07(Thu)03:41:18 No.48209961

Maybe I sound crazy when I talk. After that, I went to go pick Erika up from Jim's place, and since that guy's office was pretty close still I decided to go back. I did have to pay for that little "session" with him. I came back, and had Erika write "you're nuts" for him. He seemed genuinely shocked. "Oh, she does exist?" "Yes." "Why didn't you bring her in the first place?" And then he laughed. "So she can't speak?" "Yeah, isn't it obvious?" "I see. Well then she might be mute due to some trauma..." and he went and explained everything I thought. But then he added: "I could maybe prescribe some Prozac to help her anxiety." "No thanks." Well, Dr. Sellmepills PhD agrees with what I thought all along. On the way home, Erika was in a bad mood, crossing her arms in her seat. When we got home, I asked her if anything was the matter.
12/13/07(Thu)03:42:08 No.48210010

"That guy was a liar." "Well he was a bit nutty himself." "He said I don't talk because I don't want to. That's not true." "Well, he didn't necessarily mean it like that. All he meant is that sometimes people who talk sometimes have trouble getting words out. It happens to everybody, and sometimes they lose that ability all together. It doesn't mean that they don't want to, all it means is that their voice isn't really broken." I was trying to explain it, something about even though mute people who don't talk may want to, but subconsciously not allow themselves to. Selective mutism is the term, although Erika isn't technically selectively mute since she never talks, she is for the same reason though so I guess she's just at the extreme end of the spectrum. Eventually she started telling me about her father. From what she told me, he wasn't a nice guy. Apparently the reason he ended up in jail is because he used to beat Erika's mom. And by beat, I mean pretty severely. The woman is dead after all, though I don't know specifically if he beat her to death. Imagine how horrifying that would be, if you're blind in the first place, you can't see anything, and all you hear is your mom screaming and your dad beating her up and kicking her around. I don't know if he ever beat Erika, but he's definitely not a nice guy. Soon enough Erika started getting upset as she usually does when she talks about them, so we stopped and I put her to bed. I guess this means there's a chance she can talk, I don't know if it would be any time soon though. On another note, I learned from the internuts that Prozac is used to treat mute children. But, it often leads to more depression, suicide, and, oddly enough, damage to the parts of the brain taht are supposed to help produce language.
Thread 57 12/26/07

A nappy headed ho ho ho to you, /b/. The Blindmute Loli guy is here with (the day after) Christmas tidings (and actually it's two days after as the clock just struck twelve). To start off the Christmas festivities, Erika and I left for my parents' house last Friday to spend some time there.

The car trip was long as usual, but it was just Erika and me (and if anybody complains saying it should be "Erika and I" I'll go into a grammar rant). We saw a guy dressed up as Santa Claus at a rest area. I wasn't exactly sure if Erika still believed in Santa, but by asking you sort of give it away. I don't know if I approve of people systematically lying to their kids, but if the lie is already ingrained in her I couldn't crush her 8 year old spirit. I took her into the male restroom with me since she wouldn't be able to get around the female one. We walked in and a guy at a urinal sort of jumped and pissed on himself. We both finished anyway, and I was staring at Santa (who was smoking) on our way out. He seemed to be a bit pissed by this, and gave me a snide comment. "What are you looking at fagboy? I may have to wear the fucking costume but at least I don't look like a goddamn elf." Erika tried to kick him, but she was actually facing the opposite direction. As he was laughing at this ill-fated attempt, I turned her around and she did it again. You'd be surprised how much small feet can hurt when they go in the testicles. As Santa recovered, we crept away. We arrived, and when we walked in the door we found an odd sight. My parents and sister were in odd colorful garments huddled around candles. They said they have disavowed Christmas and were going to celebrate the struggles and achievements of African culture with Kwanzaa.

Did you know there's 7 principles to Kwanzaa? There's umoja (unity). Which means something like if there's a black man on one side of the street and a white man on the other you should walk on the side with the black man. There's Kujihchahcjchagula (Self-determination). It means even if you shoot whitey, you're not done yet. Shoot him again to make sure he's dead and then rape his wife. There's ujima (collective responsibility). If a black man is being chased by the evil white ass policeman, lend him your bullets.

Okay I'm done with that. In actuality it was decorated like Frosty the snowman threw up all over the inside of our house. I'm no scrooge, but there was Christmas fucking everywhere. You couldn't use the bathroom without having to sit down on a Christmas themed toilet seat cover. I might be a scat fetishist (but keep it under your hat), but I want to shit in Mrs. Claus's mouth, not Santa. Vulgar Christmas-bashing aside, my parents as usual overzealously greeted Erika, leaving me with nothing. And before you know it, my mom whisked herself off into the other room and then back with two present boxes. I already knew exactly what was in them, but Erika was sadly hopeful that something worthy might be in the box. We both opened them up, and inside were two very ugly Christmas sweaters. We both put them on, and Erika seemed to enjoy them (because she couldn't actually see them) because my mother was giving her so much praise in it. My sister came down, and she didn't have one on. "Why doesn't she have to wear one?" "You know teens these days, they just want to look 'cool'." "Maybe I want to look cool." And she let out a big laugh as if that was a ridiculous proposition.

"So, do you have any real presents?" "Not now, be patient. Jake is always so impatient, isn't he Erika?" And then she nodded. "Who's side are you on?" Dinner was ready, and it had been a long trip, so we were both hungry. My dad tried to pick Erika up, and we heard a bit of a crack. "You okay dad?" "That kid's bigger than Ithought." Erika was offended at this comment about her weight, but upon reminding her of Luke she was relieved. The good thing about weight is that there's always somebody fatter than you.

We ate, and it was already getting late. My parents retired to their bedroom, but Erika and I weren't ready yet. Wanting to find something to do, we pulled out the one thing guaranteed to put everybody to sleep: Monopoly. My sister played with us too since you can't really play it with only two people. All Erika could really do is roll the dice and hope that we weren't cheating her out of anything (which we didn't). As expected, we didn't finish it, and by the time we were done we were ready to go to sleep. I fell asleep, but was soon awoken. In the doorway I saw my sister, in nothing but her underwear. "Hey there Jakey, want a real Christmas present?" She pounced on me like a tiger, and began lightly stroking my crotch. And then I woke up, and my sheets and pants were sticky. Years later when I want to get a good job or run for president somebody's going to pull those last three sentences up and use them against me. I actually did have a dream once though where I came cookie dough that formed little gingerbread men and they.... well, that's off-topic.

Getting back on track, I woke up the next day (I guess that's obvious though), and Erika was already awake. I found her in the living room laying on her face. I was worried at first that she tumbled completely down the stairs, but as it turns out she just fell off the little step that's there. There's an actual set of stairs, which pretty much most stairs are relatively the same so she could get down them fine. What she forget was the one little step thing that was beyond that. She was fine though, apparently she just decided to stay there. During the day I got the presents that I bought from out of the trunk of the car and put them under the tree, except for a few. These were the "Santa" presents. The days passed until Christmas, and we spent them doing the usual family stuff. My sister was always off running around with another boy (I know, I should've kicked all of their asses). Erika asked me if I thought she'd have that many boyfriends when she was my sister's age. "Fuck no."

And soon Christmas Eve approached. Now I had it all planned out. I was going to sneak down at night as Santa and put the gifts under the tree. Nothing fancy, no costume or bells or shit like that. As much as I tried to prod her upstairs, Erika fell asleep on the couch. This wouldn't be a hinderance though, I would just have to be a bit quieter as I snooped downstairs. Snoop I did, lightly going down the stairs. The things creaked everytime I stepped on one, so I had to be careful. As I got down the last step though, walking off of it I was hit right in the face. I could tell that it was a notebook that had smacked me, so I knew exactly who it was. It didn't hurt, but blocked my vision so I fell off the same little step she did. Hearing the thud, she jumped right on top of my back. Trying to capture Santa, was she? I suppose all kids try to at least once. Well maybe not assault him like Erika was, but see him. I looked back, and she presented me with a notebook page with writing on it. I could tell she probably prepared it during the day, and probably thought her whole plan out. Her being asleep was fake apparently. Anyway, the notebook said in large letters "Are you Santa?". It was hard to read in the dim light, but I managed. I tried to put on a deeper Santa voice and said "Why yes little girl." She got off of me at this, and I went to under the tree. I couldn't see, so I flipped on the light switch. Then I realized we made some cookies earlier to leave for Santa. "Where are my cookies little girl?" She looked sort of embarassed, before writing "I was hungry." I finished, and realized I needed to make an exit. "Err... ho ho ho and merry Christmas." I went back up the stairs (which was a stupid action for somebody supposed to be playing Santa to do), and Erika stopped me one last time. "Goodnight Jake." Mission failed, as I hung my head in shame and went back up the stairs.

Looking back on it, I don't think she believed in Santa, I think she just wanted to catch me. If she was looking for Santa, she would've been by the fireplace. It was Christmas day though, time to open up the presents.

My parents got Erika a lot of cute clothes, and a book on sign language. I actually went with that same idea, and got her some informational materials on moon type (which is like braille, but uses a different system) and a new mp3 player since her old one was destroyed. I decided I wouldn't lick the shit out of Steve Jobs's ass this time though and didn't get an iPod. I got my sister some clothes (and I took a little jab at her by wrapping up some socks that I got her in a condom box). My parents didn't find it funny at all. They did a look like, "...Oh god we know it's true, don't rub it in." I got my mom a foot massager thing, and my dad some DVDs. I myself got some games for my Wii from my parents. Erika had nothing for me, but said she'd model her new clothes for me. She looked extremely cute in them (but when doesn't she, she even looked cute in that ugly sweater), and she gave me a kiss for being a good Santa.

We had to leave though to get back home. My parents gave Erika a last hug (and a few more, with me being left out), and we were off. There were no Santa cosplayers to be seen on the way home. Walking in the door, I heard it. "Oh look it's the Christmas asshole." I could recognize that grainy smoky grinding want to shoot myself with a shotgun come back to life and throw myself off of a bridge voice: it was the landlord's ex-wife AGAIN. I thought at that moment "WHY DOES THIS WOMAN KEEP STALKING ME?". She was accompanied by Gloria too, who apparently must live in the area. Apparently Melinda had invited all of her relatives to come on Christmas. How the two old women got in, I didn't know. Melinda informed me. "Well Cheryl and Gloria showed up and I couldn't just turn them away..." Fuck fuck fuck. I also ran into Melinda's other relatives, who were pretty southern. Now in Ohio you can run into some pretty southerny people, but these were authentic church every Sunday the Civil War isn't over southerners. I met Angela's (Melinda's niece if you need a reminder) mother, who was fatter than I expected. Way fatter. This woman was HUGE. She had to take breaths in between words when she spoke a lot, it was crazy. "Angela said you were very nice to her, and pretty cute... I agree." And then she licked her lips, I swear to god she licked her lips and gave me eyes like she wanted to serve me up on a plate with some barbecue sauce. At this point I lamented. I'm so popular among fat women, elderly women, and other undesirable partners but can't get a gf to save my balls. Getting away from her, I sat down next to Gloria who looked as absent minded and drugged up as usual. "Jake, do you know how they have Santas at the mall?" "Uh yeah." "Do you think the Santas ever push the children off and hurt them?" "I would hope not." "Do you believe in Santa Jake?" "Well no..." "I do, I saw him coming down my chimney." "Is that so..." "He had elves and reindeer and..." and she continued ranting as I walked away. Walking up the steps to see my room, I passed by Luke. I bet Cheryl dragged him along. He once again didn't meet my gaze. As I climbed up the steps I could hear the shrill cry of "Fatass get me a beer!" Going into my room, two little kids began screaming at me. One of them threw my Wiimote right at my face. I assumed they were relatives of Melinda's. Seeing as they all looked like they came from a bible belt area, I was going to give them a scare. Nobody throws my Wiimote and gets away with it. "Who are you?" they asked me so innocently. "I am Satan. You have been terrible children and I'm coming to drag you to hell." And then I raised my hands ominously and yelled "FEEL THE RAGE OF THE FLAMES OF HELL!". They began screaming down the stairs and began bawling. I laughed a bit, but realized that fat middle-aged women are the type who raise hell over these sorts of these things. I went down the stairs, and Erika was sitting on the couch. Walking further, I was greeted by a raging woman. "What are you saying to my kids?" "Just a little joke..." "Do you think Jesus is a joke!? He died for you!" Melinda pulled me aside. "Jake, be nice!" "Your relatives are a bit off..." "I know, she's been bugging me about church the whole time she's been here!" Going back into the kitchen, I decided to see what other relatives were around. There was a large man asleep in a chair, his hat over his face. I waved my hand in front of him, and to my surprise he grabbed it almost instantly. It was creepy, like some Resident Evil shit. He squeezed it a bit, and then let go of it. Without removing the hat, he said "You the boy trying to fuck my daughter?" "Melinda? No, not at a--" "Boy you betta make sure nothing happens. Boy I tell you if you try to do anything to my baby girl that hand aint the only thing I'll be squeezing I tell you now boy I'll pop that nasty ass thing off right now you undastand me?" "Uh... yes sir." I went back to Melinda. "Who the fuck was that?" "That's my dad, he wasn't too happy when I told him we were living together." "Did you give him the wrong idea?" "No!" Cheryl put her arm around me. "You don't have anything to worry about this boy is my sex machine." ;_; And they say men don't get sexually harassed. Gloria chimed in rather excitedly, "Sex machine!?" I think she was imagining a different kind of sex machine. Well I couldn't deal with the crazies in the kitchen, so I went back into the other room only to find Melinda's sister lecturing Erika on God. "What are you doing?" "I don't want this girl to have a heathen upbringing." "Ma'am you need to stop worrying about preaching and start worrying about jogging to church." And then I heard Melinda's dad again, who seems to have some creepy omniscience that allows him to hear and see everything. "Boy you messing with my other baby girl? Boy I tell you what you give her lip you won't come home with a face you undastanding me boy?" Luckily all of the craziness was broken by the fact that dinner was ready, and since Erika and I hadn't eaten we decided to. Angela and Erika both sat next to me, trying to get as close as possible. The two younger relatives made a mess of everything. Stupidly I asked where Melinda's mom was. They all looked at me like I have killed their pet dog. "She's in heaven with the good lord now," said Melinda's sister. "Boy I tell you she could cook up good back in her day." "Well Melinda this is a good meal too, you're a good cook when you do it," I said, trying to be complimentary. Melinda's dad still looked at me with burning disapproval (and he finally had his hat off, revealing his eyes fixated upon me). "Boy I'm about to give you a double order of shut the hell up." I don't even know what I said! Maybe he perceived some sexual innuendo. Cheryl had to come in with one of her insults, which are almost so expected now that they're not really amusing. "My husband served in 'Nam and he was in a POW camp, I bet he got better food than this shit." And I'm pretty damn sure my landlord never served in 'Nam either.

Melinda's sister was pissed though. "You don't have to eat it then!" She then promptly declared that dinner was over, and began collecting the plates. I wasn't actually finished, which I expressed but she didn't seem to care. Erika was pissed that her plate was taken away, she gave Melinda's sister a kick in the rear. "Did that child just kick me!?" Erika grabbed around like she wanted her notebook, and I promptly retrieved it from a nearly table for her. "It's not my fault your ass is so big!" Ah, just what I was hoping. Melinda's sister went to smack Erika, but I grabbed her hand. "Hey, don't touch my daughter." Melinda's dad got up out of his chair. "Oh boy it's on now you touch my baby girl you gonna get an ass-whoopin'!" The younger relatives, apparently caught up in the excitement, began throwing Melinda's plates around. Cheryl was laughing her head off at the turmoil she started so much that I thought her dentures were going to fall out. Melinda's dad put up his fists and ordered me to do the same. "C'mon boy put em up Imma send you to the moon and back boy." "I'm not going to fight an ol--" but before I could finish my sentence, he actually punched me. It didn't hurt too bad, but I couldn't retaliate, because it's not nice to hit the elderly. Gloria began to get into it. "Get the lamp Jake!" "Luke told you the lamp sto--?" but before I could finish that sentence he hit me again. Alright, now I was getting pissed off. But before I could launch a retaliatory attack, Melinda slammed her fist against the wall. It was the moment that breaks up all the turmoil and leaves everybody standing at attention. And she was pissed. "I want you all to shut the fuck up, I want you all to clean this kitchen the fuck up, and then I want you all to fucking leave." This wasn't yelling, this was this burning angry voice. And we all stopped, and did as she was told. We all cleaned up, forgetting what we were quarreling about for the moment. And after we cleaned up, they prepared to leave without saying goodbye to Melinda who was upstairs. I tried to make nice with her father as he walked out the door. "No hard feelings sir?" "Boy, you ever heard the term shotgun wedding? You take out the wedding and that's the kind of relationship we have." Angela wanted to say goodbye to me, but she was scuttled out the door quickly by her mother who gave me a dirty look. She began to say something in the doorway but I just slammed the door in her face.

A few moments later, Gloria asked, "Is the fight over?" with an excited face like she wanted more action. "Yes, he's gone. You two should go home." Cheryl yelled for Luke, who jumped up. As he passed me, he gave me a gift. "Jake...I uuh... got you, you know..." and he hurried off but I stopped him. "Thanks. Merry Christmas Luke." He actually smiled at me a bit. "Merry Christmas." That guy's not all bad. Once everybody was gone, I went up to go apologize to Melinda but luckily she wasn't mad at me. "I'm mad at my crazy ass relatives. Did my dad hurt you?" "Nah, I'm fine. Don't worry, I'll beat up plenty of Erika's boyfriends too." And then there was that awkward silence, I had said something odd. "Boyfriend", implying the same relationship between us. But no, this wasn't where we admitted our true feelings for each other and all that shit. I left, and Erika had me do some sign language with her. Eventually she fell asleep on me with the book still open. I poked my nose a bit, it still sort of hurt when I touched it. But I looked down at sleeping Erika in my arms. This was a damn good Christmas.


Thread 58
01/02/08(Wed)04:12:05 No.49749861

Evenin' /b/, Jake the blindmute loli man here again. The Sun has made one more revolution around the Earth (don't let heathens tell you the opposite) and it's 2008. We have 4 more years before the apocalypse, we've managed to evade Y2K for 8 years, Al Gore is still hyping up this "global warming" which must be the successor to his famous internet invention, Ron Paul is leading a revolution, I shit in Luke's mouth, Evangelion is still cool, Chris Benoit is getting thrown out of a train, and Super Smash Brothers will probably get delayed again. Find the false phrase in that last sentence, and win a prize. No, but seriously, New Year's Eve was yesterday as you all should know unless you live in Yurop or some other country where people still ride horses to town and fight dragons. Melinda had a get together for New Year's Eve (and luckily for me none of her family came). All of the neighbors showed up, and I mean all of them, a lot of people I had never met before.
01/02/08(Wed)04:13:27 No.49749962

I really wish she hadn't though, because Erika was sick. I was sick the day before, and I apparently gave her what I had. I could tell throughout the day she wasn't feeling very well. The party started, and all of the neighbors soon arrived. Melinda had a bunch of stuff set out, and I thought maybe Erika would feel better if she ate a bit. I took her into the kitchen, and just as she arrived she began clutching her mouth. I knew she was about to vomit, so I tried to grab a can for her to do it into but she just grabbed around until she found the nearest thing that felt like a container. It was a bowl of dip Melinda had made. I rushed her up to the bathroom, but she didn't have anymore to spew. I put her into bed, and went down to clean up the vomit. There was a rather husky woman by the bowl, about to dip into it. I grabbed her hand. "You shouldn't eat that." Suddenly she became very indignant. "Why not, huh? You think I shouldn't eat because I'm too fat? Well look here!" And without looking down, she put a chip right through the dip and took a bite. "Well I just did, so you mind your ow--" but before she could finish she spat the whole thing out. "This is terrible!" "I was trying to tell you that somebody just vomited in it." And then she looked like she was about to vomit. I was hoping she didn't, because I didn't want another mess to clean up. This is what happens when you're a bitch to prove a point, especially if you're a fatty.
01/02/08(Wed)04:14:39 No.49750059

I cleaned up the mess, and went back up to Erika. She definitely had a temperature, but I didn't really know what to do about it. Looking through various cabinets, we had no medicine to give. When I went back up, she was already asleep though. I went back, and Melinda asked me if anything happened to the fat woman who just ate vomitdip. She apparently left yammering about fat discrimination and how Melinda's house is a pigsty. I told her the story, and she found it quite funny. "Now what's this about a little vomaroosky?" Jim came up behind us, him and his family had just arrived. I told him and his wife Cynthia the story, and they both found it equally hilarious. "Oh yeah I tell you Jake when Melanie got sick one time she was throwing it up all over, there were chunks everywhere. She threw up..." and he proceeded to give us an exact (or at least it sounded as such) account of where she vomited. Jim has a good memory about the oddest things. Eric was also there, and he still gave me the look of a beaten dog. Gloria and Cheryl were also there (though they weren't invited, not that they care. If they hear about it, they're going) and were being their usual selves. Gloria remarked, "Oh they wear their pants tight these days..." To which Cheryl replied, "I like it, that kid's got a fine ass." "You know he's only 15 right?" I interjected. "Eh shutup I'm going to be dead in a few years anyways I might as well chase the young ones while I still have some life in these old bones." And coincidentally, that's when I spotted Luke. I greeted him in a much more genial manner than I think he expected. "Hey Luke! What's going on buddy? Hold on, I'll be back in a sec." Since Luke bought me something, I went and bought him something. I retrieved it, and presented him with it. "You didn't have to..." but he was visibly happy to get it. A new year is a time to bury old grudges, right?
01/02/08(Wed)04:16:24 No.49750188

I went to go check on Erika, and I could've sworn I heard some footsteps. Maybe it was Erika walking around. I looked in her room, and she was asleep though. The door was definitely open however, and I didn't leave it that way. I checked around some more, but didn't see anybody. And then I saw something in the corner of my eye. In my room, under my bed. Was it a ghost? No. A monster? No. It was none other than girlpants. Now if you don't remember much about our friend Eric, I'll revive your memory with an excerpt of a thread of the past: "It seems Emo Eric, Jim's son, has a bit of anonymous in him. He was playing truth or dare with Erika, Melanie, and Amelia and dared Erika to kiss him. She refused, and luckily she had the good sense to tell me. I told her not to play those kinds of games with Eric, but there's still the matter of what to do with him. Unlike Luke, he's not my friend, and he went for the Erika directly so he's in a shitload trouble with met seems Emo Eric, Jim's son, has a bit of anonymous in him. He was playing truth or dare with Erika, Melanie, and Amelia and dared Erika to kiss him. She refused, and luckily she had the good sense to tell me. I told her not to play those kinds of games with Eric, but there's still the matter of what to do with him. Unlike Luke, he's not my friend, and he went for the Erika directly so he's in a shitload trouble with me." And the next day: "Then he came to the opening of his room, which I entered and before he realized I had came in behind him I was holding him by his shirt against the wall. I put on my best slightly-crazy looking face, one that says "I just jerked off in the pancake batter." He didn't scream or struggle, he just gave me the deer in the headlights look." And it continued on like that.
01/02/08(Wed)04:17:46 No.49750274

So girlpants + sleeping Erika + him snooping around upstairs, not a good combination.I pulled him out from under my bed, and I was a bit pissed. Like a vulture, trying to swoop down on my Erika as she was sick in bed. I dragged him a long a bit by his shirt and then pushed him straight into the bathroom. He tumbled a bit before toppling right into the shower, knocking down all of the soaps and shampoos in it. This made a large thud. "Shit, you stay here, I'm not done with you." I went to the stairs. "Got a problem up there Jakearoni?" "Nah, I just spilled something in the bathroom." "Oh okay, have you seen Eric?" "Oh yeah he's up here, he's going to help me clean it up." Alrighty then." I walked back into the bathroom, but he wasn't there. He wanted to play hide and seek, did he?

I went all up and down the rooms, but to no avail. He had evaded me well, I'll give him that. Eventually I really couldn't find him anywhere, so I went back downstairs to find him there. He looked at me and gave me a little shit smirk. And then he touched the back of his foot with his hand. I didn't understand what this gesture meant. I had to get him back though. I couldn't beat his ass there, but I vowed to get revenge.

Mark and Sharon had arrived too, along with Mark's mother in a wheelchair. If you don't recall, Mark's mom is pretty crazy. She's a mean old woman, and legitimately mean like she really wants to get out of the wheelchair and stab you, not like Cheryl who loves making people want to stab themselves. "Hey it's Jake! Where's the midget?" "She's upstairs." "What, did she get lost? Forget her cane?" Now there's one guy I really wanted to punch in the face. Sharon elbowed him in the side. "How is she Jake?" "She's good, a bit sick though." Mark's mom wheeled her way over to Cheryl. Two mean old ladies together, I could tell this wasn't going to end well. Mark's mom began, apparently seeing that Cheryl reeked of a smoker. "You got a cig and a light?"
01/02/08(Wed)04:19:16 No.49750374

Cheryl of course had to have her mean spirited reply. "You don't need to smoke, you're already ugly enough." Mark's mom, who has a short fuse, exploded. She hit Cheryl right in the stomach with her cane (and I realized the irony insulting my loli about using a cane, which she doesn't). Cheryl was legitimately shocked by this, and her face took on that expression. Even though it's not good for old lady assault to be taking place, it was pleasing to have Cheryl's usually scrunched up mean looking expression wiped off her face for the moment. Mark's mom began carrying on, waving her cane around, becoming the center of attention until Mark wheeled her off (earning himself a few whacks which was funny). Before I could fully enjoy the situation, Melanie came down the steps asking what happened in the bathroom. I realized I didn't clean it up, so before anyone had the chance to inspect the situation (in which they would clearly see some sort of struggle had happened) I rushed up there. And when I went into the bathroom, she was already sitting down to piss, so she let out a little shriek and I left. She finished, and came back out. "Why were you trying to look at me huh?" "I just wanted to clean up the bathroom. Why don't you lock the door?" "If there weren't perverts like you I wouldn't have to. What went on in the tub, huh?" "Nothing." "Do I have to scream and say you tried to look at me?" Urgh, little bitch. "Fine. I caught Eric snooping around up here, that's what happened." "Oh, he goes through my drawers too." And after a bit more talking, we formulated a plan. We were fairly sure Eric had plundered some pantsu, but we weren't sure where on his person it would be. Either way, we were both on the lookout for any oddities.
01/02/08(Wed)04:19:49 No.49750434

We returned downstairs, and Cheryl was back in her normal behavior acting like nothing ever happened. Gloria, having witnessed that last act of violence, should've made some remark. I was waiting for it... and waiting for it... and waiting. I shook my hand in front of her face a bit to see if she was even there. "You know, I don't like it when people wave their hands like that. It makes me just want to reach out and crush it." Ah, I felt refreshed. And then came emo Eric strutting along. I had a hunch that maybe if I tripped him, something would fall out of his pockets magically. I reached my foot out, but he saw it apparently and lifted his leg right over mine, giving me a little shit grin again. But then, as his pant leg went up slightly, I noticed something. Aha! Taking a page from the book of the masters, is he? I walked over to Melanie and whispered "the sock". She seemed to understand. So the night continued as it neared 12.
01/02/08(Wed)04:20:30 No.49750481

I waited for the perfect time, and I found it. Eric was in the kitchen, right by his parents, right in the middle of tons of people. I looked at Melanie and mouthed "go" to her. She looked at me a bit quizzically first, but then formulated something in her head it seems. "Say Eric, what's in your sock?" She just went right to the point. "Nothing, what are you talking about?" "Oh... I just saw a bunch in it. You sure there's nothing in there?" "Not that I'm aware of." I sniffed, and it smelled like nostalgia. That's my line Eric. "But I thought I saw..." and he lost his cool and snapped "There's nothing!" He's done for it now. Cynthia turned around. "Let us see Eric." Now, I imagine, from her point of view she was probably worried about it being drugs or something. She looked and the bunch was there. I was about to cum all over the place in anticipation. She pulled it out and it was... another sock? Yep, it wasn't pantsu, it was another sock. It was definitely a girl's though, and as I could tell it was Erika's. I could already tell things weren't going my way, but I refused to let this operation fail.
01/02/08(Wed)04:21:33 No.49750560

By now, everybody was looking at Eric, so I slipped into the background and tried to listen in at the same time. His drink was right on the counter. I gently opened the trash can. The vomit dip was there, and I reached in to get some. A bit gross, I know, but she is my daughter. Meanwhile, his parents asked him why he had her sock, and he said Melanie probably put in there as a joke. Since she was so blunt about it, and socks weren't as deeply incriminating as underwear, people believed him. They gave it back to me, and scolded Melanie, who wasn't pleased that this had backfired on her. People had disseminated themselves about the room as Eric and I passed each other. "Foot fetishist?" "Yeah" "This isn't over" "I think you lost." I smiled, because I didn't lose yet. He went over to take a victory drink, and instead he got a bit of vomitdip, which caused him to spit his drink out all over one of the neighbors. I've smited a fat chick, and emo Eric. I would have to thank Erika later. The woman turned around and gave him a swift smack in the face. "Now what's wrong with you?" said his father. "There's something in my drink." And he showed it to Jim. "Melanie, did you put something in his drink too?" "No." "I think you did, now straighten up or we're taking you home." Ah crap. Even though I did managed to give him a dosage of vomitdip, twice he did evade the ire of his parents. At that point I felt he had won the battle. Melanie was mad it me too for twice getting her in trouble.
01/02/08(Wed)04:23:16 No.49750677

But in the middle of this, Melinda called everyone over. It was 11:57. So the couples gathered up, and I realized I had nobody to gather up to. Erika was asleep upstairs, so I was alone. Melanie sat beside me though, which made me a bit uneasy. Things could get awkward if she tried to kiss me... yet at the same time... maybe I wouldn't mind... but no, that would be weird. But I, little Jake, sat there giggling a bit in my head at the propspect. It was 11:59, and we were watching one of those countdowns. People began counting. 10.... 9.... 8... she's looking at me... 7... 6... 5... well I could always laugh it off... 4... geeze 12 year olds look old these days... 3... 2... brace for loli-kiss impact... 1... aaaand I got my kiss. But wait, what the fuck? These aren't loli lips. The moistness of that lipstick, the cigarette breath... yep, it was Cheryl. "Haha, ya liked that didn't ya?" I started gagging slightly. Melanie, who apparently did try to kiss me, was laughing. Gloria was apparently trying to kiss Amelia (Jim's 6 year old daughter), who pushed her away. But as I was leaning over slightly gagging, I noticed something. A motherfucking ha! Emo Eric. I'll give him credit, he's a smart one. But not smart enough. In the back of his other sock, halfway into the heel of his shoe, another bulge. I thought immediately about exposing him, but then a feeling of benevolence struck me. I walked up behind him, and tapped his heel that housed the underwear with my foot. Whispering over his shoulder, "Achilles' heel? Put them back in the bathroom, and nobody gets hurt." He visibly jumped as I said this, and the next minute he suddenly felt the urge to piss.
01/02/08(Wed)04:24:32 No.49750768

Since new year's had passed, the party broke up rather quickly. Cheryl went home, but gave me a smack on the butt, and Eric too, which made him jump like a crazy paranoid fucker because he thought it was me. As he left, I made sure to mouth "I win." to him. I found the panties right where I told him to leave them. I went back into Erika's room, and returned them. Despite all the turmoil, she was still fast asleep. "Well I couldn't give you a kiss at 12, but I can now," said I as I plucked a kiss on her forehead. Looking down at her, I could tell 2008 was going to be good. And no, I didn't shit in Luke's mouth.


Thread 59
01/20/08(Sun)02:49:42 No.51451453

Hi there /b/, blindmuteloli guy here. I haven't updated since New Year's, because things have pretty much gone downhill again. Instead of brooding, I'll try to explain though. Last week, Jim invited Erika and I to a communion for Amelia (I'm not religious so I know nothing about this crap). It sounded pretty damn boring, but it was nice at the same time to be invited. It felt adult, like I was Mr. Jake instead of just Jake, getting invited to boring things for other parents' kids. And maybe we'd do other things like have boring cookouts or whatever in the future. It felt nice to be part of the community anyway. I wasn't part of his church so I didn't know if it would be okay for me to come, but he insisted. And of course I didn't refuse, so I asked Erika and she said it sounded fun (it wouldn't be, but things always sound fun to her). We didn't have anything planned for Sunday other than to jerk around anyway. Sunday came, and we went to the church he told us to arrive at. It was a nice, large place, not too big but not too shabby either. We took a seat, and the proceedings began. There was a large quilt thing, and the priest began with a service. It was a lot about da lawd and Jesus and faith and whatever. Then the kids all lined up and the priest presented some wine and some bread, the blood and the body of Christ as he claimed (I've always found it a bit creepy too, at least Muslims don't eat Muhammad). The priest drank some of the wine (of which the kids got none), and then he went down the line and stuffed a piece of bread in their mouths. Then there was some closing comments, and the whole thing was done. The kids, who had been forced to sit and watch a rather boring service for a while, and only for a piece of bread, were rather antsy as expected. There was a sort of after celebration and Erika, Amelia, and some other kids were running around. And really this is where the problem started. I should've been watching her more closely.
01/20/08(Sun)02:50:18 No.51451513

Outside the church are rather large cement steps that lead up to the door. Erika was running around with the other kids, and what apparently happened is she ran right off them. Normally she can sort of "sense" the change in the level of the floor before stairs come, and she knows her way around Melinda's house which has the stairs she uses most often so she doesn't normally have a problem with them. But she was running around and not paying attention, and fell right off them. And it's my fault. She acts so independent, I guess I just forgot she needs to be supervised. I let her run around a place she didn't know to well with a bunch of other kids and it was stupid. I'm a fucking idiot basically. This wasn't a nice fall though. These are large cement steps, and her head hit right on the edge of one of them. It was a nasty sight. One kid I didn't know just came running up to me flustered and told me to go to the stairs and there I saw her. Erika, spread out over a step. Her head was busted open, and she wasn't conscious. Now I'm starting to freak out (I try to keep my cool but I couldn't handle seeing her in all of this blood). Somebody dialed 911, and an ambulance arrived. I followed behind them, and I could barely focus on driving. I was guilty, and I still am. I wasn't watching her, but it was only for 30 seconds. But I should've been watching her. She's blind, how could I just let her run around? It's a dangerous area for her, any area could be a dangerous area for her.
01/20/08(Sun)02:51:15 No.51451592

I arrived at the hospital, and I asked for information on where I could find her. The lady pointed me in her general direction, but a worker there told me that I would have to wait before I could see her. So I sat down and waited, racked with guilt. Finally somebody came and informed that she was fine, but she was going to need a lot of stitches, and that she wasn't conscious yet. They told me that I should go home, and that if I come back the next day she'll probably be up and ready to leave, and that she would just need a bit for the stitches to heal. I was relieved when I heard this, and figured since I wouldn't get to talk to Erika anyway I might as well heed their advice. Melinda (who didn't go), was worried since I had arrived later than she expected. When she saw that I didn't have Erika with me, she knew something was wrong. I told her the situation, and she could tell I was remorseful about it. She tried consoling me, telling me it wasn't my fault, but I still felt like I was. I went up to my room and sulked around, and eventually went to sleep hoping everything would be fixed by tomorrow. Melinda and I both went to the hospital the next day, as she was just as worried as I was. They told me that Erika had regained consciousness in the middle of the night, but was sleeping now. Phew. I went into her room, and just watched her sleep for a bit. She was already all stitched up (but the head wound still looked pretty gross). Eventually she woke up, and I spoke to her.
01/20/08(Sun)02:51:51 No.51451642

"Hi Erika, how are you feeling?" I thought that maybe she could write a bit, but she shocked me when she said "Who are you?" She actually spoke it though, with her own voice, a frail one. Melinda and I were both shocked that she was talking. I wondered if it could have been because of the head trauma. "It's Jake." "Who?" She didn't remember me, Melinda, or anything. I asked the nurse, and she said that temporary amnesia was common among people who have significant trauma to the head, and that it would probably clear up in at most a week or so. I also asked her why Erika was suddenly talking, which seemed so surreal. She didn't know that Erika was normally mute, and asked me if I had ever seen a psychologist about it, which I did. He told me, as I recounted to you all earlier, that the muteness was some sort of psychological mechanism because of a traumatic experience, something like that. The nurse told me that the amnesia is probably related to it, and related to her forgetting that traumatic experience maybe, and that she might go back to not talking when she gets back her memory. So I spent a while explaining all that happened between us to her. She found it intensely interesting, but didn't seem like she felt too much like the "real" Erika in the story. Then she asked me about her real parents, and I had to explain that to her too. Melinda mostly sat in silence, she was uneasy about the whole situation. I was too, but was optimistic that it'd all resolve itself like they said. We eventually left the hospital for the day, and they told us Erika could leave tomorrow.
01/20/08(Sun)02:52:31 No.51451689

Coming home, I felt much more upbeat about everything. Erika was going to be fine, she just had an accident. Accidents happen, and they fix themselves. We went back to the hospital, and Erika was released to our care. She was still talking verbally, and still had no memory. Her voice is very pretty, very cute and feminine. We arrived at Melinda's house, and I made sure to put my arm around her to lead her around, but she shrugged me off. "What's wrong?" "Do you need to be so touchy?" "I just don't want you to have another accident, I don't think you remember the layout of this place." "I'm fine, you don't need to touch me." As she said that, she walked right into an endtable as the corner went right into her side. I grabbed hold of her again, but she flailed her arms around to push me off. I figured she was probably just irritable, I mean I would be too. She sat down on the couch, and I left her alone. The day pretty much continued with her not talking to me much. I was a bit down over it, I was hoping she'd be more peppy, but I know I shouldn't have expected her to be happy after what happened. The next day, it was time for her to get up to go to Jim's since I didn't want to miss two work days in a row. She was apprehensive to going though. Eventually after a bit of bickering, she said 'Why don't you make me go?' I was pretty much taken aback by this, because she had never really given me any attitude before. I didn't know how to handle it really. I couldn't let her stay home by herself, I couldn't have her walking all over me, but I couldn't yell at her. I just tried picking her up and thought I'd carry her though, mostly just joking, but she started banging on me like I was trying to kidnap her, so I put her down. I tried asking her specifically why she didn't want to go, but she didn't respond. I decided to give in, and call in sick. What else could I do?
01/20/08(Sun)02:53:46 No.51451788

Even though I was home, she didn't want much to do with me. We mostly sort of ignored each other, I made her food, but she didn't want to talk. I guess she was mad at me, but why shouldn't she be? The day came and went, with her showing no signs of regained memory. The next day, she once again refused to go to Jim's. If I missed another day of work, my boss was really going to be pissed. So I got strict. I dragged her to Jim's kicking and screaming. I felt bad about doing that to her, bad about leaving Jim with an angry Erika, and bad in general. I felt worse when I went back to Jim's in the evening and apparently Erika had tried to beat up Amelia, and was generally rude. The whole thing is shocking since Erika is always well behaved, Jim knows it too, he said he couldn't believe it. He told me that it's probably just a phase, and she's still welcome at his house. I scolded her over it, but she didn't say a word to me. She refused to speak at all to me. The next day, she told me she absolutely wasn't going, and there was nothing I could do about it. She told me that she'd kill me if I tried touching her. And I realized that something was severely wrong. This wasn't my Erika. This wasn't even Erika with amnesia, this was completely different. What happened to her brain? Some sort of chemical imbalance? She never acted so testy before. "Erika I'm sorry I had to be strict yesterday but--" She cut me off with, "You're not even my dad so just shutup!" And she ran away from me. It was hurt, to use an old expression, like somebody had stabbed me in the heart.
01/20/08(Sun)02:54:24 No.51451843

I didn't even call my boss, I just sat down on the couch. Tears were forming in my eyes, and I was trying not to just bust out crying. It was just a phase, I told myself anyway. I stayed home the entire day, and I didn't see her once. But I knew I couldn't leave things as they were. There had to be some reason. Maybe she was grieving over her parents, just now re-finding out that they're dead? I just didn't know what was up with her. But I was determined to talk to her. I went in her room, and asked her if I could speak to her a bit. She basically ignored me, but I started talking anyway. "Erika, I know you're going through a rough time right now, but I want to help. I'm not your real dad, but I really care about you. I've tried my best to care for you as long as we've been together, I really love you." I hugged her, and she once again was silent, not really accepting or rejecting my hug. Finally she said, "Well I don't love you. Leave me alone." That was the final straw. I couldn't take it. I left the room as quickly as possible and started crying. Yeah, I know, but that hurt. I'm actually a pretty sensitive person. Melinda saw me, and she gave me a hug and I basically cried on her like she was my mother. Eventually, after I was a bit better, Melinda went in to talk to Erika. I stayed there, just thinking about Erika. I couldn't give up on her, obviously. Then Melinda came out holding her eye. Apparently she tried to talk to Erika, and Erika got agitated and lunged at her, attacking her and apparently punching her eye a few times.
01/20/08(Sun)02:55:16 No.51451911

I was pissed, I went to go talk to Erika. "What are you doing punching Melinda!? She owns this whole house, she lets us both live here, what's your problem?" "I don't care what she does." I was fed up, so I sort of muttered under my breath, "ungrateful brat." She didn't talk kindly to this comment, and began making a long statement about how I thought I was such a good guy because I helped her out, and how I thought that she should just be my best friend forever, and only did it because I was selfish. This just enraged me, and I started screaming at her. "You're the fucking selfish one." Erika didn't expect this, as she sort of jumped back a bit. And I looked, and my fist was clenched, I was holding it slightly up, I needed to cool off. I knew who Erika must think I was acting exactly like. I punched a wall on my way out of the room, and Erika and I didn't talk for the rest of the night. Today's the same pretty much. We haven't talked. I scheduled an appointment with a doctor, because obviously she's not right. The amnesia was supposed be temporary, but it seems like it's last a lot longer. I'm trying to just keep in mind that it's not her fault, and I can't be mad at her. And I'm not really, I'm trying not to be. I love her, I'm going to resolve the issue.


Thread 60
01/26/08(Sat)00:13:37 No.52016899

Hey there /b/, Blindmuteloli guy is here, he's queer, get used to it. When I last left you all, I was pretty much at the end of my rope with Erika. She was lashing out violently against Melinda, and was becoming increasingly difficult to handle. The day after that incident though, she began acting differently. And I mean that in a good way. She wasn't totally back to herself, but she was more normal and at least not violent. She said that when I got stern with her after she suddenly started remembering things about me. Since then she's been recovering snippets of memories, usually more recent ones before least recent ones. As she's done this, she hasn't been less talkative than usual. It's nice to have her talking (and not talking back). It's also nice as she excitedly tells me a story she just remembered, it's fun to relive old things like that. I did tell her tons of stuff that happened between us when we were actually in the hospital, but she wasn't paying attention too much and hearing it can't compare to remembering the experience.
01/26/08(Sat)00:14:31 No.52016983

I also got a visit from a few well wishers who were concerned with Erika. The most surprising of which was Cheryl. When she visited, she didn't have her normal snake tongue. She was very somber, and concerned about Erika. As it turns out, she could sympathize with her condition. "Jake, my mom and a lot of my friends have had Alzheimer's. It's terrible when people you love don't remember who you are." Erika was shocked by her visit too, from the memories she's regained of Cheryl I imagine she didn't construct the depiction of a wholesome grandmother type figure. But I could tell she enjoyed it, as I did too. It was a very pleasant (though not as amusing, I must admit) visit. Gloria didn't come with, and I didn't even think I wanted to know where she would be.
01/26/08(Sat)00:15:02 No.52017035

Cheryl left, and Erika immediately said to me "There's something wrong with her." "Well, that's a given, but I guess this proves she has at least nice bone in her old body." "No, Jake. Something's wrong with her, she's sick." "You think so?" I didn't notice anything odd about her despite her demeanor, perhaps Erika was just expecting her to be more boisterous. Luke was another among the people to come visit. Erika took to him like he was a large teddy bear, and was all over him. I knew Luke was enjoying this (in more ways than he probably should), but it was fine. I knew he had really come out of genuine concern. Mark and Sharon also arrived during Luke's visit. Mark was antsy as if he had better places to be, and Sharon seemed pretty annoyed by him actually. I wondered how much longer their marriage was going to last. When Erika said hi, audibly as she has been, Mark had to add in another stupid Mark comment. "Hey look the midget can talk, she's not stupid after all." Now that one had really went too far, and I was about to be angry, when Luke got up and punched Mark right in the face. I didn't expect it, and neither did Mark. He just stood blankly as Luke approached him and then pow! Mark was about to kick Luke's ass (and I would've been with Luke had he tried), but Sharon separated them and hastily exited with Mark. The icing on the cake is that she said, "Well you deserved it." Luke started acting a bit embarrassed at his behavior, but I assured that it was awesome to see that punk get what he deserved. Erika was also excited. "You killed him! I could hear the punch!" Feeling a bit emasculated, I told her I was about to punch him too. "Not without your lamp," retorted Erika. A bit of awkward silence followed, Erika blissfully unaware (or perhaps mischievously the opposite) of bringing up a touchy subject. But we both started laughing about it. It seemed like ancient history.
01/26/08(Sat)00:18:38 No.52017324

Luke eventually left, and that was the end of visitors for the day. Jim's family had already had enough of Erika (though the next day they were pleasantly surprised with her improved behavior), so they never came. The next day, Erika seemed completely out of it. I imagine because she was remembering so much stuff. Surely you'd be in your own world too if your life story was flooding back to you. When she returned home from Jim's though, she seemed a bit depressed. I imagine that this had to do with her parents. I didn't want to intrude for a bit, but I finally asked her if something was bothering her. "Jake, is seeing nice?" "What do you mean?" "I can't see, am I missing tons of stuff?" "Well, there's lots of things to see. But there's lots of things to hear, smell, and touch too." I could tell that she was starting to get teary eyed, and all of the things she was remembering were weighing heavily on her mind. "I feel like I'm missing the whole world..." I began to hold her. "Don't worry, you're not missing anything. You're more perceptive than anybody else I've met." "I can't see you though." I put her hand on my face. "I'm not much of a looker." "Because I couldn't see I ended up hurting myself and acted crazy to you." "It's fine, we all act crazy sometimes." At this, she began crying. "I always make trouble for you." "No way. I love you." "You don't hate me?" "Of course not, I would never hate you. Why would you think that?" "That night you sounded so angry. You looked just like my dad when he used to hit me."
01/26/08(Sat)00:21:08 No.52017536

This was something I didn't know (though I had suspected). I knew he was an abusive asshole fuck to his wife, but I didn't know he hit Erika too. And of course being compared to him made me feel like a huge asshole. "I'd never do that. I would never ever hit you. I don't care how you acted, I wouldn't." "He used to be okay too." I began to wonder if I should pursue this further. If the "old" Erika never told me this, then she probably didn't want me to know. But I did. "What do you mean?" She didn't respond, and suddenly I realized what was happening. "C'mon now Erika, talk to me. Just like you've been doing for the past week." She looked like she was trying, and faint sounds were coming out but she wasn't forming any words. I could only imagine bad memories were running through her head. Just complete darkness, as your dad beats you, and you can't even see him. I was tearing up too, because I really was happy that she was talking and that it meant that she wasn't feeling this perpetual sadness that I always sensed she had. She's always seemed and acted happy, but I've also always felt she's constantly bothered by her past, and will take a while to get over to it. I didn't want her to go back to that. I carried her up to her room, and held her until she fell asleep. I ended up cancelling that doctor's appointment too, she did recover her memories, so I probably jumped the gun. I suppose it takes some people longer after head trauma.
01/26/08(Sat)00:21:54 No.52017609

The next day, she was talking a bit, but only in laconic, quiet phrases. I could tell she was having difficulties forming words, and used her notebook to communicate. I guess a very powerful memory was triggering this response, but I didn't know what it was. She did reveal to me another bit of information, saying her dad turned weird after he started taking pills. Which I guess means he was on some sort of medication, or perhaps using illegal drugs. Since then, it's been much of the same. Luke's been stopping be more often, which I don't mind. If Erika likes his visits, it's fine with me. She's doing better either way though, I'm relieved. Another week of what occured in the last would've killed me.
Thread 61
01/29/08(Tue)01:27:53 No.52317704

Hello there /b/, blindmuteloli here again. Things have continued to quiet down a bit, well except for a little "visit" I got yesterday. But first, I'm a little bit annoyed about something. I was hanging out with Luke the other day, and asking him about his love geezer Cheryl. He suddenly got a bit depressed, so I asked him if anything was wrong. He said nothing, but I don't believe it. She has some sort of problem, and nobody wants to tell me? Yeah, I'm nosy as usual. Even when it's not my business I still want to know about it. Anyway, what really happened today is there came a rapping at my chamber door. I opened it up and 'twas a whore, nothing more. No that's actually mean, it was my little sister! And guess what else!? She's pregnant! Happy day. Now, you might ask, how did this come about? And this story she did relay to me as we sat down and talked. The story goes like this. She got pregnant, she doesn't know by who (yeah, I know, that's a bad sign), my parents kicked her out of the house. So she took what she had and somehow ended up here. Wonderful. "What about Amelia (my older sister, not Jim's daughter)?" "Her place is way too far. Besides, you'll let me stay here, won't you?" Now I know what you're all thinking. "Of course Jake will!" But no, Jake won't. I made up my mind right then that she's not staying here. Not my problem to fix. Before I kicked her ass out the door though, I wanted to get a bit more info out of her. "So, what are you planning on doing?" "Well, that's where you come in!" "What do you mean?" "I need money for an abortion." "...You're joking, right?" "What?" "I've got to clothe, feed, and shelter a little girl and you want me to give you money so you can kill that demon spawn fermenting in your womb?" "Melinda's rich, isn't she? This house is big. Don't be an asshole." "Melinda inherited this actually, but even still if she had money it's not mine to give nor yours to receive."
01/29/08(Tue)01:28:31 No.52317759

"What are you trying to say then?" "Get out?" "You're kidding?" "No." "You won't let me stay even?" "No." "Why not!?" "Because this is your own fuckup I've got my own problems, jesus." Is she fucking ridiculous? I made sure to remember all of the stupid shit coming out of her mouth so I could laugh at it after I was done being pissed off. She then tried to switch strategies. She seemed rather shocked that swindling me out of a couple hundred bucks for an abortion was going to be harder than she thought. Apparently people think I'm the good natured village idiot. She settled down right in my lap, and tried to make a cute little face for me. When unexpectedly, I pushed her off, yelled "SHORYUKEN" and dragon punched her right in the stomach. Then my partner Cyclops jumped in and laser'd her ass straight out the door and to the nearest family planning clinic. Man X-men vs. Street Fighter was a great game. On my copy the music always skipped though. But that's besides the point. In actuality, I considered succumbing to this deceptively erotic tactic. But then I realized her VAGINA probably looks like something drawn by Walt Uziga. I kicked her out. I got up, dragged her by her arm as she resisted. "Jake, c'mon just one day..." "No. Out!" "Ja--" "OUT!" and I closed the door right in her face. Does it make me an asshole? Maybe. But for once I wasn't going to let other people drag me down. Erika, who was upstairs and had heard the commotion, came down to ask who was talking to me. I told her it was someone that would never cause me any problems again.
01/29/08(Tue)01:29:35 No.52317847

On a side note, Erika's still been talking a bit. She isn't as much, and likes to carry her notebook around again. I encourage her to talk though as much as possible. But back to what happened yesterday. I'm not a completely mean guy, and I thought I'd try to call up my parents and make a case for my sister. "Don't worry Jake, we're just teaching her a lesson." "A lesson that could involve her ending up dead? She's not old enough to be wandering around. That's what got her in trouble in the first place." "Wandering around?" "Well yeah, you did kick her out." "She isn't at your place?" "No..." "Why the hell not!?" "What do you mean?" "Didn't she come to your place?" "Yeah. I told her to leave." "You did WHAT?" "Eh?" "How could you be that stupid?" "You let your daughter get knocked up and I'm the stupid one? Well okay then." And I hung up. At least my daughter is still a virgin. The next day (today), I went to work. La ti da, going around, doing some shit, messing around, masturbating, masturbating in the food, masturbating in the coffee machine, masturbating in the soap dispenser, masturbating on the tree outside, masturbating on the ceiling. My sister approaches! Looks like trouble! Well, perhaps she was coming in to eat. So I treated her like a normal customer, even using one of my boss's reccommended "funny lines". Our boss has this idea that instead of saying the usual "May I take your order" we should try to add "humor" into it. So I used his brilliant line he thought up himself as she was in front of the counter. "Ho-la, would you like a co-la? (we don't even serve mexican food, not anymore anyway)" She burst into tears. Lord, it wasn't that bad. She was wailing like a banshee, and I realized she was faking it to try and make a scene.
01/29/08(Tue)01:30:31 No.52317925

My boss, who was in the other room working on something or other, came out. "Is there a problem ma'am?" "He got me pregnant and now he's trying to leave me..." and she trailed off into unintelligible blather. "Jake, is this true!?" "She's my little sister!" He looked at me with a shocked expression, and it occured to me that I didn't add proper context to that statement. "Jake, I'm going to go into the other room and let you handle this..." I had a few words with my sister. "What the hell is your problem?" At this point, another customer, a husky negroid woman, had walked in and was growing impatient before she reached the counter. "Escuz me, can I gessum service?" "I'll be with you in one moment ma'am." My sister began playing her little game again. I tried to quiet her, but the customer overheard and had to intervene. "Is dey a problem?" "No, it's family issues." "She sayin' ya got he' pregnant!" "I didn't!" "You nee' to step up and be a man!" My sister interrupts with her false sobbing routine again. "He raped me..." OH FUCK NO. I take back every nice thing (if I've said nice things) about this bitch. The woman was indignant at this statement, and told my sister to come with her and they'd get away from me. I tried to follow them but the woman slapped me in the face. They walked out. I was left there looking like an idiot. My boss accosted me. "Jake, take the rest of the day off." "Really, why?" "Juuust... just take it." "Okay." I left, and went home. Jim wasn't expecting me for a while, so I just decided to leave Erika there for a bit. And then I heard another knocking on my door. "Are you Jake?"
01/29/08(Tue)01:31:26 No.52318000

"Yes." "Hi I'm with the (county) Police Department. Would you like to come down to the station with me?" "Uh, not really." "C'mon, don't worry, I won't arrest you, let's just have a talk down at the station." And so off we went. I could already tell this had something to do with my sister, and I wasn't going to be happy. I was seated in a little room, like they would use for interrogations (and probably did). He asked me if I knew my sister, and I told him I did. I was about to continue to explain the story but he cut me off. I began to think that I had some sort of right to not talk, but since they didn't actually arrest I guess they didn't apply. I guess that also meant I didn't really have to be there, but oh well. Luckily, before too long another person came in and informed the person talking to me that my sister revealed she made it all up. Thank da lawd, I didn't know how far she wanted to take this. They released her to my care. I was about rip her throat out, and probably should've, but I tried to contain myself. Which was hard, because I was pissed. She thought we were driving back to Melinda's place, but we weren't. I was driving to my parents' house. The ride was long and very silent, as she could tell I didn't find this as funny as she did. We arrived, and my parents weren't home. I wasn't leaving though, I wanted to make sure she was in that house. By this time I checked my watch and realized I probably wasn't going to make it back in time for RAW. Yeah, yeah wrestling I know but I wanted to see the franchise boy I'm shining now (and by that I mean see him get injured).
01/29/08(Tue)01:32:36 No.52318109

So I grabbed a bat from a little shed we have in our backyard, and busted the window open. Some say I have anger management problems, some say I'm far too placid. She went in through it, and I told her not to talk to me for at least a year. I freaked her out too, so she knows Jake isn't to be fucked with. And maybe a neighbor will hear the window break and call the police, so she can get a taste of them. I left my parents a little note too. "Consider the money to fix the window her rent for staying at Hotel Jake." I'll probably end up paying them for it anyway (I'll admit it was stupid to break it), but I wasn't too happy with them either trying to pawn her off on me so I'll anger them a bit. I drove home, and Jim was worried since I had arrived much later than he expected. I told him that I had solved the problem, and there was nothing to worry about. Erika and I returned home, to see about a quarter of wrasslin'. Problem averted for now, but it's not probably not the last I'll hear of it. And my parents are going to be really pissed about that window. That was veeery stupid. I need to learn to count the prime numbers.


Thread 62
02/10/08(Sun)02:56:14 No.53490566

Herro /b/, blindmuteloli hombre is here to rape your white women. Well anyway, speaking of white women, I guess I'll get into the thread. The white woman is Cheryl, and she has lung cancer. Luke finally told me. It's in the early stages, and possibly treatable, but it doesn't surprise me. She's an old woman who's been smoking for however many years. Her voice has always sounded raspy, I pretty much predicted it but just wanted some confirmation. Cheryl, always being herself though, uses her affliction to manipulate hapless Luke. Apparently she's been running him ragged as sort of a personal slave, sending him on various errands. And of course, how can he refuse? She's a fragile old cancerous lady.
02/10/08(Sun)02:56:49 No.53490629

He decided to try to pawn one of these chores off on me. And how could I refuse? He's the selfless servant doing his best for a cancerous old woman! He wanted to me to go grocery shopping for her, and pick up some cigarettes. Since I had nothing better to do that evening, why not? I took Erika along with me, since I thought it might be fun for her to take a little field trip to the grocery store. We were going about, buying this and that was on the list, and then the trip took a turn for the worst. Picking out some items in the same aisle as us was none other than Ryan. Yes, asshole Ryan, child beater Ryan, that Ryan. I saw him, and walked away. I was going to just ignore him. He gave me a smug look when I saw him though. And then he began stalking me around the store. Not following behind me, but positioning himself so in the various aisles we would pass each other, and he'd give me a smug look. This happened over and over. I just wanted to get what Cheryl wanted me to and leave. Erika didn't notice his presence, because he didn't say a word, and I didn't want her to. But every so often he opened his mouth slightly like he was about to say "Hello Erika", just to taunt me. That's all he wanted to do was taunt me. "Haha Jake, thought you got me? Nothing happened to me. I'm fine."
02/10/08(Sun)02:57:24 No.53490685

Eventually, I couldn't avoid it. "What do you want?" "I'm shopping Jake. Making dinner for my Sarah tonight." Sarah was his girlfriend, the same one that he hit too and he had when he adopted Erika briefly. She went back to him I guess. Once again, he only said that just to get at me. "Oh Jake, that Sarah you tried to save. She went right back to me." (by the way he didn't actually say this or the other statement, I'm just surmising on his motives) I didn't really care about Sarah though. Erika, who had heard the name Ryan was acting defensive, I could tell she was prepared to hunch down and put her hands over her head. I put my arm around her to reassure her. Obviously, he couldn't do a damn thing in a public store, except harass me which is what he was doing. "Why are you following us then?" He ignored my question. "You know Jake, don't be mad. I'm a changed man. They made me take anger management courses, parenting courses, all of that. I'm even eligible to readopt Erika, of course I can't since you already did. But if you ever die, she'll be in good hands." And then he laughed. I couldn't take his shit anymore. I punched him, and apparently pretty damn hard because he fell backwards into a display and knocked it over. I wasn't done though. I jumped on him, and began punching him more. And he deserves it. He wants to beat a fucking little girl? And he has the audacity to taunt me over it? Then I'm going to give it back to him 10 times worse.
2/10/08(Sun)02:58:19 No.53490776

Most people around me saw I was kicking serious amounts of ass, like Kamina amounts of ass, so they all stayed away. Some employees finally rushed in to get me off of him, but I resisted. I eventually gave in though, I didn't want to bash in some pasty grocery store working teen's face just because I hated Ryan. Erika was freaked out by the experience, initially thinking Ryan had attacked me. I waited until the police arrived. They got both of our sides of the story, not really caring when I told them the reason why I wanted to kill Ryan. In the end, as expected, they brought me in. Also, one of the cops recognized me. "For a guy who's supposed to be a dad you get in a lot of trouble." Certainly made me feel like shit. And it was probably true. I let my emotions get the best of me. Ryan AGAIN gave me that smug look as I was being taken away. Even still, he had blood coming out of his nose as he did. It made me feel slightly better. They also took Erika away, to drive her to Melinda's house, as I found out later (at the time I was worried about what they would do with her).
02/10/08(Sun)03:00:14 No.53490960

Another night in jail, and it was pretty much the same. It was embarrassing to be recognized by one of the officers though. Melinda came to pick me up, and she was visibly annoyed that she was doing it again. I told her about what happened, thinking it'd turn her to my favor, but it didn't. "You're just stupid, Jake. You're always acting stupidly. You need to grow up." Speaking of stupid actions, let's discuss that window. I got a call from my parents about it the other day. Apparently my manly way of taking charge didn't resonate with them. "You're going to fucking pay me back every last fucking penny, understand me? And if you don't I'll drive down to your little girlfriend's house and knock some goddamn sense into you!" So I put on a clip of Shana saying "Urusai, urusai, urusai!". You all know this is where I say I actually didn't, but it would've been a good idea. Or I could've just presented him with boring high school drama scenes lacking real action hyping up to an enemy which shows up and does barely any damage then disappears (of course she did leave an incredibly annoying character with a means of instant suicide, which is nice)... wait, where was I going with this statement? Sorry, you have to get the anime rants with the blindmuteloli. That's what happened. I hope I don't see any more of Ryan. As for Cheryl, I never ended up getting her groceries or cigarettes. In response to this, she told me this statement: "When I'm in hell beating the shit out of my fuckhead ex-husband, I'm going to pretend it's your face on his body!" It's always nice to be appreciated.
Thread 63
02/13/08(Wed)00:32:03 No.53898593

Attention K-mart shoppers. This Gendou speaking. All female personnel please report to my office for... breast inspection. No this actually Jake, the blindmuteloli man speaking. It's time for another thread, as you can probably surmise. Today I was sick (legitimately), and I had to stay home from work. My boss didn't care much (he may be starting to realize that I get paid to do a lot of nothing). Since I was feeling so badly, Erika was determined to stay and care for me. Did this work out? ...Eh, not so much. Her first act of kindness was to make me some soup. Obviously, having her in the kitchen by herself dealing with stoves and what not was a bad idea. I was about to stop her, when I began to feel like I was going to vomit everywhere. I rushed to the bathroom, and just did that. When I came back, Erika was actually holding a bowl on a plate. How in the HFIL could she prepare soup so quickly, and really at all? I sat on the couch, and she handed me a fork, a knife, and a spoon (and by handed I mean almost gouged my eyes out with it, she lacks depth perception so it wasn't her fault). "Why do I need a knife or a fork for soup?" "Restaurants do it!" I took a taste of it. It tasted a bit funny, until I realized it wasn't soup. It was water. It was water in a bowl. And I bluntly told her this. "Erika, this is just water in a bowl." "It's unfinished! I was just seeing how you liked the first part. Don't be ungrateful!" She gave me underlined exclamation points, which I had been missing for a while. Before she decided to go finish her soup though I decided to go in and make us both some real soup.
02/13/08(Wed)00:32:33 No.53898663

It was Campbell's chunky chicken noodle, and I was reminded of all of those husky nigra athletes from the commercials. I think those NFL sized appetites would rape me and give me an NFL sized asshole. Erika didn't want any because I sneezed in it a few times while making it. Erika went to the bathroom, and I had a little "happy time" in the living room to cure me of the ruttishness my sickness causes. She came back out, and sat down on my legs. Before long I went into a sneezing fit so she grabbed a tissue and put it up to my nose. But I felt something that suggested these had already been used. And then I sniffed it. I knew that smell, it smelled like raw meat. And then it hit me. Since the tissues were already there I used them to clean up my "mess" and threw them right next to the tissue box. Erika wouldn't let met escape from a noseful of my own semen though before I blew, and I blew. There was still some 'miracle whip' left on the tip, which I promptly wiped off. Erika continued "blow"-ing me (you know I had to make a pun out of that) for the rest of the day.
02/13/08(Wed)00:33:09 No.53898744

Then a knock at the door. The last person I needed to see while sick stood before me. None other than Cheryl. I could tell she was in her normal mood. Don't know what got her out of her cancer depression slump, but she seemed pretty much like her self. "Uh hi Cheryl. What brings you over here?" "Looking for pudgy. He's been trying to blow me off recently." "Oh really? That's a shame." "What about you cumstain?" I looked down, and realized there was a rather obvious stain on my pants. Guess I didn't wipe it all off. "Shouldn't you be at work? Or is ching chong over there gonna do like all of the other gooks and start eating dogs?" "I'm sick today. What about you? Shouldn't you be at a hospital, getting chemotherapy or something?" "I don't want no goddamn chemotherapy. Makes you balder than pudgy's dick." "May I ask then what's brought you back into our lives as the cheery bringer of joy we all knew and loved?" "I don't got much longer to live. So I'm going to be the biggest bitch anyone's ever seen while I'm still moving." "That's not much of a change from the usual..." "I want to call that Make-a-wish foundation and make a wish that you'd shut the fuck up." I imagine she's been saving that one up. "Well anyway, Luke isn't here. So... bye." Without notice she smacked me with the cane. Hard. "What the fuck was that for!?" "Just because I can. You can't hit a cancerous old woman back. Am I a bitch now?"
02/13/08(Wed)00:33:44 No.53898825

She's not even a bitch anymore, she's crazy. Speaking of crazy, I wasn't even getting off that easy. Cheryl had Gloria waiting in the car, who wanted to visit too. She came in, and we sat down and chatted a bit. "Ching chong", as Cheryl put it, was pouting that two vulgar old women had interrupted help sick Jake time. "You know Jake, I know a wonderful homemade cure for any illness." "Really? What is it?" She leaned in close to my ear and whispered "It's called cyanide." And then she started laughing it up. I set myself up for that one. I wonder sometimes if she's just plain crazy, old mind going away crazy, or just Cheryl-brand mean in a more subtle way. Cheryl eventually suggested that we play a game. I personally was fine with just sitting there, I hadn't ordered two old ladies to interrupt my day. What were we going to play? We were thinking about it when we got an interruption from somebody. None other than Luke himself. He saw Cheryl, and that deer in the headlights look kicked in again. "So there you are, huh pudgy?" Innocent Luke had come over for some anime discussion, some video games, some usual nerd bonding stuff. And this is what he gets. Luke went up to me. "Jake... can you go to the kitchen with me... to talk about anime?" Obviously we weren't talking about anime, but Cheryl gave no protest as we hurried off to the other room. When I looked at her though, she licked her lips. A fast lick, like a snake about to swallow the rat whole. One of the creepiest things I've ever seen in my life. "Jake, you've got to help me. That woman is a nympho!"
02/13/08(Wed)00:34:17 No.53898904

"It's not my fault you like to raid both the cradle and the cemetary Luke." "Jake, I'll confess something. You know Cheryl is the landlord for my apartment building right?" "Yeaah..." When it involves Cheryl, it's bound to be insane. "She threatened to evict me unless I moved in with her. And I did, and it's been like that for the past few weeks." "Wait a second. That's gotta be an illegal business practice!" "Try telling that to her cane." "Either way, I'm there and she's a nympho and I can't take anymore!" He sounded like a housewife in a domestic abuse situation. "You think cancer would slow her down Jake, but no. Day and night. And even you don't want to know how kinky she can get sometimes." "If this is really driving you crazy, what do you want me to do about it?" "Let me move back in here." Uh-oh. "I don't know if that's a good idea..." "Why not?" "Well you remember what happened the times before." A lamp on a pole match, that's what. "Oh, that's ancient history!" "Well you know I couldn't say yes without asking Melinda. And even if she is a nympho, wouldn't you feel bad abandoning a lonely old woman who's about to die?" "I keep on hearing that, it's annoying!" We went back out, and Cheryl was waiting. "It's time to go home pudgy. Tell your little friends goodbye." With that, they were off. But something wasn't right. Cheryl had left, so the winds should have settled and the crows should've stopped chirping. Wait a second! Gloria was still on my couch. Why was Gloria still on my couch!? "Gloria, why are you still here?" "I still want to play the game." "I am the game and you don't want to play me. I am control, no way you can change me." Well I didn't actually say that, but it would have been a nice opportunity.
02/13/08(Wed)00:34:58 No.53899008

Melinda had the car, so there was no way to make her leave for now. We loitered arond a bit, until finally Melinda returned. "Jake you got some mail!" Meru meru for me? Wonderful! No wait. Not wonderful. Ryan has charged me with assault. I have to show up at court. So he decided to press some charges after all then. Surely if I explain the situation though, they'll be able to understand that Ryan is a scumbag. I haven't told Erika, and I may not, since I'm sure I'll resolve it all quickly.
Thread 64
02/17/08(Sun)01:57:40 No.54481878

( ยด?`) Hello, kids! Happy Valentine's Day (or SAD if you're one of those hipsters who like to wear the shirts with the satirical slogans on them). What you say? I'm late!? Valentine's Day is over!? Yes, actually it is, and I'm late. But then again I haven't introduced myself. I shall only say that this is the blindmuteloli chap and you're here for Jake's late Valentines Day-travaganza party head cha la thread. SPARKINGU! Okay, that's quite a nonsensical opening, but we'll go with it. But yeah, this is basically the thread of how my VD (not venereal disease) went. I thought more stuff might happen later so I put off updating for a bit, but it seems that what happened has just been swept under the rug. What happened you might ask? Well I imagine I'll tell you. A quiet morning it was, usual business. It may have been the day of romance but some people still had to go to work. Jim, oddly enough, was busy that day and in fact asked me to watch his kids as well as mine. Of course I couldn't, so I had to rely on Luke to take care of all three of them. Leaving Luke home alone with 3 young girls probably isn't the best idea, but I had to go. He had trouble getting away from Cheryl, but I told him that if this day went well he might look better in the eyes of Melinda, who he was going to ask today to move in with.
02/17/08(Sun)01:58:45 No.54482017

I went to work, and our always clever boss came up with a couple's discount on all people who came into the store with their wives/girlfriends/etc. The only person I actually got was a guy who came in with his little sister. I gave him the discount just to be funny, thinking he'd have a laugh. When I told him though, he started to walk away but then turned to me and winked. Other than that, it was an average day at an average job. I arrived home, intending to go pretty quickly to Sharon's house. I wanted to get some legal advice from her on the whole Ryan situation, and she's the only person even remotely versed in those types of things that I know of. I came home, and found a terrible site. It was Luke, pants and boxers pulled down, his gluttonous masses he calls thighs spread out like some sickly cookie dough on my couch cushion, pumping his painfully inadequate PENIS with panties over his face. "Luke, what the fuck!?" He was started by this, fell foward off the couch smacking his dick into the table, and then squirmed to pull his pants up on the ground. I grabbed the panties from him, but quickly realized these weren't loli panties. I sniffed them, and they smelled like tobacco. "Oh lord..." and I realized who they belonged to. "Where are the kids Luke?" "Upstairs..." "What if they would've waked down the stairs? Can't you be more responsible?" "I..." "Why do you have these anyway?" "Cheryl wanted me to take them!" "Luke, this really makes me reconsider you wanting to move in." "What, why? Don't act like you don't masturbate!" "Well... this isn't about me!" From all the commotion, the kids came downstairs and asked what was going on. "We're talking about masturbation and it's not for kids so go back upstairs!" I then realized that this probably wasn't a good statement to make. They saw that it wasn't the time though, so they hurried back up. I could only imagine as it led to Erika asking Melanie what masturbation was, and things going from there.
02/17/08(Sun)01:59:58 No.54482169

Anyway, Luke stayed where he was since Melinda should be home soon, and put the panties back in his pocket. I went upstairs to check on the children. Erika presented me with a Valentine she made. Being as she's blind, it wasn't the prettiest, but it had good writing. Actually, it sort of looked like a decapitated chicken. "Do you like it?" "I love it." Melanie made me one too. It was a normal looking heart shaped one. Unfolding it, it said "Fuck me." "Do you like it?" "It's... ribald." "What does ribald mean?" "You're precocious, you should know." "What does precocious mean!?" And then I looked at Amelia. She stared at me for a bit, before finally saying "What?" "Didn't you make me anything?" "Why would I?" "I'm a popular guy." "You need to shower." I probably did. I went back downstairs, prepared to leave for Sharon's. I told Luke that there would be no funny play or foreplay while I was gone. I arrived at Sharon's house, and knocked on the door. No answer. It was somewhat left open though, seems she forgot to close it all the way, so I walked right in. And now for a lesson on why we don't do that. There they were. Jim. Sharon. Playing old maid. I sat down to play with them, and I realized it wasn't old maid. They were playing Super Smash Brothers Brawl. Already horrified at how they managed to get a pre-release copy, I picked up a controller only to realize they weren't playing at all. They were watching Home and Garden Television. I sat down to watch Trading Spaces when it occured to me that they were actually having sex. Okay, I dragged that out, but they were fucking. They both shot up immediately when they saw me and rushed to cover themselves.
02/17/08(Sun)02:00:31 No.54482246

"What are you guys doing!?" "Uh well... Jake..." Jim began to speak. "It's just a little adulteroo." "Jim, did you just say 'adulteroo'!? It's adultery, you're both married! What's wrong with you both? And on Valentine's day?" "Mark didn't give a shit about me or Valentine's day Jake. You were right about him. He's a fucking dick. Since we've been married he's always been a dick and I'm tired of him. I wouldn't mind a nicer guy like Jim." "You always said he was annoying..." "Well, he is annoying. But at least he doesn't treat you like an asshole." I imagined the scenario. Sharon looked for a shoulder to cry on, went to her old neighbor Jim, and Jim turned that into some action. "What about your wife Jim?" "She cares more about her job than me! We were both spending Valentine's alone so we just got together... and, things happened." "You shouldn't be doing this. You can do it, but not behind people's backs. You should tell them both upfront." "You won't tell them, will you Jake?" "It's none of my business, I came here to talk to Sharon." "Can I get some clothes on first?" "Fine." Jim left in shame, and Sharon got dressed to talk to me. "What do you want?" "I want some legal advice. Ryan's pressing charges against me for assault." "Did you hit him?" "Well yeah." "Then that's assault." "C'mon now, give me some good advice." "it's not really my area of law, besides you just sort of caught me here so I'm a bit shooken up. Can't we do this another day?" "Okay fine, I'll go home now. But I have a court date soon, so I need some advice." I was about to leave, when Sharon stopped me again. "Jake, you don't think Jim and I are bad people, do you?" "Well no, but you should tell them if you want to end your relationship." "Jim has kids though, he can't do it." "I won't judge either of you. Hell, it's none of my business, let's just not bring it up ever again, okay?" With that, I went home.
02/17/08(Sun)02:01:08 No.54482327

I returned home to find that Jim had already picked up Melanie and Amelia. On the doorstep, I saw Melinda's car pulling up. I went inside, and warned Luke, who was lazing about. Melinda came in, and Luke dropped the question. "Melinda, can I move in?" I expected her to take some time to think about, it but instead she smacked him. "Why did you do that!?" "You expect me to let you move in!? After you cheat on me with Jake's whore sister!?" "You cheated on me with Jake!" I interjected with, "Hey, I'm not in this, and neither is my who--er... sister." "Either way, I don't care. He's not moving in." "I thought you guys made up." "We did, and it's fine if he wants to come over and play every now and then. But he's not living here. I would go crazy." "Well fine then, I didn't want to live with you anyway! Bitch!" and he waddled out. I didn't expect tension to erupt so quickly, and as quickly it turned on me. "This is your fault! You put that idea in his head, didn't you Jake?" "I told him to ask, but..." "This isn't your house, don't invite people to live here!" Well dayumn. I went upstairs to see Erika. She seemed to be pondering something. "Is it true it shoots white poison?" "Eh... what?" "Your PENIS."
Thread 65
02/27/08(Wed)00:19:27 No.55894761

Good morrow to you /b/. The blindmuteloli man is here again, same blindmute time, same blindmute channel. Woke up today, went to work as I usually do. The phone rang, so I answered it, expecting a delivery. Instead it was Sharon. "Is this Jake?" "Uh yes, who is this?" "Sharon." "I'm guessing you're not planning on ordering any of our fine food?" "Jake, an emergency has happened. I need you to come to Jim's house." "What ha--", but she already hung up on me. She seemed pretty frantic, so I was guessing that this was an actual emergency and not just one of her usual "get Jake involved in your business" emergencies. Furthermore, my precious and wonderful Erika was staying with Jim as usual, meaning it could be bad. Luke is moving in today, which means I intended on having him babysit more often, but not today. About that, I did get Melinda to let Luke move in. It was pretty simple, I worked my Jake magic over the course of the past week or so. By "Jake magic" I mean generally incessant reminders about Luke, until she was finally so annoyed she had to give in. She wasn't happy about it, but I brought Erika in for cuteness backup. Erika herself though was suprisingly apprehensive to Luke moving in. "Why don't you like the idea?" "I need my underwear." I managed to enlist her help in the matter though, and we won Melinda over. Cheryl obviously isn't be happy about it, but Luke said he was basically is planning a stealth escape. He said he's going to somehow get her drunk or sleeping or something and just leave and hope she doesn't wake up. It's kind of mean, but I don't think he has any other chance of leaving. Of course that also meant he could just bring the wrath of Cheryl down on my abode.
02/27/08(Wed)00:21:30 No.55895022

Back to the emergency then. I told my boss that I had to leave, something had happened. "Something always happens with you, doesn't it Jake?" "I'm sorry." "Don't be, parenting is great isn't it?" "Yeah, how's your son doing?" He gave me a look like I said something I shouldn't have and I rushed off. I arrived to find that this was, in fact, an emergency. There was a police car there, talking to Sharon. "Sharon! What happened? Where's Erika?" Sharon approached me. "Well Jake, I followed your advice..." Oh god, she was already implicating me in this. "...and I told Mark about my relationship with Jim." "...And?" "He came here and beat the shit out of Jim. Badly. An ambulance came to take Jim away, which is why I called you." "Was anybody else hurt?" "Eric got socked in the face by Mark. They offered to take him to the ER, but he said he was okay. I'm going to go meet Jim at the hospital. Mark's already been arrested. I need you to go watch the kids. And, well..." "Yes...?" "Jim's wife might be coming home at any time. I need you to..." "Clean up and cover up?" "Well yeah." "Why should I do this for you?" At that point she got legitimately mad at me. "Jake, Jim's already had the crap kicked out of him. His kids are in there crying, do you want to cause more trouble for Jim and them just because you want to be a smug fucker?" I was a bit flabbergasted by that. "I was only kidding, I'll do it. Eventually you know though, the truth will have to come out." "It's shit like that that got us into this mess in the first place. Now goodbye." I went inside, and the house was trashed. Stuff thrown about everywhere, broken glass and some blood stains. Amelia was bawling her eyes out, Melanie was trying not to cry and console her little sister, Erika was shook up by the whole affair, and Eric sat there holding his eye. "You okay?" "Do I look like I'm okay?" He lifted his hand, I saw he had a pretty nasty bruise. Mark had got him good. 3/4ths of me was sympathetic, but there was that small part that went "hehe, emo kid got beat up." According to what I learned later, he tried to pull Mark off of his dad only to get a punch right in the face for his efforts.
02/27/08(Wed)00:22:55 No.55895181

I went to console the girls. Amelia and Erika both went right into my arms as I asked Melanie more about what happened. "He came in and went crazy. I called the police." I knew that I couldn't laze around for long though. I went to work busy as a bee cleaning. Some stuff was broken beyond repair, but I did my best. I calmed the kids down too to make sure that they weren't going to give things away. It looked generally okay when I was finished with it, and I waited. Cynthia finally did come home. "Oh, hi Jake. What brings you here? Where's Jim?" "Well, Jim asked me to come babysit for him here while he's out." I could tell Cynthia's bullshit detector was already going off. She knows her husband never goes out. "What's he doing?" "Going to buy some... beer." It seemed like the most logical thing. "What car did he take?" "He walked." This was not going well. "He asked you over to babysit solely so he could walk to go get some beer?" "Well, I don't mind." And then suddenly her look of "this is bullshit" turned to a smirk. "Tell me the truth Jake." "Uuh...." "I knew it!" Oh fuck. I had failed. "He's going to buy me a birthday present, and he asked you to come over here and babysit and told you to make up an excuse, right? Wow, that's amazing! He usually forgets it. You know Jake, people sometimes ask me why I'm with Jim. He has his bad points, but he can do amazing stuff at times. He's a lump, but he's a sweet lump." My mouth was about to drop wide open that she had come to the conclusion, but I knew that I had to keep my lips sealed. I began shaking my finger mockingly. "You got me!" "Don't worry Jake, I won't tell that I know. Do you have any idea what he's buying?" "I haven't a clue." I suddenly began to realize the stupidity of this whole scheme. What exactly is Cynthia going to think when Jim doesn't return home tonight, or for a few days (depending on the length of his hospital stay). And how are his kids going to keep silent? Why am I involving myself in such a stupid idea? She also saw that Eric had quite a large bruise. "Eric, what happened to you?" Uh-oh, emo boy on the spot. "I... fell down the steps." "Oh, are you okay?" "Yep." Oh man, she's really a lot more gullible than I imagined.
02/27/08(Wed)00:25:57 No.55895565

Eventually, Erika and I left. We returned home, and I could sense a demonic presence in the air. There she was. On my couch. Cheryl. "Where is he?" "Cheryl, how did you get inside?" "WHERE IS HE?" Cheryl was now bordering on unfunny, she was REALLY bordering on unfunny. "Cheryl, this isn't a good time." Suddenly she got up, and rushed at me, as much as a woman her age could and raised her cane. I really thought she was going to bash my face in. She likes hitting people with her cane, but this stance she was doing with it now was a murderous one. She was going to fucking kill me. And then she stopped. Melinda and Luke both popped out. "That's punishment for annoying me so much," Melinda slyly stated. "Pudgy already got his for trying to sneak out," Cheryl added. "Does this mean Luke's staying or not?" Cheryl answered. "You all can have fatass if you really want him that bad. I'll get me a real man who can keep up with my rhythm." With that, she left. To think, an encounter with Cheryl where nothing bad happened. But I could tell even as she said it, there was a sadness in her voice. I began to think she was trying not to seem as hurt by Luke's departure as she really was. Luke was ready to celebrate when Melinda brought down the party. "We're going to lay a few ground rules down. Luke, I don't like you much. I'm letting you stay here because of Jake, and it's a mystery why I do so much for him. I don't want to see you. I don't want to hear you. And all panties will stay in drawers." Erika raised her fist in support at this declaration. And here I am after this day of activity. I have a feeling this is only the beginning.

Thread 66
03/06/08(Thu)02:34:37 No.57036147

Hello /b/, blindmuteloli guy here to save the day. Or at least, that's what everybody wants of me. A few days ago I got a knock on my door. It was none other than Jim. I was pleasantly surprised to see him doing so well so soon. I wasn't so pleasantly surprised when I found out what he wanted of me. He comes in, and plops right down on the couch like he's just coming in for a friendly chat. He starts it off with nice little conversation about how he's doing, etc. I ask him about his kids, he says they're doing fine. I offer him something to drink, and it's all relaxed. I wasn't though, because I know nobody ever comes to me just to chat. And then he says "you know Jake, we would make great roomates". Red flag goes off, but I ignore it and agree. Which leads him to his next statement, "Well Jake about that..." And he tells me his sob story. Cynthia went crazy when Jim didn't come home that night. She was considering calling the police to report him missing, so her kids ended up spilling the beans. According to Jim, she went nuts. She actually confronted Sharon at her house (which is really the same house since it's a duplex) and slapped her more than once, then went to the hospital and got in a huge confrontation with Jim when he was still on his hospital bed which led to her having to be "escorted" out of the hospital before she killed somebody. Jim, upon his release, went to Cynthia to try and make things up. Obviously this didn't work, so he went to a hotel. But now he's out of money, and he needs to stay with me. Jim's a nice guy, I empathized with him, but obviously I couldn't say yes without the approval of Melinda. And considering I already had to push her to let Luke stay, it didn't seem likely. But then it hit me. "Why don't you stay with Sharon?" "Well Jake, I tried that too, but she's mad at me it seems."
03/06/08(Thu)02:36:17 No.57036312

So I called Sharon up to see what the problem was. "Sharon, Jim is at my house and he wants to stay. Could you take him in?" "I already told him no." "Why?" "Jake, I don't know who's baby it is." Oh lord. At that moment, I imagined everybody on the set of Maury, Mark doing a happy dance as it's revealed that he's not the father. "Would you like to explain?" "I'm pregnant, I don't know if it's Mark's or Jim's kid." Yes, Sharon is pregnant, and yes she doesn't know who the father is. I had actually been slightly suspicious that she was pregnant, since she was showing a bit. She didn't tell me how far into it she is, but I'm guessing at least a few months since her bulge is already becoming somewhat noticeable. All of those pregnancy hormones and confusion over her baby daddy is making her unstable to say the least, and she didn't want to deal with Jim. She's also still afraid that Mark is going to hunt her down and give her a fist abortion. Don't know when those two are getting divorced, but it's pretty soon I would imagine. I told you, didn't I? I also don't think Mark would agree to take a paternity test, so Sharon may be shit out of luck. I don't really empathize though, it's her fault for sleeping around. Of course Jim did the same thing and I was defending him... that's not sexist. About Jim, the question is whether I tell him. He seems to be totally oblivious (as usual) to Sharon's pregnancy. After all of the drama he's going through now, it may be too much.
03/06/08(Thu)02:37:11 No.57036392

Speaking of pregnancy, I've been informed that my sister got the spawn fermenting in her stomach killed. The funny thing about it is though she's actually acting depressed over it, after she acted like a street beggar trying to get money from me for her abortion. Furthermore, my parents said she actually went goth after she had it done. Yes, she's actually started dressing in black and painting her face white and all of the other shit goths or emos or whatever those kids do, and she wants to change her name to "Rosemary". The real kicker is that they also found a used condom in their trash can just recently. I wouldn't be surprised if her next antic is to become a gothic anorexic transgender crackwhore and join the circus to wrestle bears (and probably have sex with them). My parents aren't that humorous as to come up with such a funny joke, so I'm betting they're serious. Yeah, I facepalmed too. If I see her I'm going to have to give her a cuntpunt.
03/06/08(Thu)02:38:50 No.57036544

But I have more important things to worry about than her. Back to Jim, I told him just to stay and maybe when Melinda gets home I'd ask. She's already at her wit's end with Luke though. Luke is weak for panty drawers, I swear. When he sniffs that cotton allure he just can't stay away. Melinda has already reported some mysteriously disappearing and reappearing pairs, and I've noticed some gone from Erika's drawers too (though I wouldn't tell her, she might strangle Luke herself). I'm going to have start instituting mandatory room checks like we're in a prison. There also was an incident with Melinda was walking in... while Luke was doing his towel dance for me (oh god just don't ask). Never mention that again. I don't think he's doing anything that bad though, I do leave him alone every day with Erika when I go to work. He's also looking for his own job though, so I don't know what I'll do when he gets it. Erika still likes him, even though she thinks he's a raging pervert, which he is, but so am I. Of course Jim is (as far as I know) not a raging pervert, but a down to Earth person who likes beer and football. Melinda returned home, and I presented his case. Melinda gave mean the meanest look I've ever seen. "Is that a no?" "Yes." "Yes, he can stay?" "I'm not in the mood Jake." "What's wrong?" Not that I really cared, but I was trying to play the nice guy. "My dad is coming Sunday." OH HELL NO, now I care. As you remember, my last meeting with her dad didn't go so well at all. "Why is he coming?" "He didn't say, he just said it was important." Agh, my court date with Ryan is also next week too, meaning I have to deal with them both. "But anyway, about Jim..." "NO." "Why not?" "Where would he sleep Jake? There's my room, your room, Erika's, Luke is taking up the last one..." "He'd find somewhere, like the couch." And then Jim did a brilliant move. He began sobbing like a baby, spouting things like "I should have never betrayed her." It was loud enough for Erika to come downstairs pretty pissed at "the faggot whos crying" (I taught her faggot). As it would have it, Melinda was moved by this little spectacle and agreed begrudgingly to let him stay. And he's still here. He mostly lazes around the house, pretty damn depressed. It's kind of annoying, but I guess I do owe him. He needs time, he'll get back on his feet.
03/06/08(Thu)02:41:10 No.57036746

I did try to go to Cynthia on his behalf though. I rang the doorbell, and she answered. "Hello Jake." "Uh hi, I just came here to--" "Look Jake, if you're here to try and defend my shitbag husband and the whore next door then you might as well just leave. I never want to hear his name again." Okay, that wasn't going to work. Plan B. "I just came here to check up on the kids." THE KIDS. Using children as pawns in social games is always the best. Even still, I did care about how they were feeling. I went up to go see them, and they both ran up to hug me crying "Uncle Jake!". No, actually they asked me what the hell I was doing here. Aren't they appreciative of my concern? "How are you guys doing?" "Fine, why?" "Well, with the stuff happening between your parents..." "What stuff?" Oh crap, I better not have just stepped on a landmine here. I think I did. "Well um..." "You mean our dad still being in the hospital right? Mom said he'd be out soon and he'd be coming back." I see, she's lying to them.
03/06/08(Thu)02:41:45 No.57036800

On one hand, it's not good to lie as it'll just be worse for them when they know the truth. On the other hand, I'm not being the one to tell them their parents hate each other. Suddenly Amelia spoke up. "What's adultery?" Melinda smiled at me, she likes seeing me squirm. "Well, adultery is when... well... it's when adults..." Screw it. "They take children to factories and turn them into adults and force them into slave labor in China." She was shocked by this revelation. "My dad's been turning kids into slaves!?" This sounded like a bad episode of some Cartoon Network show. "No, I lied." "What is it then?" "What's two to the second power?" "To the what?" "If a tree falls in the forest and nobody hears it, does it make a sound?" "Yes." "What is the sound of one hand clapping?" This one managed to confuse her, as she sat there and pondered it. Melinda went over to me and gave me a kiss on the cheek. "What was that for?" "You're cute. I bet you're still a virgin." "What's a virgin?" cried out Amelia. Oh fuck this, I'm outta here before I have to bust out the Ship of Theseus.
03/06/08(Thu)02:42:29 No.57036860

n final news, I got a call from a doctor today. Cheryl's been doing a lot worse, and he was asking me if I knew any relatives that she might have to take care of her. I only knew of one, and he's in the ground under a pile of dirt. The doctor also asked Gloria, but she said me since she's out of her mind. I could convince her I'm the zombie of Commodore Perry. I'll be back on Sunday (hopefully, if I make it out alive) with a thread on how Melinda's dad and I are getting along, and a few days after that with Law and Order: Fapping to Anime Unit. Cross your fingers that they realize Ryan is a subhuman piece of shit.
Thread 67

Note: Timestamps unavailable.
Post 1

Sup /b/, blindmuteloli guy here. Melinda's dad came yesterday, and you can expect he wasn't happy. He showed up all by himself, so that's one positive. Anyway, when he showed up he immediately went into a tirade. Jim, Luke, and I were all there. "What the hell is this? What are you running here girl, an orgy?" And he pronounced the g in orgy like "organ". "Dad they're just living here..." "I don't approve of it, kick em out! Where am I supposed to sleep?" I spoke up. "There's a room for you already." "Boy I did not and will not ask for your opinion. Let me tell you something. What belongs to my girl belongs to me. This is my house now, and you will follow my rules. I have 3 of them: No lip, no lip, and no lip. Don't get snappy with me."
Post 2

I showed him up to his room, and he wanted to see the rest of the house. "Now where do you all sleep? You better not be sleeping with my girl." Melinda herself wasn't home yet, so this task was left to us. I showed him my room, Melinda's, Erika's, Luke's. "Now where does he sleep?" (referring to Jim). "On the couch." "Oh, a freeloader is he?" Jim was in fact lazing on the couch at that very time, smelling like shit. He's been increasingly annoying, being a depressed slob, but it's highly possible that's how he acts at home. His kids come over occasionally, but his wife doesn't like it. I'm hoping they'll kiss and make up soon, because I'm kind of tired with dealing with Jim's mopey attitude. He went back downstairs, saying "What you all got to eat around here?" He was about sit down on the couch, but Jim was sprawled on it. "Now listen here boy you sit up right and make room." Jim exploded. I've never seen him even remotely angry. He got up, and looked the man right in his face. "I am not a 'boy'. I am a fucking middle aged man, I'm not your fucking inferior so you give me my damn respect." Everybody in the room, even Melinda's dad, was shocked. When you're used to his "-aroo's" and such it's shocking to see him so assertive. Jim walked away, and Melinda's dad finally got out his authoritative comeback. "I oughta pop that boy." Erika came out to meet our guest, and was surpisingly endeared with him. I guess he just sort of exerts that old fashioned charm (some) people like. He let Erika curl right up to him. "Well hello there sweetie. How are you doing? You raising this girl right?" "Uuh... I guess?" "They touch you in any odd places girl?" I wanted to facepalm, but that would just bring more reprimand from him. Erika smiled and shook her head no.
Post 3

Melinda came home and greeted her father more enthusiastically than I expected after the Christmas incident. "Why did you come here dad?" "Well I worry about you. You know I'm out of work, so I just wanted to see how your life's going. Just pretend like I'm not here." Under my breath I said, "yeah that'll be easy." "Booy if you keep on running your mouth I'm gonna give you two poppings: a left and a right." That was okay, I could keep my snide comments to myself and generally be presentable. Or so I thought. Melinda went to go make some food for her father, and I settled down to play Devil May Cry 4. Erika cuddled up under my arm, and Luke sat down beside us to watch. When Melinda's dad finishes, Luke is playing now and I'm sitting there. He comes out, and looks at the screen for a bit. "What in the name of the lord are you all doing here?" "Playing Devil May Cry." "Devil may what? What is this crap?" "It's a video game." "Like that Mario?" "Yeah, kind of." "What's the objective?" "Killing demons I guess." He goes to the TV, and squats down by the 360. He looks cryptically at it as we keep on playing. He goes over to the power strip, and pulls out a power cord. It's to a completely unrelated system. "What are you doing?" "I'm turning this junk off. You shouldn't be exposing a child to this crap. All that about demons. Now I'm not some sort of old fogey, if you boys want to play this crap that's fine, but you shouldn't be playing it in front of a child!" Luke and I looked at each other, but he continued playing. He pulled out another cord, which again had no effect. He began scratching his head. "How do you turn this thing off?" I imagine he was feeling pretty embarassed, of course it's expected since even Pong came pretty late in his lifetime. "You don't." "No?" He still looked sort of confused, so he began walking away. As he walked by Luke, he snatched the controller. I was about to grab for it since I expected him to try and throw it up against a wall, but instead he said "Well what do I do here?" Luke was fighting Sanctus, who was floating around. I was confused by why he wanted to play, but thought it had potential for amusement. Actually we were all a bit confused at this old man acting like he's a time traveler from the 14th centry who's just seen the lightbulb.
Post 4

"Use the control stick to move the character." "Which one is the control stick now?" "The gray circle thing." He moved them both around. "You only need to use one." He was running around, when suddenly the controller vibrated. "Woah!" and he dropped it. "That thing moved!" "That was vibration." "It vibrates?" "Yeah, it's a feature." "I don't think I can play these games." He went upstairs, at about the same time Jim walked in. He had clearly been out in the cold. "Did you go to try and see Cynthia again?" "Yeah." "You gotta give her time." This was Luke talking to him, I was playing now and not paying attention. Erika was breaking my skills by climbing all over me, but I didn't mind. "She just won't listen to me. I've apologized over and over. What does she want?" "Just leave her alone." "I can't do that!" "She'll come back to you." "What do you think Jake?" Just as he said that, Erika ended up tumbling over my head pushing us both off the couch. On the ground with her sitting on my head I kept on playing since I was so close. "Well?" "Uuuh... I agree with Luke." Melinda's dad came back downstairs, and we heard a knock on the door. "I'll get that." He opened the door, and it was Sharon. Erika was being fiddly with me, so I got up and gave her a false piledriver on the couch. Then I realized I had just died. Damnit. I looked over at Sharon and Melinda's dad, at Jim, and then at the game screen. On the screen: "Abandon All Hope." Oddly appropriate.
Post 5

Sharon came to speak to Jim, so they went into the kitchen where Melinda was. She came out to join us. "Why is she here?" "What do you think?" "Isn't it a bit counter-productive for them to be seeing each other?" "Not really, she might be carrying Jim's child." And suddenly I realized I had said something that was new to most people besides me in the room. "What?" I tried to play it off non-chalantly. "You heard me." Melinda's spoke up. "What in the hell is going on here?" We explained the situation to him. "I tell you, you kids. Let me tell you somehing." Melinda tried to interrupt, but her dad protested. "No, let me tell you a story. Now I was a young boy about 14..." and he told us a long story about him and his wife. They met when they were kids, fell in love, she stayed (according to his knowledge) loyal while he served in the war, he came back, they got married, and never had a "lick of trouble". Jim reappared, and Sharon left without a word. "What's got her pissed?" "She wants me to take a paternity test." "Oh, are you going to?" "I suppose I have to. The thing that irked her was when I said she should get an abortion if it's mine." Luke went back to playing DMC, but felt it pertinent to interject. "You can't really do that Jim. Technically, you were cheating on your wife when you got her pregnant." Jim corrected him, "IF I got her pregnant." Melinda met Luke with a sharp glare. "You wouldn't know anything about cheating, would you Luke?" He looked ashamed and went back to his game. Eventually the conversation dispersed since it was a touchy subject. Erika jumped on me again. "Geeze, what's made you so energetic today?" She reached for her paper and pen. "What's an 'aborshon'?" "It's when a woman gets rid of an unborn baby." "Why?" "She decides she doesn't want it." "Why doesn't she give it to other people?" "A lot of people don't want other people's babies, they want their own." "Shouldn't they take all of the babies that are here before they make new ones?" "Probably." I realized Erika understood this more than me, not being adopted herself for a long while.
Post 6

Today, I was watching animu on my 360 when Melinda's dad came up to me again."Watching a cartoon here? Well I like those too. Mind if I sit down?" "Uuh sure." This probably wasn't going to be the bugs bunny he was expecting. "What is this called?" "Sayonara Zetsubou Sensei." "Speak English boy!" He watched as Zetsubou Sensei lectured on self-conscious duties. "Now why are they showing that blonde girl's panties?" "It's a joke." "It's peverse!" "Well, she's supposed to be a stereotypical american." "Oh, so the japs are making fun of us?" "I guess so." "And you approve?" "It's just a joke." He watched a bit more before he left. I don't think our interests connect. Tomorrow I have to go to court with Ryan, which should be fun. Not only that, my legal defense (Sharon) is a pregnant, hormonal mess. I also found out that there's no jury, so there's nobody to try and soften up.


09/06/08(Sat)02:12:09 No.1461065

Hello everyone. This is blindmuteloli guy, here again for one last update. I know I left you all hanging for a while, but I had real life business to attend to. I had a lot of things about myself and my situation that I needed to improve, and I could no longer justify spending so much time on the Internet. So first, I'll talk about how I've been (I know, I know, get to the loli faggot). I still work at the same "restaurant", but I've been upgraded to assistant manager. Thus, I make more money (though I'm not a rich man still) and I'm able to support Erika and I living alone in an apartment, paying the rent all by myself like a big boy. We left on good terms with Melinda, and we're still good friends with her. I have yet to pursue any higher education but I'm working on it. I also finished that anger management course with no troubles.

Now for the person you really care about, Erika. She's started school, and she performs very well. Her teacher tells me that she's exceptionally smart (although that could be the usual idle flattery from teachers, here's actually more to Erika's teacher too, but I'll tell you later. ) and she's made a lot of friends. No boyfriends yet though. She told me that the boys are all immature and that she much prefers me. I won't argue with her. Nobody's bullied her either. She has a nice plump little aide who escorts her around the building. She stopped talking, and hasn't yet restarted. I've generally dropped the issue. If she doesn't want to (well really she can't), it's her choice. Her father is still in prison, and I hope he stays that way. His lawyer has tried to harass us a few times, but I've never given in to him.
09/06/08 02:13:34 No.1461073

Cheryl, unfortunately, died. Her cancer was fatal. It was really depressing to watch her deteriorate slowly. She fought it until the end, but she slowly became more docile and grandmother-like. On one visit, she even told Erika and I that she loved us both. I normally don't get emotional, but I started crying. I was there when she died. She looked peaceful, as if she drifted away to sleep. I hope she was peaceful. I think Erika and I really did make her feel useful, or at least like she had good friends. Gloria took it pretty hard too. On a particular night, she tried to kill herself. That's a long story though, and I don't feel like telling it. She's slowly coping now though.

Sharon gave birth to her baby, James. He's a cute little guy. Mark is still there too, and he's still Mark. Even though they divorced, they somehow still seem to have an odd one minute antagonistic one minute romantic relationship. Sharon has a positive influence on him though. He tries to be less insensitive (trying being the key word, although I'm glad that he makes an earnest effort). His mom died too, but she was an old bat anyway. My younger sister finally got herself straightened out. No more promiscuous sex, no more drugs, she's back on track. And no, I didn't bang her... maybe. My older sister still makes more money than me and loves to lord it over me. My parents are still very supportive and love Erika.
09/06/08 02:13:58 No.1461076

Jim's wife ended up divorcing him. I sort of saw it coming. Jim is a bum and a slob, though a good-natured one, and Cynthia is an uptight, business oriented woman. The kids took it kind of hard. They used to come over to my place a lot when mommy and daddy needed to "talk". Jim gets to have custody of the kids on the weekends. It actually worked out for him in the end though. Jim met Erika's teacher, Brooke, at a PTA meeting and they hit it off. Brooke is a pretty young teacher with a nice body. Erika says that the boys in the class make perverted comments about her. To be quite honest, I wanted a crack at her, but Jim got her first. I don't really see the attraction, since he's a middle-aged, slightly overweight guy and she's young and perky but I suppose it's not my place to interfere.

Ryan and I went our separate ways. I told him that maybe someday we could be friends, but that I had to focus on my primary obligations to my daughter first. He agreed, and he said that he envied me. Here's what he last said to me: "Jake, you're an underachiever. You're not the smartest or the strongest, you pretty much suck at everything. But you try hard and you're a good person. I envy you, because I don't know the unselfish love you have for Erika." I've gained respect for Ryan. Or rather, more of a realization. He's complex individual, just like the rest of us. He does do bad things; he hurts other people and he sociopathically manipulates others, but he does have the same emotions as everyone else.
09/06/08 02:14:25 No.1461083

Melinda is still living in her same big house. Her dad was pleased as punch when I moved out, saying he didn't want my "dirty insemination" (his exact words, each sylablle enunciated with his cantakerous tone, little droplets of spit escaping his mouth with each sound) spoiling his good daughter. Melinda is still single too. Luke's tried off and on to get back together with her, but with no luck.

As for Luke, he's still the same guy. He still watches the same anime and is still sort of a pedophile pervert. There's actually a funny story about him. I was reading a doujin on my computer, and Erika asked me what I was doing. I told her, and she asked me what it was about. I said that a guy leaves a little "present" for his sister in her panties. She inquires more about it, so I finally tell her that he jerked off into them and let them for her to change into. A few days later, Luke, being the kind guy he is, bought Erika a present and happily informed her that he had a gift for her consumption. She was horrified and ran away.

And that's really how everyone's been. If there's anybody I missed, you can be sure to ask me about them.

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