Hell-O & Whalecum to the 109th edition of HSN!
- WWE Royal Rumble has concluded and what a show! With the first ever Women's Rumble match, as well as the regular Rumble, we have seen a lot of surprises! Shinsuke Nakamura won the match with all the fans delighted, while Asuka (not this one
) won the first ever Women's Rumble match, and Ronda Rousey from the UFC made her WWE debut after being teased since 2015.
- In sad news, Ingvar Kamprad, the founder of IKEA passed away at 91 in his sleep. IKEA is a furniture giant in the industry where it started as a mail order business where he sold replicas of his Uncle's kitchen table. He left behind a revolutionary business for good ass furniture and may he rest in peace.
- Jan 31st will be a rare night, as we will see a Super blue blood Moon! Which is a Su-su-su-SUPAH Moon, a Blood Moon, and a Total Solar Eclipse all in one night! HOLY FUCK!!! Remember the date, Jan. 31st! With my luck, I probably won't see it due to the GODDAMN CLOUDS!!! *cocks gun* GET CHO' ASSES OUTTA DA WAY, NIGGAZ!!!
- Ah California, what happened to you? You're now the home of left-winged, cuckolding, sensitive, pussified, SJW losers. Your laws are total garbage, charging people for mis-gendering someone, yet give lesser charges to others knowingly exposing people to HIV. However, this new law that makes it illegal for servers at restaurants to give out plastic straws unless asked is trivial and ass backwards. What's the point of this law? To stop environmental damage? Nope! Oh, and it's punishable by up to six months in jail and a $1,000 fine? BLOW ME!!!!
- The Doomsday clock has now been moved 2 minutes to midnight. This has been the closest since the Cold War in 1953. Meh, I sleep.
- Finally, IT'S THE END OF THE WORLD... again for the 1.5 billionth time!!! This time, the world will end in June 24, 2018. Another goddamn mother fuckin' cock ass Conspiracy Theorist by the name of Mathieu Jean-Marc Joseph Rodrigue claims the world will end this year and yet again turns to the Bible to "prove his point" from the book of Revelations, the quote being ‘He was given authority to act for 42 months" or some shit.
Listen, I'm not going to turn this HSN issue into a Religious fuck fest of shit, but every other person has turned to the Bible or some theory they pulled out of their ass and it never happens. I'm pretty sure that it says nothing in the Bible about the end of us. So, unless you have concrete evidence of our existence coming to an end, you need to SHUT THE FUCK UP!!!
Oh, and one more thing, as I wrote in my HSR article on HS!Z, I said if the World ended, I would suck everyone's dick, cuck myself, and re-enact EVERY DA fetish art in existence. Well, seeing as I am confident as always, I'M GONNA GO ALL THE WAY!!! If the World ends (which I doubt), I will do all of the above, plus shoving every sharp object up my ass, be castrated, get fucked by EVERY organism known in a pool of piss and shit, all while watching every and I mean EVERY shock video known to man!!! I'll be waiting.
This is the madassgamer and I'm gonna bitch slap these end date assholes in a Hell in a Cell match!!!