Hell-o all and whalecum to the 13th edition of HOLY SHIT NEWS!

-HOLY FUCK! IT'S EASTER!!! The only day (Aside from Halloween) where it's acceptable to chow your fat ass face down with chocolate given to you by Bugs Bunny's gay cousin as well as some weird ass eggs with more candy in it... Oh and Jesus.

-The 2017 model of the iPhone is rumored to pull an Irate Gamer and will feature a curved screen and an AMOLED display. I don't know how good the shit's gonna be, but let's see how many people's gonna trade in their phones they got 2 months prior for this thing. STICK WITH ONE DAMN PHONE!

-Mickey D's has trademarked the phrase "The Simpler the Better" for their new marketing strategy. I don't know how in the monkey balls crap shit they're gonna make their buisiness "simpler" . I mean, i doesn't take Bill Nye the Fuckin' Science Guy to order a damn cheeseburger. I'd rather have them bring back Ronald McGoddamn Donald personally.

-Seeing as how this edition of HSN is short as fuck, I'll throw in my 2nd HSN movie review. Tonight's review is "Batman v. Superman: Dawn of Justice". The movie is too mother fuckin' long (2 hours and 40 minutes to be exact), the pacing is shite, the ending sucked butthole, and despite what we're all thinking, Batman and Superman only fight for 5 fuckin' minutes! However, despite the first half being boring as all fuck, the action scenes are pretty good, I like the continuity with "Man of Steel", and the fight with Doomsday was badass. Overall, the movie wasn't as bad as people made it out to be, but it does have a handful of flaws. I give it a 3/5, still better than Superman 4... I guess.

This is the madassgamer and I'm gonna take over Hollywood to make better fuckin' movies!

if you think that's long go watch :the lord of the rings two towers extended edition on vhs

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Oh god.... just thinking about that movie..... my head...

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